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ICU me pade us bejaan se vajood ko dekhar mere man me saikdo sawaal uth rhe hain... kaun hai iska jimmedar.......ye samaaj ?...hum aur aap??... ye system...?...kaun???.....Mai Raghav Chaterjee , peshe se ek school master hu.....Gaya (Bihar) ke ek chhote se gaon ke primary school me pichhle 30 saal se bachchon ko padhata hu......is samay subah ke 10 baj rhe hain aur mai kota (Raj) me ek Hospital ke emergency ward ke bahar baitha hu...ICU me jo shakhs leta hai ,wo mera hi ek student hai..Sanjeev....mere sabse honhaar students me se ek.
Kuchh samjh nhi paa rha hu.....Kya galat ho rha hai ki itni si umr me aaj ka yuva itni ghor nirasha me doobta jaa rha hai....sabkuchh hote huye bhi wo kyun akela hota jaa rha hai..kuchh to galat ho rha hai...par ho sakta hai mai is nayi peedhi ko nhi samjh pa rha hu.....ek generation gap hai..
"kaha hai mera Sanjeev...??"..ek lady roti huyi huyi isi or chali aa rhi hain...Gaurds ne unhe ICU ke bahar hi rok diya...shayad ye sanjeev ki maa hain...unke thik pichche ek sajjan hain..jo lagatar unhe samjhane ki kosis kar rhe hain..aur aad me apne aansu bhi ponch le rhe hain...ye Sanjeev ke pita jee hain...mai whi unse thodi door par baitha kabhi un dono ki or dekh rha hu aur kabhi ICU ke us paar , unki toot’ti "ummeed" ko...
Sanjeev hamare poore distict me first aaya tha us saal..aur uske turant baad yha taiyari karne aa gya....uska man tha ya nhi,mujhe nhi pata..lekin aksar kahata tha
"sir papa chahte hain ki mai IIT pass karu..."..mai kuchh jyada nhi kahta..kyuki ye hamare bharat ki sanksriti me hai...har baap apne sapne apne bete ki aankho se dekhta hai...mere khyaal me 2 saal ho gaye the use yha aaye.
Phone par kabhi kabhi us se baat hoti thi...mai usse puchhta - kaisi chal rhi taiyari...wo uljha sa jawab deta- “Sir, English me padhaate hain sab kuch..thodi dikkat hoti hai..par mai kosis kar rha hu.”...mai bhi samajh sakta tha...ek gaon ka padhaa likha ladka,chahe kaisa bhi I.Q rakhta ho..thodi paresani to hogi use jab kisi All India competiton me jaayega ..khaskar medium ko lekar...aajkal sabkuch English me hi padhate hain, bade Coaching me.
Apne hi ek jaroori kaam se mai kota aaya tha.... 3 din pahle yhi kota me hi mila tha mai sanjeev se.....usne bataya ki 1-2 din me result aane wala hai....maine use Aashirwaad diya aur All the best kaha....wo paresan tha, mujhe lag to rha tha..par result ki tension kise nhi hoti...mai Sanjeev ki manah sthiti ko samajh nhi saka.
Shaam ke koi 9 baje the,mai train par baith chuka tha ghar wapas aane ke liye tabhi mujhe sanjeev ke phone se call aayi...shayad call list me number dekhakr kisi ne call kiya tha....aur uske baad kal raat se mai yhi hospital me uske saath hu...
Haan, ek ladki hai..jo mere aane se pahle se yha thi..aur wo bhi tabse yhi padi huyi hai...shayad is waqt washroom me hai...aane ke baad se lagatar ro rhi hai......puchha maine par kuchh thik thik bataya nhi usne..shayad "dost" hai sanjeev ki...
Sanjeev ke mummy papa kabhi Dotcors ke aage hath jod rhe hain to kabhi tasbeeh ke daane lekar dua kar rhe hain...dawa ya dua,kuchh kaam kar jaaye..Sanjeev wapas laut aaye...Aur mai.....!!!....mai whi atka hu abhi tak...kaun hai iska jimmedar...??..kusoor kiska hai ???.
Wo ladki washroom se bahar nikali aur aakar mere bagal me baith gayi.... raat bhar jaagne aur rone se aankhe ekdam laal ho rhi hain uski ....use dekhkar Sanjeev ki mummy uski or chali aayi.....
"tum...tum kaun ho beta....??"
"Sanju ki classmate..."ladki ne rundhe gale se kaha..
"mera Sanjeev thik ho jaayega na......"Sanju ki maa ne badi aas se puchha...jawab me ladki ke aankho se aansu nikal gaye aur usne dheere se haan me sar hila diya..
"Master sahab aap yha...?" sanjeev ke papa bhi aa gaye...
"jee..kuchh kaam se aaya tha yhaa......kl sanjeev se baat huyi thi meri....to
shayad ye sab hone par kisi ne uske phone me mera number dekh call laga diya...mai yhi tha to aa gyaa..."..maine sanchhipt sa jawab diya.
"aap le aaye use yha...??"
"nhi..mai railway station se seedha hospital aaya..coaching ke kuch log aur ye ladki saath the us samay......Peehu naam hai iska...sanjeev ki classmate hai...."
“hme kal sham ko phone aaya...bataya ki sanjeev ne.......” Sanjeev ke papa ka gala bhar aaya...
“kisi tarah intjaam karke flight ka ticket karwaya....ye kya kar liya isne...?...”
Mai kuchh nhi bola...
