Update 97
Rita seedhe pitaji ko dekh rahi thi, dono ke chehre itne kareeb the ki mujhe yakin hai pitaji ko Rita ki saansein aur uski khushboo mehsoos ho rahi hogi. Pitaji ki nazar ab bhi idhar-udhar bhaag rahi thi, shayad unhone bhi Rita ki aankhon mein ek ajeeb si jadugari shakti mehsoos ki thi. Jab bhi koi uski aankhon mein dekhta, woh apne dil ki baat bina roke sab kuch bol deta.
Computer ke saamne baitha main, jab Rita ki woh sakht aur jadugari bhari nazar dekhi, toh mera dil bhi kaanp utha. Jaise Rita ne sirf pitaji ko nahi, balki door company mein baithe mujhe bhi hypnotize kar diya ho. Pehle ke waqt mein, maine kabhi kyun nahi dekha ki Rita mein itna gambhir roop bhi hai? Jabse Rita aur pitaji ke beech yeh rishta shuru hua, tabse mujhe ehsaas hua ki maine shayad Rita ko kabhi poori tarah samjha hi nahi. Rita ke aur bhi kai roop hain jo mujhe nahi pata.
“Agar is waqt pitaji ka sar achanak aage badhe, toh kya woh Rita ke hothon par ekdum se hamla kar denge?” Pata nahi kyun, is waqt mere dimaag mein yeh behuda khayal aaya.
“Jawab do… meri aankhon mein dekho,” Rita ki awaaz ne meri yeh “hawa mein udti soch” ko rok diya. Shayad pitaji ke jawab na dene ki wajah se, Rita ne dobara poocha, uski awaaz mein sakhti bhari hui thi.
“Ahh… maine… bas thodi si baat… suni thi…” Rita ke gusse aur sakhti ko bhaanpte hue, pitaji akhir haar maan gaye aur dheere se apni baat kabul ki. Is waqt pitaji Rita ke sawalon se itne ghabraye hue the ki unki saansein tezi se chalne lagi thi, aur unki saans se Rita ke maathe ki lattein bhi hawa mein hilne lagi thi.
“Toh phir tum do din se mujhse kyun bhaag rahe ho? Mujhse kyun katra rahe ho? Kya maine ab bhi kuch kam kiya hai?” Pitaji ke jawab sunne ke baad Rita ne jaise thodi rahat ki saans li, shayad khushi hui ki usse apni baatein dobara nahi dohrani padengi.
Agar pitaji ne kaha hota ki unhone kuch nahi suna, toh kya Rita woh baatein dobara pitaji ke liye dohra deti? Yeh sochkar mera dil thoda darr gaya, kyunki maine abhi galti se apne dil ke gehre zakhm ko chhed diya tha.
Rita ne dheere se pitaji ka sar wapas uski jagah par rakha, unke liye takiye ko thik kiya, aur pitaji ke safed baalon ko pyar se sahla diya, jo usne abhi uljha diya tha. Uska chehra ab gusse se khali ho chuka tha, saaf dikh raha tha ki Rita ka gussa shayad nakli tha.
“Main… main… uhh…” Pitaji ne Rita ko apna takiya aur baal thik karte hue dekha, aur haklate hue samajh nahi paye ki kya jawab den. Pitaji ki ghabrahat dekhkar, Rita ki aankhon mein ek pal ke liye taras sa dikhayi diya, aisa shayad pehle kabhi nahi hua tha. Pitaji kuch bolna chahte the, par bol nahi pa rahe the, tab Rita ne apna haath unke muh par rakha.
“Papa, jo bolna tha woh maine tumhe hosh mein aane se pehle bol diya tha. Mujhe nahi pata tumne kitna suna, ya shayad jab tum behosh the tab bhi tumhe sab kuch mehsoos ho raha tha. Lekin main yahan ek baar phir se kehti hoon, taaki tumhe koi shak na rahe ya tumhe lagta rahe ki yeh sab sapna tha, theek hai?” Rita ne pitaji ke muh se haath hata liya, seedha baith gayi, aur apni aankhon se pitaji ko dekhte hue dil se dil tak baatein ki. Pitaji ne koi jawab nahi diya, bas unka chehra uljhan aur jhijhak se bhara hua tha.
