uttejit tha ki jaldi hi mera nikal gaya.
Main Hitesh. Bachpan se main apna Nana Nani aur Maa ke sath reh ke bada hua. Father na rehne ke karan mera Nana Nani kabhi kami nahi chhodi pyar aur support dene mein. Maa hamesha aapni mamta aur pyar se mujhe palan kiya. Nana ke pass paisa hone ke karan mujhe kabhi kuchh bhi cheez ka kami mehsus karne nahi dia. Main aise hi tej student tha. Iss liye sab log mujhe pyar hi pyar deta tha. Main badmasi bhi karta tha. But itna nahi jo ki bigde bachche karte hai. Chhota mota sararati karkat woh apni tarike se maaf kiya kar deta tha. But haan...mujhe hamesha achcha values aur morality ke sath ki pala woh log. Bahar zada logon ke sath mera dosti bhi nahi tha. Nana nani aur maa sab mera dost bhi tha. Aur teacher bhi. Dat ta bhi tha . Fir shikha ta bhi tha. Hum charon ek bonding se badha rehta tha bachpan se...yehi dekhte aya. Maine yeh suna ki mera pitaji gujar jane ke kuchh saal baad , mera nana nani mera maa ka dobara shadi karwa neke liye kosish kiya tha. Tab mera maa 23-24 saal ki thi. bahut sundar dekhne mein thi. Slim aur gori. Lambe baal tha unka. Paan ka patte jaisa muh ka shape. Unka aankh , eye brows , naak, hoth sab koi artist ka bana hua lagta hai. Barvi class tak padhi hai. Uske baad zindegi mein hadsa aur baad mein mujhe dekh bhal karke bada karne mein jut gaye. Mera koi mama aur mausi nahi. So nana nani ko wohi dekh bhal karte the. Ghar ka kaam bhi karte the , fir mujhe padhate bhi the aur time milta toh woh bade bade lekhak ke novel story padne mein ustad the. Ek beti hone ke karan nana nani bhi unko ghar mein rehne ka sab bando bast kar diya tha. Unko bhi book padne ka nasha lag gaya bachpan se. Baad mein woh ek hi cee tha jo woh apni khud ke liye ,apni mann ka khushi ke liye karti thi. Mera nani bhi itna old nahi the. But mera maa mera pitaji ka family nahi hone ke karan apna beta leke nana nani ka family ko hi apna family soch ke sab dekh bhal karti thi. Shayad uss mein unko khushi milti thi aur waqt bhi gujar ne ka tarika mila tha. Woh shant swabhav ki thi but hasi ka baton se hasta bhi tha aur tv mein dukh dard bhari film dekhke maus bhi ho jata tha. Kuchh log nana ji ke pass unko shadi karne ke liye proposal bhi laya tha. But kuchh mera nana ji..aur baki mera maa cancel kar diya. Starting mein nana nani maa se gussa karta tha . Maa ka jed ke liye woh bolte the ki sara zindagi padi hai tera, kaise gujaregi. Aur yeh bhi kehte the ki hitesh ko bhi to ek baap paane ka ichcha hota hoga. Baap ka pyar. But maa ka kehna tha ki agar woh kisi ko fir se shadi kiya toh woh admi apna adhikar dikhake mujhe tyag karne ko kahega aur nana nani ko chhod ke bhi jane liye kahega. Aab iss situation pe woh unke liye sambhab nahi tha. Woh mujh se dur nahi reh sakta , nahi ki nana nani ko akele chhodke aur kisi family mein jake apna grihsthi kar sakta tha. Maa ne mera muh dekh ke unka sab sukh khushi bisarjan dene ka faisla kiya tha. Nana nani dheere dheere unka baat maan ne laga , but andar hi andar future ko leke pareshan tha.
Issi beech main bada hote raha. Nana nani ko main bahut bahut pyar karta tha. Un logon se dur nahi reh pata main. Woh log mera duniya ban chuki thi. Sabse zada pyar karta tha maa ko. Unka sab kuchh mujhe bahut achcha lagta tha. Woh jo kahe, jo kare, jo khana banaye, jo kapda kharide mere liye..sab ...sab kuch mujhe achcha lagta tha. Itni achchi hone ke baad bhi unko zindagi bahut kuchh diya nahi. Fir kuchh cheez deke fir le bhi liya. Hamare sab ka khayal rakhna, sab ka jimmedari uthana mujhe unke liye ek adbhut pyar ata tha mann mein. Main kabhi unko dukh na dene ka kasam khaya tha mann mein.
Nana nani mujhe hamesha 'tum' kehke bulate the. Maa bhi. Lekin main nana nani ko 'aap' kehke baat karta tha. But maa ko hamesha 'tum' hi kehta tha. Hum sab ke beech ek bonding tha. Nana ka ghar kafi bada tha. Nana nani ek bada sa room mein rehte the. Main maa ke sath rehta tha dusri ek badi kamre mein. Ghar mein aur bhi teen room hai. Jo khali pada hai. Saman hai. But main jaise jaise bada hote raha mera ek study room bana. Fir main akela sone laga . Mera nana ek din ek room saaf safai karke khali rema stury ka saman aur ek bed laga ke woh room mera naam kar diya. Main bahut khush tha. Akhin mera bhi ek identity ban raha hai. Main ek individual bhi ban raha tha. yeh soch ke achcha lagta tha.