Sanjeev ki mummy ro rhi thi....hum sab chup the....kuchh kahne ko nhi bacha tha...subah ke 11 baj gaye the.... kisi ne kuchh nhi khaya tha...us chhoti si ladki par taras aaya mujhe...
"kuchh kha lo bahar jakar.." maine kaha, wo kuchh nhi boli aur sar jhukaye baithi rahi..maine fir kuchh nhi kaha....thodi der baad mai hi use bahaana karke bahar le aaya....
"mujhe sar dard ho rha hai , chalo bahar jara chai pee lete hain...".....wo chuchap chalne lagi, mai uske pichhe aa gya.
hospital ke pichhe ki or lagbhag aadhe kilometre ki doori par ek tapari thi..hum udhar hi chal diye...
maine jabrdasti karke chai aur biscuit ka ek packet use bhi thama diya aur khud bhi chai lekar saamne rakhe bench par baith gya....bahut kahne par us ladki ne 4-5 biscuit khaye aur chay pee...maine use ek aur chay dila di..aur khud bhi le li...
"kuchh bata sakti ho....kal kya hua tha..."badi himmat jutakar maine kaha....vaise to coaching walo ne bataya tha ki result negative aane se depression me suicide attempt kiya hai sanjeev ne, par mai uske muh se sun na chah rha tha...
"kal sham ko 7 baje result aaya....result ke pahle hostel ka mohol bahut tensed ho jata h...last year jinka nhi hua hota wo to aur bhi tension m hote hain...last attempt hota h......"
"hmm...Sanjeev ka bhi nhi hua tha pichhle saal.....fir???." maine ek sip li aur use bhi chay peene ko kaha..
"jee......result ka pata chalte hi maine Sanju ko call kiya..usne phone nhi
uthaya...fir maine kayi baar call kiya..par usne phone nhi uthaya...mai bhagti huyi uske hostel pahuchi..wo apne room me baitha ro rha tha." itna kahte kahte wo ladki rone lagi...kuchh der baad wo chup huyi , par mujh me himmat nhi thi kuchh aur puchhne ki..thodi der wo nhi boli ,fir bataane lagi...
"maine usko chup karane ki bahut kosis ki...wo mujhse kuchh baat bhi nhi kar rha tha...bas roye jaa rha tha...fir thodi der baad wo bola - "Peehu, nhi hua yaar " ..aur mere gale lag kar jor jor se rone laga...maine use bahut samjhaya...lagbhag 2 ghante tak mai uske saath rahi..usko bola bhi ki abhi mere saamne papa ko call kr do..par usne saaf mana kar diya...aur mujhe bhi jaane ko bol diya..."
"maine mana kiya par usne mujhe buri tarah se daantkar jaane ko kaha....mai chali aayi...lekin har aadhe ghante par jakar chupke se jhank aati.......is baar thoda late ho gya shayad....mai thodi jaldi jaati to shayad sanju..." wo ladki fir se rone lagi..
Maine apni chay fenk di..aur usko chup karane laga...wo mujhse lipat gayi...
“Maine kaha tha sanju se, exam to ho gaye hain...ab to bas result aana hai , ghar chale jaao......par wo nhi gaya...shayad wo nhi chahta tha ki result aaye to wo apne papa ke saamne ho....”
"Uncle, hum kosis to karte hain na...nhi hota to kya karen..”...ek aisa sawaal jo usne mujse nhi har un maa baap se kiya tha, jinke bachche aajki is andhi race me unse hi door hote jaa rhe hain.
Wo bolna suru huyi to fir bolti hi gayi....
"Papa chahte hain mai AIPMT clear karu,Sanju ke papa chahte hain wo IIT clear kar,lekin papa kabhi ye kyu nhi puchhte ki hum kya chahte hain......mummy phone karti hain to ye nhi puchhti beta khana khaya ya nhi, mummy puchhti hain beta test me number achche aaye ya nhi.....mummy kabhi nhi puchhti beta neend aati hai ki nhi, mummy puchhti hai raat me thik se padhti ho ki nhi.”
“sabkuchh chhod kar hum yha aa jate hain......is jail me....aur fir ek 3 ghante ke paper me maut aur jndagi ka faisla ho jata hai...ye galat hai na Uncle.......is se jyada keemat to honi chahiye na hamari life ki....." wo rote huye bole jaa rhi thi...
komal man ki vyatha bahar nikal rhi thi...kuchh sahi tha,kuchh galat......thodi nadani aur dher saari nirasha.....itni si umar me itni maansik peeda......ye to kahi se sahi nhi tha.
Mai badi mushkil se use chup kara kar hospital me wapas le aaya.....ek do baaar
kaha ki ab to sanjeev ke parents bhi aa gaye....tum hostel wapas chali jao....par uska whi kahna tha...jab tak sanju ko hosh nhi aayega mai nhi jaungi.Sanjeev ke parents abhi bhi whi ICU ke saamne baithe the...hum bhi bagal me jakar baith gaye.
Peehu ne bataya mujhe ki jab wo aakhiri baar sanjeev ke room me jhankne gayi to wo bistar par ulta pada tha, darwaze ki kundi andar se band thi aur uske muh se jhaag nikal rhi thi....wo rone lagi aur usne daudkar warden ko bulaya aur fir sablog use lekar yha hospital me aa gaye...
Sanjeev ke kamre se suicide note mila tha....jo us police inspector ke paas tha.... Inspector ne peehu ko dikhaya tha ki handwriting Sanjeev ki hi hai na... Peehu ne letter poora nhi padha, wo padh hi nhi saki.....haan,ye bata diya ki hadwriting Sanjeev ki hi hai.