Pehle ke waqt mein pitaji thodi si pehal karte the, lekin is baar ke haadse ke baad, pitaji bhaagne lage. Zindagi aur maut ke beech se guzarne ke baad bhi kya pitaji ab tak kuch samajh nahi paye? Agar main wajood mein na hota, toh kya Rita aur pitaji ek saath hote?
“Papa, is haadse ke baad maine bahut socha. Zyada baatein ab main nahi karna chahti. Bas itna jaan lo, main tumhe samajhti hoon, tumhare dil ki har baat ko, tumhari har chinta ko. Sach kahu, is baar jab hum ek doosre se itne kareeb se alag hone wale the, maine bahut kuch samajh liya. Ab se tum apne dil mein koi baat mat dabaao, aur main bhi tumhe kabhi dukh nahi doongi. Jo tum chahte ho, woh main tumhe doongi, bas ek baat chhod kar—main Sameer ko chhodkar tumse shadi nahi kar sakti…”
Rita jab yeh sab bol rahi thi, toh hospital mein boli gayi baaton se uska lehja bilkul alag tha. Hospital mein Rita bas bechain thi, pitaji ke hosh mein aane ke liye kuch bhi bol rahi thi, kyunki us waqt pitaji behosh the aur Rita khulkar bol sakti thi. Lekin ab jab saamne pitaji ko yeh wada dohrana pada, toh Rita mein ek aurat wali sharam dikhayi di, aur saath hi thodi si majboori bhi. Agar yeh haadsa na hota, toh shayad Rita pitaji ke saath aisa rishta kabool na karti.
“Rita, nahi nahi, maine kabhi nahi socha ki tum Sameer ko chhodo, na hi maine kabhi socha ki main tumse shadi karunga. Main sachmein aisa nahi sochta, tum mere saath… main toh pehle hi khush hoon, mujhe apne dil mein bojh mehsoos hota hai…” Rita ki baat sunte hi pitaji ghabrahat mein uthne lage, paseene se tar-batar hokar safai dene lage.
Computer ke saamne baitha main yeh sab dekh raha tha, mujhe thodi si rehem aayi. Rita ka maksad tha pitaji ke dil ko poora khol dena, unhe apna dil kholkar sab kuch batane ke liye majboor karna. Lekin agar zyada zor diya toh pitaji, jo abhi poori tarah theek nahi hue, unhe kuch ho gaya toh? Is waqt main sochne laga ki kya Rita ko phone karke “galti se” in dono ki baat ko rok doon…
“Papa, ghabrao mat, main sab samajhti hoon. Yeh sab shayad bhagwan ne likha ho, toh ise ek alag si kismat hi samajh lo. Jo ho gaya, ab usse bhaag kar kya hum pehle wale waqt mein wapas ja sakte hain? Tumne mujhe…” Rita yeh bolte hue akhir mein ek lambi saans li. Us raat ki yaad ab bhi uske dil mein taazi thi, lekin usi raat usne apni aakhri seema bhi tod di thi, apne pyar aur wafadari ko poora dhoka diya tha, apne pati ke saath bhi, aur us waqt uska dil tootne ke kagaar par tha.
Shayad mehsoos hua ki mahaul thoda bhari ho gaya tha. “Hehe,” Rita achanak has padi, uski hasi bilkul sachi aur khuli hui thi, jaise woh us raat ke saaye se poori tarah nikal chuki ho. Lekin haste-haste uski aankhon mein aansu aa gaye. Pata nahi woh zyada hasne ki wajah se the ya uske dil mein ab bhi thodi si sharmindagi aur dard baaki tha.
Pitaji ke “zinda hone” ke baad, Rita hamesha khush dikhayi di. Aakhir pitaji ka hosh mein aana uske liye sabse badi khushi thi. Lekin jab woh sachmein hosh mein aaye pitaji ke saamne aayi, aur apne wade ko yaad kiya, toh apne pati ke baare mein sochkar uska dil thoda uljha hua tha.
Lekin itna sab kuch hone ke baad, Rita ke dil mein pitaji ke liye koi gila-shikwa nahi bacha tha. Pitaji ne jo kuch kiya, usne Rita ke dil ko chhoo liya, uski manzil ko tod diya. Aur galti ka ilzaam sirf pitaji par nahi daala ja sakta. Rita ek nek dil aurat thi, pitaji ke jazbaat ko woh kaise nahi samajh sakti thi? Chahe kitna hi thanda dil ho, pitaji ke is pyar se woh pighal hi jati. Aur maine bhi jaan-bujhkar un dono ko ek “maafi ka tamga” de diya tha.
