Irfan: Mujhe nahin pata tha! Sach mein!
Maa: Mujhe laga ki tum mere khushbu ko pehachan loge.
Irfan: Mujhe pata tha! Mai pehale se hi nashe mein tha, lekin teekhi gandh, jo tumhare andar gaharai se thi, itni tej tha ki main use anadekha nahin kar sakata tha.
Maa: Lekin, tumhen yeh pasand nahin aaya.
Irfan: Mujhe yeh bahut pasand aaya!
Maa: Tumane mujhe apna pyaar dikhane ke lie kuch nahin kiya.
Irfan: Tumhen pata nahin hai ki main tumhare chut ka swad lena aur tumhara swadisht ras peena kitna chahta tha.
Maa: Mai khushi-khushi tumhen apni chut chaatne deti aur apni baaki ki jindagi mujhe khaane deti, Irfan. Tumne mujhe chakhane ka mauka thukara diya!
Irfan: Mai abhi behosh ho gaya, maa. Mujhe yaad nahin ki main kab so gaya. Lekin agali subah, jaise hi mai utha, maine khoi hue avasar ki bharapai ke lie kuch bahut hi ganda kaam kiya.
Maa: Tumne mere toothabrash par veeryapaat kiya, hai na?
Irfan: Tumhen pata tha! Maine vaastav mein is par peshaab ki kuch boonden bhi gira dien.
Maa: Jis kshan maine ise pakada, mujhe pata chal gaya ki tumne mere toothabrash ke saath chhedachaad ki hai. Yeh vaastav mein badabudaar tha, lekin mujhe yah bahut pasand aaya!
Irfan: Jab tumne ise apne muh ke andaroni hisse mein daala, to main vismay mei tha. Lekin, mujhe yah bhi sandeh tha ki kya tumhn ehasaas hua ki maine kya kiya tha, jab tumne brush karate samay mere or aankh maari thi.
Maa: Main tumhe bata raha tha ki mujhe yeh pasand aaya. Kya tumhe yeh pasand aaya?
Irfan: haahaaha! Maa! acha. Yeh utana hi acha tha jitna ki tumhen mera veery nigalate hue dekhna.
Maa: Maine us subah koi toothpaste istemaal nahin kiya tha. Main tumhare veery ka swad lena chahti thi. Yeh mujhe meri yoni ke andar garm kar diya. Mai tumhare veery ka swad chakhana chahti thi usake asli roop mein!
Irfan: Kaash main tumhara chehara pakad paata aur main seedhe tumhare munh mein gaharai tak veeryapaat kar deta. Ya, tumhare chehare par! Kam se kam tumhare nanga shareer par.
Maa: Main daravaza khula chhodna chahti thi, yahaan tak ki kapde dhone ke lie bhi! Mujhe ummid thi ki tum turant andar aa jaoge. Lekin phir, main chahti thi ki tum mere shareer par veeryapaat karo – nahane ke baad gila, saaph aur chamakata hua!
Irfan: Aur jab tum naha rahe the, maine tumhara bag khola, tumhare bache hue teenon nae innerwears ko apane lund par ragada, unhen apne saggy balls par ragada, un par veeryapaat kiya, aur teenon par thooka bhi.
Maa: Mujhe yeh ehasaas ghar pahunchate hi hua. Daag saaph dikh rahe the. Haalaanki, maine unhen abhi tak nahin dhoya hai. Vaastav mein, maine ise apani doosare nae painti ke saath rakh diya hai.
Irfan: Theek hai. Lekin main sach mein chahta hun ki tum mujhe bata do ki tum abhi unmen se ek pehan rahi ho! haahaaha! Mai niraash mahasoos kar raha hoon. Mujhe us subah bahut jokhim bhara kathin kaam karana pada!
Maa: achha, yahi ekmaatr aisa maamala hai jahan tumane bhi mujhe niraash kiya.
Irfan: Kya? tumhen yeh pasand nahin aaya! Kya tum mere aisa karane se napharat karate ho?
Maa: Main tumse napharat karati hoon ki tumne paryaapt kaam nahin kiya.
