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Update 3
Armaan and Neil returned to the room where Mithila was locked.
“You said something about Meera seeing me on the 4th of November last year at The Intercontinental,” Neil said, “How do you remember so precisely?”
“Because she came to me that night,” Mithila said, “After she followed you to your house, she found her way to her childhood house. There she found out about someone named Naina…” Mithila couldn’t hold eye contact with Neil as fear overwhelmed her as she mentioned Naina’s name in front of them. She remembered what they did to Meera after she confronted them about Naina.
“What does Meera know about Naina?” Armaan asked sharply.
“Everything I guess,” Mithila said, “She found Naina’s diary in that house, Naina had fondly mentioned Neil several times. Meera found her own childhood photographs and her birth certificate and that’s how she found out her real name. No one really lives in that house. People say it is haunted. Meera also claimed to have seen Naina’s ghost there…which I believed to be a hallucination coz the ghost didn’t tell her anything more than what she already knew.”
“Where is this house?” Armaan asked.
“I don’t know…” Mithila said tearfully.
“I know,” Neil spoke softly, “I know where this house is.”
Armaan then looked at Mithila and said, “Get back in the car.”
Armaan and Neil got into the car and drove off. Mithila quietly sobbed in the backseat. “I am sorry Armaan,” Mithila said, “I loved Meera, I took care of her…she was so wounded and broken when I found her, I just wanted to heal her…but I couldn’t save her. She was a good girl, but her wounds festered and corrupted her. I never realized when she became a monster…”
Armaan rolled his eyes as he looked at Mithila in the rear-view mirror. “I am not interested in your poetry, Mithila. I am holding up my end of the deal. I won’t hurt you or your family. And I expect your co-operation. And if I find out that you are in touch with Meera and you are not telling me or you had anything to do with Reyansh’s disappearance, the deal is off, get it?” he said.
Mithila just nodded as tears rolled down her cheeks.
Armaan dropped her back at her house. Mithila quietly got out of the car and walked towards her house.
“Tell me where Naina’s house is,” Armaan said to Neil.
“Why are we going there?” Neil asked.
“Understand this, Neil,” Armaan said, “Meera could do what she did because she knew everything about us and we knew nothing. I think it is high time we know her whole story. And I need her childhood photographs. I am going to find out what exactly happened after she was sent away. If Meera really has a child, the people who kept her as a slave would know about it.”
“Meera is already a week ahead of you,” Neil said.
“Yeah but I’m gonna close this gap pretty quickly,” Armaan said, “Did you hear the part in the tape about a lot of money in cash? If she is going to illegally enter a country with that much cash, she will most likely travel by sea, and I and going to book the next available flight.”
Neil guided Armaan to Naina’s house. Armaan parked his car in front of the deserted house. Neil felt a chill as he read the name “Patil Niwas”
Armaan broke open the padlock on the gate with a crowbar and pushed open the iron gate. Neil followed him with trembling steps. Armaan kicked open the door and entered the house. Neil felt a sudden chill as he stepped in the house, but Armaan proceeded with demonic speed.
Finally, they reached Naina’s room.
Armaan began to search the almirah and found Meera’s birth certificate and her childhood photos. His heart skipped a beat as he recognized Meera as a child and remembered the horrible thing he had done to her. He collected all of Meera’s childhood photos.
Neil found Naina’s diary on the table and began to read it. Tears continuously flowed from his eyes as he remembered how he cruelly manipulated and tortured a girl who loved him so much and was ready to take anything for his pleasure. When he looked up, his vision was blurry due to his tears. But he saw a figure. And the figure moved closer Neil could see Naina. She was wearing the same red dress she wore that night he had last seen her. He stood frozen as Naina smiled sweetly at him. There was still so much love in her eyes, Neil could feel his guilt strangulating him. He was barely able to breathe.
Armaan noticed that Neil was blankly staring at nothing.
“Neil,” Armaan said shaking him, “You OK?”
Neil didn’t respond, he just kept staring blankly.
“Neil,” Armaan said tapping his cheek, “Answer me, are you OK?”
“I see her,” Neil said as a tear rolled down his cheek. Armaan followed his gaze but couldn’t see anything.
“We need to get out of here,” Armaan said in an alarming tone, as he grabbed Neil’s arm and led him out of the house.