“Theek hai, papa, abhi toh bahut waqt hai. Tum apna dhyan rakho, apna jism theek karo, baaki baatein… hum aage chal kar dekhte hain.” Rita ne apni hasi rok li, pitaji se muh pherkar apni aankhon ke aansu pochhe, aur muskurate hue ek bowl leke kamre se bahar chali gayi. Pitaji akele bistar par pade reh gaye.
Pitaji abhi bhi is sab se ubhar nahi paye the. Unke chehre par yakin nahi ho raha tha, na hi woh kuch samajh pa rahe the. Aakhir mein, unki saari uljhan ek lambi saans mein badal gayi. Main jaanta hoon, pitaji ka “dobar zindagi” unke liye ek anapekshit baat thi. Unhe laga tha woh shayad hamesha ke liye chutkara pa lenge, lekin yamdoot ne unhe wapas bhej diya. Ab dobara zinda pitaji ek gehri uljhan mein hain, ki kya chunein aur kya chhodein.
Ek taraf, pitaji ko Rita se behad pyar hai, woh Rita ke liye apni jaan bhi de sakte hain, unka pyar kitna gehra hai yeh saaf dikhayi deta hai. Dusri taraf, pitaji mujhse bhi utna hi pyar karte hain, bachpan se lekar ab tak, unhone mere liye kya nahi kiya, yeh lafzon mein bayaan nahi ho sakta. In dono ke beech, woh kya chunein?
Rita kitchen mein bartan saaf karne lagi, phir living room sambhalne lagi. Ek ghanta aise hi beet gaya, ab shaam ke teen baje se zyada ho chuke the. Thodi der mein Rita shayad mere liye khana banane lagegi.
Office mein ab bhi sannata tha, mere liye aisi shanti bahut kam milti hai. Monitor ki screen par sab shant ho chuka tha, main gehri soch mein doob gaya. Rita aur pitaji ne apne dil ki baat khol di thi. Rita ne pehal ki, jabki pitaji bas sunte rahe. Yeh baat chhoti si thi, par isme un dono ke rishte ka sara ras tha.
Sach kahu, is waqt mein main apne dil se bhaag raha tha. Main apne dil ke us zakhm ko chhuna nahi chahta tha, jo us raat hospital mein bana tha. Main Rita ki woh baatein yaad nahi karna chahta, jo usne pitaji ke liye boli thi. Mujhe nahi pata ki Rita ki kitni baatein dil se thi, aur kitni sirf pitaji ko hosh mein laane ke liye jhooth thi. Lekin ek baat mujhe yakeen hai, jab hum dono vacation par the aur chudai kar rahe the, jab Rita ko charam sukh milta tha, tab uske dil mein pitaji hi the. Kyunki Rita ke saath meri chudai hamesha ek hi tarah hoti thi, na koi naya andaaz, na koi lambi chudai. Rita ko kabhi-kabhi hi charam sukh milta tha, aur woh bhi pitaji ki wajah se, yeh baat mujhe ab saaf pata hai…
Rita ki ek baat mujhe aaj bhi yaad hai: “Us waqt agar tum thodi der aur ruk jaate, main har roz sochti thi, apne aap ko himmat deti thi, aur akhir mein maine faisla kar liya tha ki main tumhe apni choot de doongi. Agar tum thodi der aur rukte, toh main khud hi apne aap ko rok nahi pati aur tumhe de deti…”
Kya yeh baat sach thi? Main toh sochta tha ki agar maine dawai nahi di hoti, toh Rita hamesha apni seema mein rehti, kabhi tooti nahi. Ab mujhe ehsaas hua ki main Rita ke dil ko sahi se samajh hi nahi paya. Agar maine dawai na di hoti, toh kya yeh kahani ka akhir alag hota? Afsos, waqt wapas nahi ja sakta. Apne dil ko thodi rahat dene ke liye, maine socha ki filhal in baaton ko jhooth maan loon.