Irfan: Mujhe aur kya karana chaahie tha!
Maa: Agar tumne mere bag ke doosari taraf zip khol diya hota, to tumhen meri istemaal kie hui painti mil jaati, jise maine abhi-abhi nikala tha. Jise maine pichali subah se pehana hua tha. Jo mere taral padaarthon se bhigi hui thi - mera pasina, mera peshaab, mera veery! lekin sabse mahatvapoorn baat, tumhare lie mere vaasana!
Maa: Mai vaastav mein yah kalpana karake santusht hona chahti thi ki tumne ise soongha hoga, aur shaayad chaatkar saaf bhi kiya hoga. Mujhe niraasha hui jab mujhe ehasaas hua ki tumne ise chhua tak nahin tha. Mainne ise sirf tumhare lie vahaan rakha tha, irfan - saath mein ek note bhi tha jis par likha tha " Tumhaare maa tumhaara lund chahti hai "
Irfan: Fuck maa, I missed it.
Maa: haahaaha! tumhaara nukasaan!
Irfan: Mujhe is par yakin nahin ho raha hai. Mai yeh sweekaar nahin kar sakata ki tumane aisa kiya. Lekin main yeh kaise chook gaya?!
Maa: Mai sach mein chahta hoon ki main apne bete ka shaant aur sanyamit chehara abhi dekh paata! haahaaha!
Irfan: kaash maine tumhare bag ka daahina hissa chek kiya hota!
Maa: lol! khud ko bhagyashali samajho ki main tumhen dusara mauka de raha hun.
Irfan: Ab main chahta hun ki yeh yaatra kabhi khatm hi na ho. Ek aur din aur main tumhen zaroor le jaata!
Maa: Tumhen jaldee nahin karani chaahie tha. Tumne hi flight book ki thi. Tum jaldee se college vaapas jaana chahte the!
Irfan: Maine ticketen pahale hi book kar li then. Mujhe nahin pata tha ki ham aisa karenge!
Maa: Haahaaha! train se yaatra karana sahi hota. Ek lambi train yaatra. Mere Arun aur tumhare Neema kee tarah hi ulajhan bhari! Haaha!
Irfan: ya phir kabhi na khatm hone waali bas yaatra. Jahaan ham khud ke lie peechhe ki seat rakhte! Fuck!
Maa: Haaha! Mai to Delhi se ghar tak paidal bhi chal sakati thi. Are haan, haan! agar tum har 5 minute mein ek baar mujhe chodne ki lie taiyaar ho jao. lol!
Irfan: Kya guaranti hai?
Maa: Achha. Mai to bas poore do hazaar kilometer poori tarah nanga hokar chalunga! Kya itni soch hi guaranti ke lie kaafi nahin hai?! haahaaha!
Irfan: Ruko! Tumne mujhe abhi tak nahin bataaya ki tumne mujhe pahali baar nanga kab dekha tha. Kya tum mujhe bata sakati ho ki wah kab tha?!
Maa: Nahin. Tumhen pata hona chahie tha ki maine tumhen nanga kab dekha. Tumne nahin kiya - meri galati nahin hai! maaf karana.
Irfan: Chalo, maa. Mai tumhen sab kuchh bataata hoon. Mere saath aisa mat karo. Mujhe nahin lagata ki jab tak main sach nahin jaan lunga, main saans le paaunga! please!
Maa: Haahaaha! haan! lekin, mai tumhen kuch nahin bataunga!
Irfan: please, maa! Ek baar ke lie patthar banana band karo!
Maa: Tumhen pata hai! Tumhen pata hai ki maine tumhe nanga kab dekha tha! tum bas yah sweekaar karane ki sthiti mein nahin ho ki ham kya kar rahe hain!
Irfan: Kya?! Tum jhooth bol rahi ho, maa! Delhi se pahale kabhi kuch nahin hua!
Maa: Tum itana pakka kaise kah sakate ho? Aur, ab main jhooth kyon bolun, itana sab hone ke baad?!
Irfan: Mujhe samajh nahin aaya. Tum bas mere saath khilavaad kar rahi ho! Tumne mujhe kab nanga dekha!