He made Neil get into the car and started driving. Neil didn’t speak a word. He just stared blankly straight ahead. Armaan was beginning to get worried about him. But Neil was very silent. All of Naina’s memories were flashing in front of his eyes. The memories of the last day of her life were haunting him now. And suddenly he saw her. She was standing on the road in front of them, in her red dress, bleeding and broken, just like Neil had left her. Neil panicked and grabbed the steering wheel and turned it sharply towards the left to avoid running over her. Armaan was suddenly taken aback and pressed down on the brakes. The wheels screeched to a stop but the car collided into a tree and the windshield shattered injuring both of them.
“WHAT THE HELL NEIL!” Armaan shouted.
“I am sorry…” Neil stuttered as he looked visibly shaken, “Naina was here…I saw her…I didn’t want us to run over her…”
Blood trickled down their bruised faces. Armaan was angry but Neil just looked broken.
“There was nobody Neil!” Armaan yelled, “You could have just killed both of us!”
“Perhaps that would have been for the best…” Neil said closing his eyes as tears streamed down his face.
“That is exactly what Meera wants,” Armaan said gritting his teeth, “She wants us to drown in self-loathing and kill ourselves! She already succeeded with Aarav, she couldn’t break Reyansh so she got him murdered, and now I am not going to lose you too! Enough is enough! I am not going to kill myself and neither am I going to let you!”
“I am sorry…” Neil said.
“Listen to me Neil,” Armaan said forcing Neil to look him in the eye, “You need to toughen up brother. You still have two daughters and they need you. They may have some misunderstandings about you right now, but eventually they will understand that you did what you did out of your love for them, and they are going to love you. And you need to be strong for them.”
“I am trying…” Neil said.
“Well, you just tried to kill both of us, so clearly you are not trying hard enough,” Armaan said sternly, “How do you think I feel when I look at Pankh? I feel like a goddamn loser who couldn’t protect my girl. There hasn’t been one night since I brought her home that she didn’t wake up screaming. She tries to hide her pain, she tries to smile at me, but I know how deeply wounded she is. And even though it would tear me apart, I am going to watch her rape videos over and over again, because I want to find each and every one of those bastards who hurt her. And I am going to find Meera. I am not going to let the people who did that to my Pankh just walk away! You get that Neil?”
Neil just looked away.
“Look Neil…” Armaan said with a softened expression, “All I’ve ever tried to do is protect the people I care about. I care about you Neil, you are my brother, and I’ll do everything I can to keep you out of jail. I am just trying to help you, but I really can’t help you if you won’t let me. Yeah, we did a horrible thing, but our families didn’t deserve to suffer for it, but they did anyway. And now they need us more than ever, and I am going to be there for Pankh and my child. You should think about your children too.”
Armaan dialed the emergency number and called for an ambulance. They were taken to a hospital and treated for their injuries.
“I need to speak to a psychiatrist urgently,” Armaan said to the treating doctor.
“What is this regarding?” the doctor asked.
“My friend,” Armaan said, “This accident…wasn’t really an accident. Neil is…he is depressed. He might try to hurt himself.”
The doctor understood the situation and arranged a psychiatrist.
“Neil is an imminent threat to himself,” Armaan said to the psychiatrist, “I request a psychiatric hospitalization for him. He needs to be watched 24/7. I am afraid, if left on his own, he will try to hurt himself.”
“Does he have any history of mental illnesses?” the doctor asked.
“No…but there’s significant trauma…” Armaan said with a sad expression, “And he is drowning…”
*******************************
Armaan drove back to his house. It was 1 am and Pankhudi lay awake in her bed waiting for her husband.
She heard the front gates open and ran towards the window. She saw Armaan’s car enter the gates. She was relieved to see him return. She had tried calling him a few times earlier but he hadn’t answered. He had just dropped a text that he’ll be home soon. She had been waiting for him since then.
But even after the while he didn’t come to the bedroom. Pankhudi went downstairs looking for him. She asked the servants and a maid told her that he was by the poolside and didn’t want to be disturbed.
Pankhudi walked up to the pool. Armaan was lying on one of the pool chairs. He had turned off all the surround lights. He lay alone in the dark gazing at the night sky.
Pankhudi walked towards him. He heard the sound of her anklets and turned his head towards her.
“You didn’t have to stay awake waiting for me Pankh,” he said with a weak smile.