Kya mujhe Rita aur pitaji ke liye dobara koi mauka banana chahiye? Haan, jab pitaji behosh the, maine apne dil ko kholne ka faisla kiya tha, ki ab na dil mein koi jalan hogi, na koi gussa. Lekin jab sachmein yeh pal dobara aaya, toh kya main apne dil par kaboo rakh paunga? Woh roshni bhari chudai ka maza, woh dil mein uthne wali jalan aur dard ka milan, yahi toh mujhe uttejit karta hai, hai na?
Chhodo, pitaji ab hosh mein aa gaye hain, yeh meri is waqt ki sabse badi khushi hai. Ise pitaji ke naye janam ka tohfa samajh lo. Pitaji ka jism theek ho raha hai, toh kyun na Rita pitaji ke dil ko bhi thodi si dawai de de?
Maine faisla kiya ki main Rita aur pitaji ke liye ek aur mauka banaunga. Lekin yeh mauka kaise banaya jaye? Tabhi mere dimaag mein ek idea aaya—kyun na aaj hi raat ko yeh kar doon? Jab Rita aur pitaji ne abhi-abhi apne dil ki baat ki hai, jab Rita ka dil mazboot hai aur pitaji abhi bhi uljhan mein hain, toh kyun na aaj hi try kiya jaye? Main dil mein ek ajeeb si uttejana aur uljhan ke saath phone uthaya aur Rita ko call kiya…
“Jaan, kya hua?” Screen par Rita ne apne haath ka jhadoo rakha aur phone uthaya, doosre haath se maathe ki lattein thik ki.
“Aaj raat mujhe office mein kaam ke liye rukna padega, aaj ghar nahi aaunga. Papa ke bimar hone ke waqt kaam kaafi bacha hua hai, ab jab papa ghar aa gaye hain, toh main yeh saara kaam nipta doonga. Tum ghar par papa ka dhyan rakho, koi bhi baat ho toh mujhe phone karna.” Meri awaaz utni khuli nahi thi jitna maine socha tha, maine koshish ki ki shant rahu, par mera kaanpta haath bata raha tha ki mera dil kitna uljha hua tha.
“Aaj raat overtime? Umm… theek hai, jaldi aaram karna, zyada der tak mat kaam karna. Kya main tere liye khana la doon? Aaj raat main teri pasand ki sauerkraut fish banane wali thi,” Rita ne suna ki mujhe overtime karna hai, toh thodi hairan hui. Waise toh mera overtime karna normal hai, par aaj raat ka yeh overtime thoda zyada “itifaq” sa laga, isliye woh thodi chaunk gayi. Phir bhi usne mujhe pyar se yaad kiya.
“Khana laane ki zarurat nahi, aaj raat main akela nahi hoon, colleagues ke saath bahar kha loonga. Ab kaam shuru karna hai, bye, meri jaan.” Main Rita se zyada baat nahi karna chahta tha. Jab faisla kar liya, toh ab koi der nahi karni chahiye. Agar Rita ki pyar bhari baatein aur sunta, toh shayad mera dil ruk jata aur aaj raat ka plan toot jata.
“Hmm, jaan, bye, mwah…” Papa ke theek hone ke baad Rita ka mood bilkul normal ho gaya tha, balki pehle se bhi behtar. Aakhir mein usne mujhe pyar se chheda bhi.
Phone band karte hi, meri nazar computer screen par chipak gayi. Aaj raat kya hoga? Agar aaj raat kuch nahi hua, toh kya meri yeh raat yun hi barbad ho jayegi? Main screen par Rita ke chehre ko dekhta raha, main ghar par nahi hoon, itna achha mauka hai, kya Rita khush hogi?
Phone band karne ke baad, Rita ke chehre par koi khushi nahi dikhayi di, balki thodi si naraazgi se usne ek saans li. Shayad isliye ki aaj raat ka family dinner toot gaya. Rita ne dobara ghar sambhalna shuru kiya, uske chhote se muh se pata nahi kya-kya bol raha tha.
Ghar sambhalte waqt, Rita ki nazar achanak pitaji ke kamre ki taraf gayi. Uski nazar wahi ruk gayi, woh pitaji ke darwaze ko ghoorne lagi. Pata nahi uske dimaag mein kya chal raha tha, uski nazar pitaji ke kamre ke darwaze par tiki hui thi, uski bhaun thodi si sikud gayi, woh living room ke beech mein khadi thi, uske chehre par hazaar bhav badal rahe the, uski aankhon mein jhijhak aur ek halki si ummeed thi, jo lambi der tak nahi gayi…