Maa: Maine tumhen shuru se hi bataaya hai ki main tumhen hamesha nanga dekhta raha hoon!
Irfan: Theek hai, theek hai. Mujhe kuchh pata nahin. Tum jeet gae!
Maa: Uma kaun hai?! Maine dekha ki tum facebook par usake dost ho.
Irfan: Kya?
Maa: woh kaun hai? Uma kaun hai?!
Irfan: isse kya phark padata hai? tum pahale mere savaal ka javaab kyon nahin deti?
Maa: Uma kaun hai?
Irfan: kya bakawaas hai! Tum use nahin jaanti. Isse kya phark padega? tum bewakoophi karana band kyon nahin karati aur mujhe kyon nahin batati ki tumane mujhe kab nanga dekha tha!
Maa: Maine tumhen kai baar nanga dekha hai. Asal mein, main ginti bhool gai hoon!
Irfan: Tumhen har cheez itni sakht kyon banani padati hai, maa?!
Maa: Irfan. Mujhe batao ki woh kaun hai. Mai jaanana chahti hoon!
Irfan: Tum uske baare mein itani chintit kyon ho?
Maa: Main nahin hoon!
Irfann: To, kya hai?!
Maa: Mai bas janna chahti hoon.
Irfan: Theek hai. Kya usne tumhen koi sandesh bheja hai?
Maa: Nahin. kyun?!
Irfan: Mai bas tumse poochh rahi hoon.
Maa: Tum chintit kyon lag rahe ho?! Kya use mere bete ke baare mein kuch pata hai jo usaki maa ko pareshaan kar sakata hai?
Irfan: Bas karo! Aisa kuchh nahin hai. Tum mujhe sach kyon nahin bataati! Yeh itana hi saral hai.
Maa: Mujhe batao ki woh kaun hai, aur main tumhaare saath sach saajha karne ke baare mein sochungi!
Irfan: woh mere mitr soochi mein hai - Tumane use vahaan dekha! To, woh mere mitr hai.
Maa: Tumhara dost?! Tumhaare saath school mein padhane wali dost ki tarah?
Irfan: Theek hai. mera facebook friend.
Maa: Tum usase kab mile?
Irfan: Tumhara kya matalab hai?
Maa: Yahaan itna ulajhan bhara kya hai? Maine tumse poochha ki tum usse kab mile!
Irfan: Tum yeh sab kyun jaanna chahte ho? Main usse nahin mila hoon.
Maa: kyun? Tumhen usse milane ka man nahin hua?
Irfan: Hamne sirf online baat ki.
Maa: baat ki? pahale kisne kisse baat kee? Tum ab usse baat nahin karte?
Irfan: Tum mujhe seedhe-seedhe kyon nahin bata sakte ki tumne mujhe pahali baar nanga kab dekha?!
Maa: maine tumhen pehale hi bata diya hai, Irfan. Mai tumhen yeh baat hamari is baatcheet ke shuru se hi bata raha hoon. Main tumhen hamesha nanga hi dekhta raha hoon.
Irfan: Tum mujhe pareshaan kar rahe ho! maa! yeh kya hai?!
Maa: Tum Uma ko kaise jaanate ho?
Irfan: Theek hai, jo tum chaaho karo. lekin, itna jiddi mat bano! theek hai. Toh ham online mile, maa. Ham kabhi vaastavik roop se nahin mile. Hamare paas kabhi mauka nahin tha. Aur, sach kahoon to, maine abhi tak uska chehara bhi nahin dekha hai. na hi usne mera chehara dekha hai. Mera matalab hai, usne mujhe un tasveeron mein dekha hai jo main upload karata hoon. Lekin, uski profile mein koi bhi nahin hai.
Maa: Mujhe samajh nahin aaya. Aap is baat par zor kyon de rahe hain ki usne aapka chehara sirf aapki apalod ki gae tasveeron mein hi dekha hai? Agar aap usse asal mein nahin mile hain, to woh apka chehara kaise dekhgi!