“I couldn’t sleep,” she said “I was worried.”
She suddenly got anxious looking at the wounds on his face and body. “What happened Armaan?” she asked nervously cupping his face.
Armaan gently pulled her onto his lap and rested her head against his chest. He warmly held her in his embrace.
“Reyansh is missing,” Armaan said running his hands through her hair, “He went missing right after Meera ordered a hit on him. I don’t know if we will ever see him again. And me and Neil…we had an accident. Neil tried to…he is drowning Pankh, his gaze is so empty…like he doesn’t want to live anymore…”
Pankhudi was just listening nervously. She didn’t know what to say.
“So many lives ruined because one man couldn’t take no for an answer…” Armaan said taking a deep breath, holding Pankhudi tighter.
“Are you hurt, my love?” Pankhudi asked lovingly touching his face.
“I am…” Armaan said, “I’m just trying to calm the storm in my heart…Pankh, you remember that night…when we were lost in the woods, we were hurt, and hungry…”
“You were hungry…” Pankhudi said touching his lips, “But you made sure I had enough to eat…”
Armaan smiled and kissed her. Then he continued as he ran his fingers though her silken hair, “We lit a fire and you snuggled close, you were trying to talk to me but I didn’t respond, so you just curled up next to me and you sang a sweet song looking at the stars…
“It was a song by Enya that I heard several years ago…It’s called “Fallen Embers” I loved it’s soft tune…” Pankhudi said with a smile.
“Could you sing that song again for me?” he implored hugging her tightly.
Pankhudi snuggled deeper into his arms and started singing,
“Once, as my heart remembers
All the stars were fallen embers
Once, when night seemed forever
I was with you
Once, in the care of morning
In the air was all belonging
Once, when that day was dawning
I was with you
How far we are from morning?
How far we are?
And the stars shining through the darkness
Falling in the air
Once, as the night was leaving
Into us, our dreams were weaving
Once, all dreams were worth keeping
I was with you
Once, when our hearts were singing
I was with you”
Pankhudi noticed that Armaan was in tears as she finished her song.
“Hey sweetheart,” she said putting her arms around his neck.
“I am sorry Pankh,” he said in a breaking voice, “All I could ever give you was pain and suffering…”
“No one can love me as deeply as you do Armaan,” Pankhudi said showering him with kisses, “The truest love stories are filled with the deepest sufferings. We have our scars and we won’t be the same again, but our love is now so much stronger and deeper. You know I’d do anything for you, and I know you’d do the same.”
Armaan hugged her tightly and let tears escape from his eyes.
“And you have given me this beautiful child,” Pankhudi said fondly touching her belly, “Little one kept me alive though it all, didn’t let me break, and kept my heart beating because I had a part of you inside me, nothing could separate me from you. I knew you could come for me and you did.”
“It tears me apart Pankh,” Armaan said, “To think of the woman I love, suffering like that at such a delicate moment…and it devastates me to think that I brought this upon you…”
“Your love is all I need to heal,” Pankhudi said with a sweet smile, looking into his tearful eyes.
“She was only a child when I sent her away,” Armaan said, “I was trying to protect Neil…and I did a horrible thing. Meera is a monster I created with my own hands.”
“She was blind with anger and pain,” Pankhudi said, “Lost with no direction…”
“I begged her,” Armaan said tearfully, “I begged her over and over again to let you go…and hurt me instead…I would have let her do anything to me…she could have tortured me to her heart’s content and I wouldn’t have put up the slightest resistance…I just wanted her to stop hurting you, but she didn’t listen! She didn’t listen!”
Armaan’s expression now darkened as he spoke vengefully, “I won’t let her get away with this, I won’t! I want to after her Pankh, to the Arab Countries, I just found out that she has a daughter and she’s looking for her. I wanna find her and make her fucking pay!”
Pankhudi kissed his cheek and gently ran her hand on his chest to calm him down.
“But then…” he continued, “I don’t want to leave you alone at this moment when you need me the most…”
“I’ll be fine…” Pankhudi said, “If you want to go after her, I’ll let you go. I want to be your strength Armaan, not your weakness who holds you back every time. Do what you need to do sweetheart. Do what it takes to calm the storm in your heart.”
Armaan kissed her forehead and held her close. He closed his eyes and felt the warm breeze caress him.