Maine bhi usi samay ek nazar us letter par dali.......mushkil se 4-5 line likha tha....
"Papa , maaf kar dijiyega.......mai aapka achcha beta nhi hun.......mujhse nhi ho paya...sorry papa.....mummy aapki bahut yaad aa rhi hai....roj aati hai...mummy , mai jaa rha hu...mujhe maaf kar dijiyega...peehu tum mujhe bahut achchhi lagti ho, I love you...kash mai tumhe kabhi bol pata.....maaf kar dena mujhe...
I m Sorry Papa..... I Quit..."
letter nhi bas ek note tha wo..suicide note...wo sab baaten jo wo kahna chahta tha..lekin jeete jee shayad kah nhi pata..
Mera man bahut bhari ho rha tha....shiksha ka uddeshya to jeevan ko ek nyi disha dena hota hai, lekin ye kaun sa rasta hai jo maut ki or lekar jaa rha hai... IIT Route..!!!... man me yhi ek sabd aa rha tha......nhi, is IIT Route ka matlab sirf IIT se nhi hai.......ye IIT Route to ek jaal hai ,andhi prtispardha ka jaal... jisme har wo masoom fans rha hai jikse apne use is Route par akela chhod dete hain...ye wo Route hai jo sapne to khubsoorat bhayisya ke dikhata hai , lekin le jata maut ki gahri neend ki or hai...
Apne vicharo ke bhawar me uljha mai chupchap sar jhukaye us bench par baitha
hu..Dr abhi abhi ICU se bahar nikle hain.....sab log ro rhe hain....chhoti si Peehu ki sooni aankhe mujhe dukh de rhi hain........Sanjeev hmesa ke liye jaa chuka hai,.. ye IIT Route mere Sanjeev ko nigal gaya hai, aur naa jane kitno ko nigal jaayega.
Mai ghar waapsi ke liye train me baitha hu..man bahut dukhi hai.....
Wo sukukmar komal man, jise is khubsooarat duniya ke rango se khelne ka har hak hai, ek samajik kuntha ka shikar ho dam tod rha hai.......kyon inka koi apna inse nhi kahta ki ye IIT Route sirf ek rasta hai, eklauta rasta nhi... sirf ek chhota sa sapna hai,sapno ka ant nhi.......ye IIT Route zindagi me ek chhota sa padav hai, poori zindagi nhi.
Peehu ka wo sawaal , “Uncle hum kosis to karte hain na, kya karen nhi hota to...”..mere paas iska koi jawab nhi h, kyuki iska jawab sirf uske wo apne de sakte hain jinke liye wo is IIT Route par chal rhi hai.
Meri is kahani ko lagbhag 10 saal ho gaye the.....maine ek chhota sa NGO suru kiya ,naam tha IIT Route...is kahani ko ek documentry ka roop diya gaya.... students ko moral support karne ke liye pradesh sarkar ne ek students anti-suicide cell suru kiya ...kayi saari coaching me bhi anti-suicide cell banayi gayi thi..
mai apne star par prayas karta raha.....lekin sanjeev ka wo nistej chehra aur us Peehu ki wo udaas aankhe, man me ek ghaav kar gayi thi..kuchh ghav waqt ke saath bharte nahi , aur gahre ho jaate hain... waqt beet’ta gaya....mera swasthya thik nhi rahta tha....maine ab school jana band kar diya tha.
Aaj 82 saal ki umar me ek govt hospital me pada mai shayad apni antim saanse gin rha hu....kisi specialist surgeon ko bulaya gya hai....bypass surgery karni hai......aisa hi kuchh doctor kah rhe the mere bete se..
“Sir ”
Kaano me ye aawaz padi.... mere muh se aawaz nhi nikal paa rhi ...seene me tej dard ho rha...badi mushkil se jor dekar aankhe kholi.....Saamne ek lady doctor khadi thi..
“IIT Route se mai bach gayi thi sir...papa dusre din hi aakar mujhe le gaye the
wha se..” bade utsaah se kah rhi thi wo...
Mere hotho par halki si muskaan aa gayi aur aankho me thoda sa pani.....mujhe yaad aa rha tha...Kota se aate samay maine peehu se uske papa ka number liya tha....
Maine unse nivedan kiya tha ki wo aakar peehu ko le jaayen,
“Uski kismat me jo ban’na hoga wo ban jaayegi lekin ye IIT Route, ye ek din use bhi nigal jaayega.......apne bachcho ko Sapne dekhne ki aajadi dijiye , unhe khud se door mat kijiye....jaane kitne sanju aur peehu apno se door hokar bahut door chale jaate hain....jab unhe hamari jarurat hoti hai to hum unke paas nhi hote....wo paas ho jaayen to hum bahut khus hote hain, lekin agar wo fail ho jaayen to..???.... kya zindagi khatm hai unki..??...nhi na....”
“Jo mummy papa kal tak jis sanju ke liye sabkuchh hote the, aaj whi Sanju un mummy papa se apni nakaami kahne ki himmat nhi kar paata...mummy papa se dar lagne lagta hai use.....kyuki ye IIT Route hme hamaare apno se alag kar raha hai...akela kar rha hai....please Peehu ko is IIT Route se bacha lijiye...aakar use yha se le jaaiye...”..
Bas yhi kaha tha maine .
Maine peehu ko dekha aur sukoon se aankhe band kar li...Mujhe khusi thi , ek peehu ko mai bacha paya...