Irfan: Ham bas... aap jaante hain... log internet freind kise kahate hain! haan?! Ab aap samajh gae? Woh meri chat-mate hai.
Maa: chat-mate? sirf chat-mate. ya…
Irfan: Ya? tum kis or ishaara kar rahe ho?
Maa: kya woh tumhare sex-chat-mate hai?!
Irfan: Tumne yeh savaal kyun poocha? tum kya saabit karana chaah rahe ho?
Maa: Mujhe yah pasand nahin hai jab tum jhooth bolate ho.
Irfan: Main jhooth nahin bol raha hoon.
Maa: Tum jhooth nahin bol sakate, Irfan. Agar tum mujhse sach jaanna chahte ho to tum jhooth nahin bol sakte. Isalie, jhooth bolana band karo!
Irfan: Mujhe nahin pata ki tumhari samasya kya hai. Lekin, main tumse ladna nahin chaahta.
Maa: To mat bolo!
Irfan: Theek hai. usne mujhe ek saal pahale se message karana shuru kiya tha. Darasal, usse bhi zyaada. Mujhe lagata hai. Ham dheere-dheere apne rishton ke baare mein baat karne lage, aur jald hi apne partner ke saath shaareerik antarangata ke baare mein bhi. Hamen apni kalpanaon ke baare mein ek-doosare ko bataane mein zyaada samay nahin laga. Hamen pata hi nahin chala ki hamane kab sex message bhejna shuru kar diya tha.
Maa: To, aap sirf apni maa se hi sex nahin karate! aapke paas bahut see mahilaen hain!
Irfan: maa. please! aisa nahin hai. main sirf Uma se hi sex kar raha hoon.
Maa: Aur, aap kitani baar usse sex kar rahe hain?
Irfan: Theek hai. Mai aapse yah baat nahin chhipaana chaahata. Bahut baar!
Maa: Har din?
Irfan: Lagabhag har din.
Maa: Kya tum apni girl friends ko date karana jaaree rakhte ho?
Irfan: Are…haan.
Maa: Aahana ko kuch pata hai?
Irfan: sach mein nahin. Usne mujhse poochha ki kya main kuch aisa kar raha hoon jisase use dukh pahunche. Lekin use nahin pata.
Maa: Tumhen kabhi nahin laga ki tum use dhokha de rahe ho?
Irfan: Maa, mujhe nahin pata ki main tumhen yah kaise samajhaoon. Uma ke saath yeh bahut aasaan tha. Mera matalab hai, usne mujhe bahut acha mahasoos karaaya. Ham bahut see cheejon ke baare mein baat karate hain. Mujhe nahin pata kyon. Mujhe lagata hai ki woh mujhe poori tarah se samajhti hai.
Maa: Tum tasveeren bhi saajha karate rahe ho?
Irfan: kya? nahin!
Maa: Haan?! Tumhen yakeen hai? mujhe lagta hai ki tumne pahale hi aisa karane ki baat sweekaar kar li hai, haalaanki jaanboojhakar nahin.
Irfan: Achchha… haan.
Maa: Tumhaara chehara kaatkar?
Irfan: Maaaa…
Maa: Tum use apni nanga tasveeren bhej rahe ho, hai na?!
Irfan: Haan!
Maa: theek hai. to, usane tumhen nanga dekha hai!
Irfan: Isase tumhara kya lena-dena hai? Tum mujhe is tarah pareshaan karana kyon band nahin kar sakate!
Maa: Main chahti hoon ki tum mujhe sab kuch batao, Irfan. Main jaanne ka hakadaar hoon. Kya tumane use nanga dekha hai?! batao!
Irfan: Mujhe yaad nahin hai, maa.
Maa: bakavaas karana band karo!
Irfan: Mujhe yaad hai, maa! tum mujhse ye sab nahin poochh sakate.
Maa: Mai pooch sakti hoon, Irfan. Mein poochh sakati hoon. Kya tumhen yah pasand aaya?
Irfan: Mujhe yah pasand nahin hai!
Maa: haahaaha! Kya tumhen use nanga dekhana pasand aaya? yahi mera savaal tha!