Armaan and Neil returned to the room where Mithila was locked.
“You said something about Meera seeing me on the 4th of November last year at The Intercontinental,” Neil said, “How do you remember so precisely?”
“Because she came to me that night,” Mithila said, “After she followed you to your house, she found her way to her childhood house. There she found out about someone named Naina…” Mithila couldn’t hold eye contact with Neil as fear overwhelmed her as she mentioned Naina’s name in front of them. She remembered what they did to Meera after she confronted them about Naina.
“What does Meera know about Naina?” Armaan asked sharply.
“Everything I guess,” Mithila said, “She found Naina’s diary in that house, Naina had fondly mentioned Neil several times. Meera found her own childhood photographs and her birth certificate and that’s how she found out her real name. No one really lives in that house. People say it is haunted. Meera also claimed to have seen Naina’s ghost there…which I believed to be a hallucination coz the ghost didn’t tell her anything more than what she already knew.”
“Where is this house?” Armaan asked.
“I don’t know…” Mithila said tearfully.
“I know,” Neil spoke softly, “I know where this house is.”
Armaan then looked at Mithila and said, “Get back in the car.”
Armaan and Neil got into the car and drove off. Mithila quietly sobbed in the backseat. “I am sorry Armaan,” Mithila said, “I loved Meera, I took care of her…she was so wounded and broken when I found her, I just wanted to heal her…but I couldn’t save her. She was a good girl, but her wounds festered and corrupted her. I never realized when she became a monster…”
Armaan rolled his eyes as he looked at Mithila in the rear-view mirror. “I am not interested in your poetry, Mithila. I am holding up my end of the deal. I won’t hurt you or your family. And I expect your co-operation. And if I find out that you are in touch with Meera and you are not telling me or you had anything to do with Reyansh’s disappearance, the deal is off, get it?” he said.
Mithila just nodded as tears rolled down her cheeks.
Armaan dropped her back at her house. Mithila quietly got out of the car and walked towards her house.
“Tell me where Naina’s house is,” Armaan said to Neil.
“Why are we going there?” Neil asked.
“Understand this, Neil,” Armaan said, “Meera could do what she did because she knew everything about us and we knew nothing. I think it is high time we know her whole story. And I need her childhood photographs. I am going to find out what exactly happened after she was sent away. If Meera really has a child, the people who kept her as a slave would know about it.”
“Meera is already a week ahead of you,” Neil said.
“Yeah but I’m gonna close this gap pretty quickly,” Armaan said, “Did you hear the part in the tape about a lot of money in cash? If she is going to illegally enter a country with that much cash, she will most likely travel by sea, and I and going to book the next available flight.”
Neil guided Armaan to Naina’s house. Armaan parked his car in front of the deserted house. Neil felt a chill as he read the name “Patil Niwas”
Armaan broke open the padlock on the gate with a crowbar and pushed open the iron gate. Neil followed him with trembling steps. Armaan kicked open the door and entered the house. Neil felt a sudden chill as he stepped in the house, but Armaan proceeded with demonic speed.
Finally, they reached Naina’s room.
Armaan began to search the almirah and found Meera’s birth certificate and her childhood photos. His heart skipped a beat as he recognized Meera as a child and remembered the horrible thing he had done to her. He collected all of Meera’s childhood photos.
Neil found Naina’s diary on the table and began to read it. Tears continuously flowed from his eyes as he remembered how he cruelly manipulated and tortured a girl who loved him so much and was ready to take anything for his pleasure. When he looked up, his vision was blurry due to his tears. But he saw a figure. And the figure moved closer Neil could see Naina. She was wearing the same red dress she wore that night he had last seen her. He stood frozen as Naina smiled sweetly at him. There was still so much love in her eyes, Neil could feel his guilt strangulating him. He was barely able to breathe.
Armaan noticed that Neil was blankly staring at nothing.
“Neil,” Armaan said shaking him, “You OK?”
Neil didn’t respond, he just kept staring blankly.
“Neil,” Armaan said tapping his cheek, “Answer me, are you OK?”
“I see her,” Neil said as a tear rolled down his cheek. Armaan followed his gaze but couldn’t see anything.
“We need to get out of here,” Armaan said in an alarming tone, as he grabbed Neil’s arm and led him out of the house.