Operation theatre ki lights jal gayi hai..... mujhe injection diya jaa rha hai...Peehu ne vishwaas ke saath mere haatho ko dheere se dbaa diya...sabkuchh thik hoga,shayad yhi khana chah rhi ha...mujhe yakeen hai sab kuchh thik hoga...... mai nahi bhi rha to koi gam nhi....umeed hai ye suruwat bahut door tak jaayegi...ye IIT Route jarur band hoga...
“ Manu??!!” darwaaze par do baar dastak huyi aur fir mummi ki aawaz sunayi di .. aankhen band karte huye bistar se uth gaya ..
“haan mummy..aataa hun das minute me” Manu ne kaha. Saai raat aankho me beeti thi ! kitna mushkil hota hai ye dikhana ki aap thik hain !
“beta, sab thik hai na??” Mummi ki aawaz me fikr thi..
“haan mamma..aap chalo mai aaya..” Maine kaha!
Mummy kuchh der khadi rahi fir wapas chal di. Manu, usaki mummy aur dadi..bas teen lag rahte the is 4 kamre ke ghar me. Rajsthan ke Jaipur city se koi 25 kilomtre paschim me tha unka gaaon..ab to gaon nahi town-area ho gaya tha. Kuchh din tak pahale is ghar me ek chautha sadasy bhi tha..poonam ! Manu ki badi bahan, lekin 3 mahine pahale hi usaki shadi ho gayi thi aur wo apne pati ke saath banglore chali gayi thi !
Mummy aakar daadi ke paas baith gayi jo ek thaali me matar chheel rahi thi !
“kuchh batata bhi nahi , kaisa bujhaa bujhaa sa rahane laga hai…kya karun mai is ladake ka..” Mummy dadi ke paas khaat pe baithate huye boli !
“shaadi kar de isaki..kab se to kah rahi hun..”daadi ke paas har problem ka readymade solution hota tha. Jab se poonam gayi hai tabase hi udaas rah rahaa hai na..biwi aa jayegi to bas dekhna fir” daadi ne bade chaav se muskuraate huye kaha ! lekin mummy ke chehare pe abhi bhi paresaan jhalak rahi thi !
“ poonam ke jaane ka asar to us pe pada hi hai, dono me jaan basati thi ek dusare ki ..ab shadi bhi kaise kar dun..ek baar bhi haan nahi kahata..”Mummy ne kaha !
“are thode na wo kahega meri shaadi kar do ….ladake to kahte hi hain nahi karana..” daadi ko na samjhana aasana tha na harana.
Mummy chup ho gayi aur matar chheelane lagi !
15 min beete honge aur Manu aakar unake paas baith gaya..wo poora taiyar hokar aaya tha ..office jaane ke liye.
“kaha jaa raha hai..” Daadi ne ghurate huye kaha !
“office daadi..”Manu ne kaha !
“hainnnnnn? Aaj itwaar hai ..” daadi ne aankh tedh karte huye kaha
“Manu ! beta baith ..naashta to kar le..”
“haan maa, le aao” manu paas chair pe baith gaya ! Mummy ne pyar se apne bête ko dekha aur andar chali gayi !
“oye ladake.. ab bata..ye itwaar ko kabse aafis chalane laga..ab kya muye itwaar ko bhi chhutti nahi denge..”dadi ne puchha !
“haan dadi thoda kaam jyada hai..”
“ dusari naukari kar le fir..jisme 6 ghante kaam karan ho bas..ham ab teri shadi karane wale hain..” dadi ke nazar se to duniya me sabkuch kitna aasan tha !
“jee..jaldi hi chhod dunga ye naukri..”Manu kabhi bhi dadi se bahas nahi karta tha..aise me daadi ko Poona ki badi yaad aati thi, jo kabhi daadi ke saamne hathiyar nahi daalti thi jabtak daai kuchh khichkar usako maar na den !
Dadi chup ho gayi..ab to dadi ko bhi fikar hone lagi thi..unake hisab se jab koi insane unse itni aasani se haar maan le to jarur usaki tabiyat kuchh kharab hai !
Manu chupchaap nashta karane lagi Mummy use dekhati rahi ..
“jaane kya ho gaya hai mere bachchhe ko” Manu nashta karake jaa chukka tha aur mummy abhi bhi usi ke bare me soch rahi thi !
“manjari, kuch thik nahi hai yaar..aaj maa se baat ho rahi thi..Manu shayad un sab baton ko bhool nahi paa raha hai..” Poonam phone par apani best friend manjari se baat kar rahi thi !
“to tum kyu nahi baat karati Manu se..” manjari ne kaha !
“are mujhse bhi kaha baat karta hai wo..kabhi kuchh batata hi nahi..us bare me to baat hi nahi karata..” poonam bhi fikrmand thi !
“hmm..” manjari ne kaha
“sun ek help karegi meri..” poona ne kaha !
“kkyaa..”
“tu Manu se milegi..usake saath thoda time spend karegi kya ?? ..shayad use ek dost ki jarurat hai..” poonam ne kaha !
“kya kah rahi hai tu..” Manjari ne chaunkate huye kaha !
“ek din mil le us se..fir jaisa sahi lage karana..please..” poonam ne kaha !
“sorry yaar..mujhse ye sab nahi hoga..tu bhi samjah rahi hai tu kya bol rahi hai..” Manjari ne kaha !
“hmm..sorry..chal thik h ..baad me baat karate hain..”
Poonam apne bhai ke liye bahut paresan ho rahi thi ! aur idhar Manjari soch me pad gayi thi !
Maanas urf Manu ! usaka pahala pyaar !