Main school mein kuchh dosti banaya tha. Dhere dhere main adolation period mein aya. Sex ke bare mein janna, opposite sex ke proti akrist hona...sab baki ladkon ke jaisa feel karne lagta tha. Un doston se main masturbate ke baare mein janne laga. Akela ek room milne ke karan main raat ko ekdin masturbate try kiya. But dar laga. Agar kisi ko pata chale toh. Sab kuchh socha, fir bhi uss din try kiya aur anadi jaisa karke khatam kiya. Mujhe itna achcha feel nahi hua. But haan..ek ajeeb khushi ka ek feelings se man bhar gaya tha. Kuchh din baad fir kiya. But same halat tha. Jab yeh baat ek dost ne suna usne mujhe ek book diya. Karreb ek mahina ho chuka pehla masturbate ke baad. Uss din badi dar dar ke woh kitab chhupake ghar laya aur intezar karte raha raat ka. Sab so jane ke baad main kuchh naya mehsus karne ka uttejana mein kaap raha tha. Har din ke tarah maa sote time aake dudh ka glass diya aur bistar thik karke mere pass aya. Main table mein pad raha tha. Unhone mera sar ke balon mein hath firaya pyar se main unko dekha aur woh muskurake good night bolke chali gayi. Har roj mujhe iss pal bahut khushi aur ma ka prati pyar ata hai. But aaj ek ajeeb uttejana mera sarir mein tha. Main intezar kar raha tha kab woh jaye aur main room lock karoon. Woh jane ke Thoda der baad main room lock kiya aur woh kitab nikala. Kitab kholtehi mera muh khula ka khula reh gaya. Woh ek pictures bhari book hai. Sex karte huye admi aur aurat ka pictures. Sab foreigners hai. Pehli baar yeh sab dekh ke itna
Aise kuch din clata raha aur alag alag kitab milta raha. Lekin woh itna raw tha aur ek abdhut duniya tha ki woh cheez se mann hatne laga. Fir dheere dheere ek ajeeb tarika se mann uttejit hona chalu kiya. Raste mein koi ladki dekhke ya bas mein baithi koi ladki ka face dekh ke raat mein woh sochta tha aur masturbate karta tha. Aisa karne mein mann mein ek alag khushi mehsus hota tha. Jaise ki koi apna sahar ki ladki, apna jaisa atmosphere mein bada hua ek ladki ka sarir soch ke aur uske sath milan ka drisya kalpana karke mera kaam chalta tha. Sochta tha ki ekdin aisehi ek ladki mera biwi banegi aur uske sath main mann bhar ke sex karoonga.
Yeh sab ke baad bhi mera padhai mein koi kami nahi tha. Main achche result karke age badte raha. Ek sunday. Main ghar mein tha. Nana nani ke sath waqt bita raha tha. Maa ghar ka kaam kaaj ke lage huye the. Nani bhi ma ko help kar raha tha. Main yehi sab dekh raha tha sofe mein baithke ek sports magazine hath mein leke. Uss din kya pata kyun, main ajeeb nazron se maa ko dekha. Shayad yeh mera itna mahinon ka harkaton ka phal tha. But main jab unka gardan hila hila ke nani se baat karte huye dekha tab main unka kandha dekhke mann ajeeb nasha mein boond hone laga. Fir unka blouse aur saree ke beech ka pet nazar aya. Mera nasha lag gaya tha. Achanak woh bathroom se pair dhoke ke nikle. Saree thoda upar karke pakde the. Mujhe unka heels ke upar se ungli tak puri pair nazar aya. Sundar golgol heels hai aur sundar ungliyan. Ekdum light color ka nail polish laga hua hai. Main unka face nahi dekha. Bas yeh sab dekh ke nasha ho gaya..
Uss raat main jab masturbate kiya mujhe khali woh sab cheez nazar ke samne aya. Main bahut time leke ek ajeeb adbhut naye feelings ke sath ejaculate kiya. Aisa aaj tak nahi hua. Mujhe orgasm ke sath jo satisfaction mila woh life mein pehli baar feel hua. Uss raat ek gehri need aya.
Main hamesha ek difference dekha. Mera baki doston ki maa ke sath mera maa ka bahut antar hai. Woh log ek bhari bharkam maa maa jaisa hota tha, but mera maa un logon ka chhoti behen ya beti jaise lagti thi. Ek to umar bahut kam hai. Sath mein woh dekhne mein bahut sundar thi. Unko raste mein college jate huye aur ladion ki tarah lagta tha. But kisko malum ki unka mere jaisa ek beta hai aur unki zindagi mein ek bhayanak hadsa ho chuka hai..