He made Neil get into the car and started driving. Neil didn’t speak a word. He just stared blankly straight ahead. Armaan was beginning to get worried about him. But Neil was very silent. All of Naina’s memories were flashing in front of his eyes. The memories of the last day of her life were haunting him now. And suddenly he saw her. She was standing on the road in front of them, in her red dress, bleeding and broken, just like Neil had left her. Neil panicked and grabbed the steering wheel and turned it sharply towards the left to avoid running over her. Armaan was suddenly taken aback and pressed down on the brakes. The wheels screeched to a stop but the car collided into a tree and the windshield shattered injuring both of them.
“WHAT THE HELL NEIL!” Armaan shouted.
“I am sorry…” Neil stuttered as he looked visibly shaken, “Naina was here…I saw her…I didn’t want us to run over her…”
Blood trickled down their bruised faces. Armaan was angry but Neil just looked broken.
“There was nobody Neil!” Armaan yelled, “You could have just killed both of us!”
“Perhaps that would have been for the best…” Neil said closing his eyes as tears streamed down his face.
“That is exactly what Meera wants,” Armaan said gritting his teeth, “She wants us to drown in self-loathing and kill ourselves! She already succeeded with Aarav, she couldn’t break Reyansh so she got him murdered, and now I am not going to lose you too! Enough is enough! I am not going to kill myself and neither am I going to let you!”
“I am sorry…” Neil said.
“Listen to me Neil,” Armaan said forcing Neil to look him in the eye, “You need to toughen up brother. You still have two daughters and they need you. They may have some misunderstandings about you right now, but eventually they will understand that you did what you did out of your love for them, and they are going to love you. And you need to be strong for them.”
“I am trying…” Neil said.
“Well, you just tried to kill both of us, so clearly you are not trying hard enough,” Armaan said sternly, “How do you think I feel when I look at Pankh? I feel like a goddamn loser who couldn’t protect my girl. There hasn’t been one night since I brought her home that she didn’t wake up screaming. She tries to hide her pain, she tries to smile at me, but I know how deeply wounded she is. And even though it would tear me apart, I am going to watch her rape videos over and over again, because I want to find each and every one of those bastards who hurt her. And I am going to find Meera. I am not going to let the people who did that to my Pankh just walk away! You get that Neil?”
Neil just looked away.
“Look Neil…” Armaan said with a softened expression, “All I’ve ever tried to do is protect the people I care about. I care about you Neil, you are my brother, and I’ll do everything I can to keep you out of jail. I am just trying to help you, but I really can’t help you if you won’t let me. Yeah, we did a horrible thing, but our families didn’t deserve to suffer for it, but they did anyway. And now they need us more than ever, and I am going to be there for Pankh and my child. You should think about your children too.”
Armaan dialed the emergency number and called for an ambulance. They were taken to a hospital and treated for their injuries.
“I need to speak to a psychiatrist urgently,” Armaan said to the treating doctor.
“What is this regarding?” the doctor asked.
“My friend,” Armaan said, “This accident…wasn’t really an accident. Neil is…he is depressed. He might try to hurt himself.”
The doctor understood the situation and arranged a psychiatrist.
“Neil is an imminent threat to himself,” Armaan said to the psychiatrist, “I request a psychiatric hospitalization for him. He needs to be watched 24/7. I am afraid, if left on his own, he will try to hurt himself.”
“Does he have any history of mental illnesses?” the doctor asked.
“No…but there’s significant trauma…” Armaan said with a sad expression, “And he is drowning…”
*******************************
Armaan drove back to his house. It was 1 am and Pankhudi lay awake in her bed waiting for her husband.
She heard the front gates open and ran towards the window. She saw Armaan’s car enter the gates. She was relieved to see him return. She had tried calling him a few times earlier but he hadn’t answered. He had just dropped a text that he’ll be home soon. She had been waiting for him since then.
But even after the while he didn’t come to the bedroom. Pankhudi went downstairs looking for him. She asked the servants and a maid told her that he was by the poolside and didn’t want to be disturbed.
Pankhudi walked up to the pool. Armaan was lying on one of the pool chairs. He had turned off all the surround lights. He lay alone in the dark gazing at the night sky.
Pankhudi walked towards him. He heard the sound of her anklets and turned his head towards her.
“You didn’t have to stay awake waiting for me Pankh,” he said with a weak smile.