Manjari ke dimaag me saari purani baaten chalen lagi thi..apani sabse achhii dost ke chhote bhai se pyaar kar baithi thi lekin kabhi himmat nahi kar paayi kahane ki ! Maanas thaa to Poonam se chhota lekin jimmedari saari usane bade bhai ki tarah nibhayi thi ! 12th ke baad se hi Manas Job karane laga tha…correspondence se B.A aur fir M.B.A..aaj Maanas ek kaafi bade hotel me asst. manager tha..salary thik thaak thi aur Poonam ki shaadi ki saari jimmedari bhi Maanas ne hi poori ki thi ! Manjari aksar Poonam ke saath hi college se aati thi aur kayi baar wo dono hi Manas ki bike par aati thin , kitne khubsoorat hote the wo pal !
Maanas ki sanjidagi ki deewani thi Manjari..poonam school time se usaki dost thi , ghar ke saare haalat us se bata deti thi..ghar ki arthik pareshaniyan, Papa ke liye nafarat aur dadi ke taane….usake papa ne dusari shadi kit hi aur dadi ki nazar me usaki jimmedar bhi maa tha. Kuchh bhi achchha nahi tha unaki ife me, lekin Uska bhai kisi chattan ki tarah khada raha tha aur ghar ke inhi sab halt ne use waqt se pahale sanjeeda aur bada kar diya tha. Par Manjari ne kabhi bhi Maanas ke maathe par shikan nahi dekhi thi ! Use kitne hi ladake line maarte the..itni khubsoorat thi ki jis ladake ko bol de, koi naa nahi karata lekin Maanas ne kabhi bharpoor nazar se dekha bhi nahi tha use !
Poonam ki shadi tay hone ke baad se Manas udas rahene laga tha..Manjari ne socha tha Poonam ki shaadi ke baad wo Manas ko apne dil ki baat bata degi , aur fir jo bhi kismat ka faisla ho use manjoor hoga ! lekin in sabse pahale hi ek din poonam ne use bataya.
“Manju, Manu kisi ladaki ko bahut chahata tha, wo ladaki kaun thi usane mujhe kabhi nhi bataya…bas itna kaha ha ki ek din jarur milwaunga...kal maine dekha mera bhai apne room me sisak sisak kar ro rha tha..maine bahut puchha lekin usne kuchh bataya nahi….pta nahi kya hua hai yaar..” Manjari ko poonam ki baat yaad aa rahi thi..aur ye bhi ki us raat wo khud kitna royi thi..jise chaha tha use bina paaye hi khoti jaa rahi thi ! usake baad se manjari ne kabhi Manas ko hansate nahi dekha!
Pata nahi kyun Manjari ko aisa lgta tha ki Poonam ki shadi ke baad se Manas aur jyada udaas ho gyaa tha pahale wo itna udaas hota nahi tha .
Manjari ka dimaag kuchh aur kah raha tha ,dil kuchh aur isi uded bun ke saath wo Manu ke har chal di .
Poonam ki Mummy use dekhkar bahut khush huyi ,Poonam ke jaane ke baad se Manjari unake ghar aana lagbhag chhod chuk thi .
“Poonam ki shaadi ho gayi to tune bhi hame chhod diya..? “ Mummy ne doodh me coffee daalte huye kaha aur wahi pass me kitchen ke reck par baithi manjari Manu ki talaash me aankhe nacha rahi thi .
“kuchh bolegi bhi ab ?”
“are nahi Aunty..aapne bhi to mujhe bhula diya..kabhi phone bhi nahi kiya” Manjari ne bina soche samjhe jawab diya.
“tujase to baat karana hi bekar hai..chal aaja..coffee ban gayi..” Mummy ne kaha to wo haath me cookies ka dibaas uthate huye bahar aa gayi .
Manjari Manas ko dekhna chahat thi aur koi 1 ghante ke intjaar ke baad Manu ki bike aakar ruki, Manjari ke dil ki dhadkan badh gayi, jaise koi chor ho usake man me. Manu anadr aaya, mummy ke haath me bag diya uski or dekha aur haule se muskurate huye “Hi” bola..Manjari ne bhi Hi kaha aur Manu andar chala gaya. Manjari ko Poonam ki baaten yaad aa rahi thi sachmuch kuchh gahri baat the jisne Manu ko poora ka poora badal kar rakh diya. Manjari ne bhi shiddat wala ishq kiya tha, ek pal me un aankhon ke pichhe chhupe dard ki gahrayi samjh gayi. Uske man me ek dwand abhi bhi chal raha tha. Dimaag kahta tha ki jiske dil me kisi aur ki chahat basi hai usake saath muhabbat ki duniya basaane ke sapne dekhane ka kya fayada lekin dil kahta tha – kitna udas ho gaya hai uska Manu?” aur bas dil ke is ek sawaal par dimaag ki tamaam daleelen feeki pad jaa rahi thi .
Anuty wo mujhe computer pe kuchh kaam tha ,mera laptop kharab ho gaya hai to..” manjari ne dimag lagaya Manu se akele me milane ka.
“Manu ko bula deti hun laptop de dega apana” Mummy ne kaha..
“nahi nahi..mai abhi do minute me aati hun ,desktop pe hi kar lungi..” Manjari ne kaha aur bina jawab sune andar chali gayi..Poonam ke hone par wo kitni baar hi us purane desktop par usake saath filmen dekha karati thi .
Manjari desktop ke saamne baithi sakht bore ho rahi thi..Manu apen room me tha ,aur darwaza band lag rha tha..Manjari bhi aajkuchh sochkar hi aayi thi..wo uthi aur Manu ke room ke darwaze pe dastak diya..