Irfan: mujhe yaad nahin hai.
Maa: theek hai. Mai samajhti hoon. Yah tumhaare lie mushkil hoga. Kya tumane aaj use message kiya? tum ise bhool nahin sakte.
Irfan: Nahin! maine use aaj message nahin kiya.
Maa: kal ke baare mein kya?
Irfan: Achchha. Haan! lekin, hamne mushkil se hi baat ki. Darasal, hamane bilkul bhi baat nahin ki. Maine use ek sandesh bheja tha, aur usne koi javaab nahin diya. Main tumhen message kar raha tha, maa.
Maa: Delhi mein bitae samay ke baare mein kya? jab tum mere saath Delhi mein thee, to tumhen usaki yaad nahin aai?
Irfa: mujhe usaki yaad kyon aaega? Woh bahut hi sahaj hai.
Maa: mujhe laga ki tumane kaha tha ki woh khaas hai!
Irfan: Mujhe nahin pata, maa. shaayad, mujhe uskee yaad aai ho.
Maa: Tum pareshaan thi. Main tumhaare saath tha, aur tum use message nahin kar pai?
Irfan: chalo, maa. Main pareshaan nahin tha. vaise bhi, mai un sabhi dinon mein usse baat nahin kar sakata tha. Woh aashram mein yog shivir mein bhaag lene gai thi.
Maa: Tumane abhi tak mujhe nahin bataaya ki tumhen use nanga dekhana pasand tha ya nahin.
Irfan: oh, maa! tum ek jiddee insaan ho. yah theek tha.
Maa: bas theek? use nanga dekhakar hi tumhen theek laga?
Irfan: haan.
Maa: Aah, Uma! Tum ek kaamuk mohak ho! yah meri poori zindagi mein dekhi gaie sabase hot cheez hai. Main un stanon ko apane haathon mein lene ke lie mar jaoonga. Tumhaari choot ki keemat ek arab dolar hai, beby! Main chahta hoon ki main kam se kam tumhaare baalon vaale chhed ko soongh sakoon. Agar tum mujhe apne nange pair chaatne do to main khushee se tumhaara gulaam ban jaunga! Tumhen pata hai ki tumhen mere lie kabhi paise nahin dene honge! tumhen mujhe khilane ki bhi zaroorat nahin hai. Mai sirf tumhaare mal par zinda rahoonga!
Irfan: kya?!
Maa: tum samajhate nahin?
Irfan: Tumhaaree himmat kaise hui? kya bakavaas hai! Tumane to shaalinata ki saari haden paar kar deen, maa....
Maa: Oh, haan?! mainne ek had paar kar dee?!
Irfan: Tumhen aisa nahin karana chaahie tha! tumhen aisa nahin karana chaahie tha!
Maa: tum aisa kyon kah rahee ho ki mujhe aisa nahin karana chaahie?
Irfan: bekaar kee bahas band karo! Tumhen mere facebook account mein log in karane ke lie khud par sharm aani chaahie
Maa: Mujhe laga ki tumne kaha tha ki tum mujhe apni patni banaana chahte ho. Tumhare patni ko yah dekhne ka adhikaar hai ki tum social mediya par kya kar rahe ho!
Irfan: Tum mere chat ko aise hee access nahin kar sakate. Tumne mujhe dhokha diya. Tum bahut badanaam ho! Mai tumase itne samay tak baat karane ke lie khud se napharat karata hoon!
Maa: Irfan. Mai samajhta hoon ki tum naaraaz ho. Lekin mere saath itna asabhy mat bano. Tum mujhe chot pahuncha rahe ho. Maine aisa kuch nahin kiya! Maine tumhaare account mein log in nahin kiya! Maine tumhaaree chat access nahin kee.
Irfan: Oh, haan? sach mein? Tum ummeed karate ho ki main is par yakeen karoon?! Tumhen kaise pata ki maine use kaun-se sandesh bheje the? Tum itne samay se mujh par jaasoosi kar rahe the! Tum bahut ghatiya ho, maa.
Maa: Irfan! band karo. Tumane sab kuchh galat samajha hai!