“I couldn’t sleep,” she said “I was worried.”
She suddenly got anxious looking at the wounds on his face and body. “What happened Armaan?” she asked nervously cupping his face.
Armaan gently pulled her onto his lap and rested her head against his chest. He warmly held her in his embrace.
“Reyansh is missing,” Armaan said running his hands through her hair, “He went missing right after Meera ordered a hit on him. I don’t know if we will ever see him again. And me and Neil…we had an accident. Neil tried to…he is drowning Pankh, his gaze is so empty…like he doesn’t want to live anymore…”
Pankhudi was just listening nervously. She didn’t know what to say.
“So many lives ruined because one man couldn’t take no for an answer…” Armaan said taking a deep breath, holding Pankhudi tighter.
“Are you hurt, my love?” Pankhudi asked lovingly touching his face.
“I am…” Armaan said, “I’m just trying to calm the storm in my heart…Pankh, you remember that night…when we were lost in the woods, we were hurt, and hungry…”
“You were hungry…” Pankhudi said touching his lips, “But you made sure I had enough to eat…”
Armaan smiled and kissed her. Then he continued as he ran his fingers though her silken hair, “We lit a fire and you snuggled close, you were trying to talk to me but I didn’t respond, so you just curled up next to me and you sang a sweet song looking at the stars…
“It was a song by Enya that I heard several years ago…It’s called “Fallen Embers” I loved it’s soft tune…” Pankhudi said with a smile.
“Could you sing that song again for me?” he implored hugging her tightly.
Pankhudi snuggled deeper into his arms and started singing,
“Once, as my heart remembers
All the stars were fallen embers
Once, when night seemed forever
I was with you
Once, in the care of morning
In the air was all belonging
Once, when that day was dawning
I was with you
How far we are from morning?
How far we are?
And the stars shining through the darkness
Falling in the air
Once, as the night was leaving
Into us, our dreams were weaving
Once, all dreams were worth keeping
I was with you
Once, when our hearts were singing
I was with you”
Pankhudi noticed that Armaan was in tears as she finished her song.
“Hey sweetheart,” she said putting her arms around his neck.
“I am sorry Pankh,” he said in a breaking voice, “All I could ever give you was pain and suffering…”
“No one can love me as deeply as you do Armaan,” Pankhudi said showering him with kisses, “The truest love stories are filled with the deepest sufferings. We have our scars and we won’t be the same again, but our love is now so much stronger and deeper. You know I’d do anything for you, and I know you’d do the same.”
Armaan hugged her tightly and let tears escape from his eyes.
“And you have given me this beautiful child,” Pankhudi said fondly touching her belly, “Little one kept me alive though it all, didn’t let me break, and kept my heart beating because I had a part of you inside me, nothing could separate me from you. I knew you could come for me and you did.”
“It tears me apart Pankh,” Armaan said, “To think of the woman I love, suffering like that at such a delicate moment…and it devastates me to think that I brought this upon you…”
“Your love is all I need to heal,” Pankhudi said with a sweet smile, looking into his tearful eyes.
“She was only a child when I sent her away,” Armaan said, “I was trying to protect Neil…and I did a horrible thing. Meera is a monster I created with my own hands.”
“She was blind with anger and pain,” Pankhudi said, “Lost with no direction…”
“I begged her,” Armaan said tearfully, “I begged her over and over again to let you go…and hurt me instead…I would have let her do anything to me…she could have tortured me to her heart’s content and I wouldn’t have put up the slightest resistance…I just wanted her to stop hurting you, but she didn’t listen! She didn’t listen!”
Armaan’s expression now darkened as he spoke vengefully, “I won’t let her get away with this, I won’t! I want to after her Pankh, to the Arab Countries, I just found out that she has a daughter and she’s looking for her. I wanna find her and make her fucking pay!”
Pankhudi kissed his cheek and gently ran her hand on his chest to calm him down.
“But then…” he continued, “I don’t want to leave you alone at this moment when you need me the most…”
“I’ll be fine…” Pankhudi said, “If you want to go after her, I’ll let you go. I want to be your strength Armaan, not your weakness who holds you back every time. Do what you need to do sweetheart. Do what it takes to calm the storm in your heart.”
Armaan kissed her forehead and held her close. He closed his eyes and felt the warm breeze caress him.
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