“aa jao Manjri” Manu ne pahchan liya tha .
“aapko kaise pata ki mai hi hun..”
“kyuki mummy aur dadi aise knock nahi karti..”
Manjri to pahle se hi kayal thi usaki..wo bed par aundhe muh leta tha, manjari table par pair latkakar baith gayi..
“batao ,kuchh kaam tha kya..?
“hainnnnnn?..mai kya yaha bina kaam ke nahi aa sakti..?”
“mere room me pahale kab aayi hi bina kaam ke..” manu ne kaha.
“haan to..bahut si chijen pahali baar hoti hain..” manjari ko aur kuchh soojha nahi..sahi hi kaha tha usne.
Manu ne kuchh nahi kaha!
“kahi ghoomne chalen..” manjari jo aamtaur pe Manu se sirf hi hello hi karti thi aaj jabrdasti ulti pulti baaten kar rahi thi .
Manu ne use dekha.. “tabiyat thik hai na tumhari..? ”
“han ekdam..kyun tum bimar ho , ghumne nahi jaa sakte..??”
Manu fir kuchh nahi bola..
“kya hua hai tumhe…?” aakhri manjari ne hathiyaar daal diya.
“matlab ?”
“aise bujhe bujhe se kyun ho…”
“nahi to..” Manu ne pahali baar gahri nazar se dekha usaki or.
“Manu ji ! duniya me aisa koi nahi hota jise kabhi sahaare ki jarurat na pade..sab insaan hi hain..” Manjari ne is baar ek thahre huye lahje me kaha aur ektak manu ko dekhati rahi..Manu bhi usaki or dekhta raha aur fir nazren jhuka lya usane.
“ aur kuchh log aise bhi hote hain jinse hum sabkuchh bata sakte hain is vishwas ke saath ke agar aap galat bhi huye to bhi wo aap ke saath khade rahenge..” Manu ne kabhi nahi socha tha ki aisi chulbuli aur chanchal si dikhani wali manjari aisi gahri baaten bhi kar sakti hai ! wo abhi bbhi chup hi raha!
Manjari thodi der baithi rahi ki shaayd Manu kuchh bole aur fir usne ek pen liya aur ek paper pe apna mob number likhkar jis table par baithi thi uski daraz me daal diya..
“meri baat sahi lagi ho to..” usane kaha aur bhari kadamo se kamre se bahar nikal gayi !
Raat ke 1 baj gaye the ..Manjari apne mobile ke seene se chipkaye har beet’te pal ke saath thodi aur udas hoti jaa rahi thi..use achchhi achchhi aur meaningful baaten karani nahi aati..aise baaten jo kisi ke dil ko chhu sake, kisi ko tasalli dila sake, apnepan ka ahsaas dila sake..tmaam khyal usake man me aa rahe the.use yakeen ho chala tha ki ab Manu call nahi karega.. ummeed ka diya bujha rha tha..lekin..usake Mobile ki thathrahat ne jaise use nayi saanse de di..jhat se call receive ki usane…lekin kuchh boli nahi..
“hello…” thodi der baad Manu ki aawaz aayi..
“hmm..jiiiii..” usane sone ka natak kiya..
“so gayi thi tum..”
“haan to”
“phone to bada jaldi utha liya..”
Manjari chup rahi,apni bevkoofi pe use gussa aane laga..use bhi pta lag gaya ki mai wait kar rahi thi phone aane ka ..huhhh !
“ jaanti ho insaan sabse jyada akela kab ho jaata hai..?” thodi der baad Manu ne kaha
Manjari ne kuchh nahi kaha..usaki saanse bevajah hi tej chalen lagi thi..
“jab us se kuchh galti ho jaati hai ya fir kuchh aisa ho jaata hai jise samaj me galat samjha jata hai -kuchh aisa jise wo accept nahi kar pata- kyuki wo baat wo kisi ko kah nahi pata..darata hai log hasenge..kya sochenge uske bare me..etc etc…” Manu ne kaha !
“jo apne hote hain wo hmesa apne hote hain, jab aap galat ho tab bhi..” Manjari ne kaha .
“hmm, lekin hum log apno ko dard nahi dete ..”
“dard bant’na dard dena nahi hota” Manjari ne kaha aur dono chup ho gaye..
“Manu, tum mujhe kah sakte ho, is yakeen ke saath ki meri soch tumhare bare me kabhi nahi badlegi..itna to jaanti hun main tumhe..” Manjari use yakeen dila rahi thi !
“ Mai poetry likhta hun, likhta tha actually, bahut sari baaten hoti thi jo kisi se kah nahi pata tha kyuki ghar me pahale se hi bahut masale the..to apni dil ki baat kaagaz pe utaar deta tha.. kuch arse ke baad ek din aise hi man kiya to youtube pe upload kar diya ek kavita..aur dheere dheere meri aadat ban gayi..bahut se log judate gaye..log pasand karate the to aisa lgta tha is duniya me meri bhi koi value hai..virtual world me hi sahi. Aur fir ek din mujhe youtube pe ek msg aaya..ek ldaki ka…hum facebook pe jude..usne bataya ki use meri poetry bahut pasand hai..hum kaafi baaten karane lage..aur kuchh dino baad usne kaha ki use mujhse muhabbat hai..mujhe achchha nahi laga aisa nahi kahunga..lekin us din mai vastvikata ki duniya me laut aaya. Maine use bata diya ki virtual world me shayad mai use kuchh bahut badi hasti lgta hun lekin real me mai kuchh nahi hun..sabkuchh bata diya use..lekin usane kaha use sirf mujhase matlab hai ,meri haisiyat ,dharm, jaat se koi fark nahi padata..”
Manu bolta jaa raha tha aur usaki aawaz bheegati jaa rahi thi , Manjari usaki aawaz me dard mahsoos karake khud bhi ruaanasa ho gayi thi .
“ fir ?”
“ fir hum bahot baaten karane lage..phone pe..aur saath jeene marane ki kasamen.. dheere dheere kuchh dino baad wo mujhe avoid karane lagi aisa mujhe lgane laga….dhaai saal tak..” Manu ruk gaya..
“ mai 10-10 baar call karata lekin koi jawab nahi aataa..fir ek din achanak usaka message aaya ki wo hamesa ke liye India chhod ke jaa rahi hai..aur mai aage se kabhi use message aur call karane ki kosis na karun..” Manu ki aawaz bharra gayi !
Manjari ekdam shaant!!
“ mai samajh gaya tha ki meri poetry ka tilism khatm ho gaya tha..use mujhse kabhi muhabbat huyi hi nahi thi, muhabbat use meri kavitaon se thi..shaayad!!...lekin mai use sach me bahut chaahane laga tha..” Manu jaise ki soch me doob gaya tha, jaise kisi aur ko yakeen dilana chah raha tha !
“hmm..fir kabhi baat huyi ?” Manjari ko dukh ho raha tha!
“ nahi..us din ke baad usaka number band aane laga…maine bahut baar call kiya, lekin..kisi bhi tarah se koi contact nahi ho paya..”
“shayad usaki koi majboori rahi ho..?” Manjari ne kaha !
"hmm..jarur rahi hogi..lekin jaanti ho?”
“kyaa..?”
“ Poonam ki shaadi me aayi thi wo, baarat ke saath” bade haule se dhamaka kiya tha Manu ne.
“whaaatttttt….???? Fir ?? mili tumse..? pahchaana usane tumhe..?? kuchh baat ki tumne..??” Manjari ke man me laakhon sawal the..
“jaan kar anjaan ban gayi..hazaron message the mere paaas..dikhaye maine..kaise nahi pahchanati, lekin usane kya kaha janati ho ??---“aapko koi galatfahmi huyi hai..mai aapko nahi jaanti” Manu aise hansa jaise khud ka hi majak bana udaa raha ho !
“kya pata wo koi aur hi rahi ho..?” Manjari ne kaha , “tumne pata karane ki kosis nahi ki baad me ki wo ladaki kaun hai ?”
“pta kiya maine..pta chala dulhe ke kisi dost ki bahan hai..naam Shruti…mujhe usane Anjali bataya tha..” Manjari chup ho gayi .
“usane ek baar bhi meri taraf nahi dekha”
“ khud pe hansi aa rahi thi mujhe, shayad tumhe bhi aa rahi hogi…bina dekhe bina mile pyar kiya tha maine..majaak hai na” manu hans raha tha, khud ke dard pe shayad.
“wo ladaki koi aur bhi ho sakati hai na..aisa bhi to ho sakata hai..” Manjari ne kaha !
“tumhe kisi se muhabbat ho gayi agar kabhi na to dhadakn se pachan jaogi, shakl dekhane ki bhi jarurat nahi padegi..” Manu kisi aur hi duniya me tha aur manjari shabd viheen ho gayi !
“poonam se baat karake us ladaki ke bare me pta to lagaa sakte ho..?”
“ kis liye? Ab kis liye..? bas itni si baat ka dukh hai ki kaash wo kabhi milti hi nahi, ek bharam rah jata muhabbat ke hone ka..” Manu ne kaha !
Manjari usaki baat sunkar chup ho gayi thi, jo usake man me aa raha tha usame use aisi koi baat nahi lag rahi thi ki Manu itna dukhi ho , aajkal to shadi ke baad rishte nahi chalate ,real life me bhi aajkal hafte do hafte me lovers badal jaate hain , to aisi muhabbat ke toot jaane ka kaisa gham jo kabhi mili hi nahi . dusari taraf Manu bhi shayad samajh gaya tha ki Mnajri kya soch rahi hai .
“thanks, meri baat sun’ne ke liye..raat bahut ho gayi..so jaate hain..” Manu ne kaha
“hmm..” shayad Manjri ke muhabbat ka tilism bhi toot gaya tha..Manu use bahut mature, samajhdaar aur suljha hua lagta tha, lekin aaj jis tarah se usane us ladaki pe saara iljaam laga diya tha us se manjari kaafi soch me pad gayi thi !
“ Goodnight” Manu ne kaha
“agar kabhi wo ladaki mil jaaye fir se to..” Manjari ne puchha..
“to bas itna puchhunga, kabhi muhabbat huyi hai kya aapko ?”
Bada ajeeb sa jawab diya tha Manu ne…dono phone rakh chuke the..Manjari ki deewanagi jaati rahi, Manu to bada aam sa insaan nikalaa tha . Zindagi me aage badh jaane ka faislaa kar liya tha usane.
22 saal ho gaye the mujhe Manu se mile huye..aaj Poonam ke bêti ki shadi thi aur usane bahut jor diya tha ki mai aaun..flight ke teen ticket bhi bhej diye the..mere pati aur chhoti beti ke liye..jaisa ki aamtaur pe hota tha, mai akele hi jaa rahi thi. Poonam ab Delhi me hi rahati thi aur aaj shadi bhi whi ek hotel me ho rahi thi..airport pe gaadi lene aayi aur sham ke 4 baje mai poonam ke ghar ke liye rawana ho gayi…koi 45 minute ka safar tha aisa driver ne bataya.
Pichhle 20-22 saalon me Meri zindagi ki kahani kuchh jyada dilcasp nahi thi.. shadi meri zindagi ka sabse bura chapter tha, mere pati income tax officer the..office ke baad unaki saari dhauns mujhape nikalti thi..bachche bhi baap par hi gaye the..meri ahmiayt ghar ke kisi purane bartan ki tarah ho gayi thi..na mere rahane se kisi ko fark padana tha aur na hi naa rahne se..kahane ko Zindagi me sabkuchh mila tha , bas Muhabbat ke siwaay...Manu kabhi kabhi bahut yaad aate the lekin maine kabhi unake bare me jaan’ne ki kosis nahi ki. Aaj poonam se milane ki khushi tse jyada Manu ko dekhane ki chahat.
Poonam sachche purane dosto ki tarah mili thi..mujhe gale lagate lagate aankh bhar aayi usaki, mere andar shayad ye wale emotions bahut pahale hi dam tod chuke the..Poonam ki sirf ek beti thi ,khubsoorat jaheen, hansmukh .. usake pati bhi khushmizaj the….sab muhabbat se mile the mujhase…lekin mujhe ab tak wo nahi dikha tha jise dekhane ko dil taras raha tha !
Lagbhag 35-40 minute beet gaye to mane poonam se puchha.. “Manu nahi aaye hain kya…”
“ Aaya hai na..yahi honga kahi..wo dekh..udhar..” Poonam ne ek or ungali uthayi…
Maine us or dekha aur dekhati rahi..Manu kafi badal gaye the….maroon colour ka rajsthani kurta aur kaal pajama pahane , clean shave me wo pahal se bhi jyada smart lag rahe the..hotho pe halki si hansi aur aankho me duniya bhar ki sukoon, bagal me baithi aurat ki baat dhyan se sun rahe the.. mai pahchaan bhi na pati khud se dekhati to..shayad mai bhool gayi thi ki 22 saal bahut waqt hota hai..shayad isliye bhool gayi thi kyuki mera waqt thahar gaya tha, ek galat faisle ki vajah se.
“mai aati hun..” maine kaha aur us or badh gayi !
Kuchh door pe ruk gayi..Manu ne meri or dekha … “mai abhi aaya..excuse me please..” unhone kaha aur uth gaye.
“kaisi hain aap..”dono haath jodkar namaste karte huye kaha unhone..badi ajeeb si sharmindagi ho rahi thi mujhe..wo ek pal me pahchan gaye the mujhe.
“thik hun main aap kaise hain..” maine kaha
Wo mere family aur life ke bare me puchhane lage..aur mai kuchh chhupaati kuchh batati unake saath chalne lagi..hum saath chal rahe the aur walk karte karte hotel me bane fawware ke paas aa gaye jidhar kam log the..wahi fawware ke paas baith gaye..
“aap kuchh bataiye..kaisi chal rahi life..”
“bas dua hai aap logo ki, sab badhiya hai..” uanki aawaz me ek rawaani thi..aaj bhi , pahale se kahi jyada..
“kaha rahte hain aap..family kaha hai? ”
“Banglore me ek chhoti si software firm hai meri..wahi rahata hun..”
“bachche kitane hain..” maine puchha !
“ek beti hai..”
“aur madam kaha hain..aapki wife..” bada ajeeb laga tha ye puchhna..
Unhone ne dekha meri taraf….muskuraye aur fir use thare se andaz me bole.. “ek tarfaa muhabbat karane wale humsafar ki tamnna nahi karte”
“fir beti?”
“god liya hai maine.”
Mai unhe dekhati rahi..dekhati rahi..aur apani nazaro me girati rahi..22 saal pahale maine jis insaan ko judge kiya tha, jiska bharosa toda tha aaj wo mujhe khud se bahut unchaai pe nazar aa raha tha… “log kya sochenge mere bare me, hansenge,,is dar se kisi ko nahi batata” mujhe unaki us raat ki ye baat yaad aa rahi thi..22 saalo me ek bhi aisi raat nahi thi jab mujhe ye baat yaad na aayi ho..unhone mujhpae yakeen karake mujhe apana sach bataya tha , aur maine bhi wahi kiya..unpe hansi aur chali gayi-
“ek baat puchhun..?” maine kaha
“jee”
“kabhi mili fir wo ..”
“nahi”
“fir??”
“muhabbat to maine ki thi, ummeeden unse kyun..” wo muskurate huye bole !
“shikayat to hogi ?”
“thi, jab ye socha tha ki unhe bhi muhabbat hai..” Manu ne kaha
“ pata ha aapko, ek waqt ke baad ye dar jaata raha ki log kya sochenge, log hansenge..bas Muhabbat bachati hai..ummeed bhi nahi..sirf muhabbat..” Mujhe aaj fir Manu pagal lag rahe the
“itna aasan hai kya khud ko barbaad kar lena..?” mere muh se nikal gaya
“jee, bas muhabbat hona aasan nahi hota uske baad sabkuchh aasan hai..”
Wo muskura rahe the aur barso baad meri aankho me aansoo the..unhone jise chaha usake naam zindagi kar di aur maine jis se chaaha usake saath chaar kadam bhi nahi chal paayi...shayad isiliye mujhe muhabbat mili nahi ..mera dard pighal raha tha ….ek din main kisi ki muhabbat pe hansi thi, aur aaj meri muhabbat mujhpe hans rahi thi.
