Update-122(Some Weird Shit)
Uske baad humlog so gaye bc thakk gaye they ...or kaafi raat bhi hogayi thi..or Kal fir Ek or game bajaana tha...
Subah early morning mujhe kissi ne jagayaa.. Toh as expected Saamne Anjali khaddi thi..
Main-What the fuck... 6 baje hain yaar... Koi tapak gaya kya...??
Anjali-Nahi re police waale aaein hain...
Main - kyun..?
Anjali-Kal jo hua uski Report toh banaani padegi naa unko...
Main-Toh main kya karunga usme banwaado tumlog...
Anjali-Actually SP aaya hai area kaa woh puri report banwaana caahta hai matlab Tumhaara naam add karna caahta hai because Rakesh ko tumne maara or Brijesh ko bhi tumne he maara lagaalo...
Main-Oh fuck no.. Mera Naam kissi report mein nahi hona caahiye kitani baar bola hai maine.. Mujhe koi credit nahi caahiye dono kaa incounter apne naam karwaalo...
Anjali-Maine bola unko lekin usko tumse baat karni hai aise report mein gadbbadi nahi kartey wagairaah wagairaah.. Imaandaar aadmi hai.. Or mera senior bhi..
Main-Ye bhenchod saare Imaandaar humein he kyun miltey hain... Subah subah ye dimag khaaega....chalo aata hun...
Anjali niche chali gayi main fresh hoke niche aaya toh niche SP k sath kuch or Officers bhi they.. SP thakur k sath baitha tha.. Or jiss hissab se thakur se baat Kar raha tha woh matlab iss area mein respect thi uski...
SP-Hello Mr.AP...
Main-Hello SP sahaab... Suna milna caahtey ho aap mujhse...
SP-Ji woh darashal pehle toh Dhanywaad Jo Brijesh jaise gandey kiddey ko iss samaaj se nikaal diya aapne... bahot bahot badhaaiyaan....
Main - Thank you thank-you...
SP-So aapko toh maalum he hai police kaa kaam kaisa hota hai sab kaagaj par maangtey hain uppar waale.. Baaki Sab toh Anjali ji ne complete karwaa diya bus Brijesh or Rakesh kaa aap bataadijiye jarra...
Main-No idea... I guess Anjali ne maara tha dono ko..
SP-lekin wahaan rehney waale logon ne toh aapko dekha tha goli chalaatey hue rakesh par..
Main-Naa galat dekha main toh gaadi mein se he naa Uttara...
SP-hehehe..aap toh aise chuppa rahein hain maano arrest karlunga main aapko.. Bhai aap bhi police waale main bhi police waala aapne apna kaam kiya main apna karr raha hun toh issme chupane waala kya hai.. Brijesh Or rakesh ko toh waise bhi Jaana he tha...
Main - Exactly... Agar Jaana he tha toh kissne maara kaise maara doesn't matter kissi k naam bhi likhdo.. Mera kyun...?
SP-Kyunki Dekhne waalon ne aapka he naam liya hai..
Main - Raat k andhere mein unhe main dikh gaya or pehchaana kaise mujhe...? Mereko jaantey thodi hain wohlog...
SP-Ji unhone hulliyaa bataaya aapka...
Main-Raat ko unhe hulliyaa dikh gaya mera...?
SP-Street light bhi toh thi naa AP sahaab...
Main-Street lights itani bhi High quality nahi hain jo durr se kissi kaa pura ka pura hulliyaa he yaad rehjaae...India mein ho aap USA naa pohanchey abhi...
Abeer-Kya SP sahaab kyun befaltu lamba khinch rahe ho mere naam likhdo.. Usme kya itani panchaayaat hai.
SP-kaanoon aise kaam nahi karta naa Abeer sahaab... Jabtak AP sahaab kabool nahi karlenge or main ye apni report puri nahi karlunga main yahaan se nahi Jaane waala..
Main-dekho first thing first... I respect ki tum Immandar officer ho.. I respect that.. But the thing is main yahaan khadda hoke tabtak tumhaare sath behans kar shakta hun jabtak tumhaara sans naa fool jaae.. Or tum ghanta ye prove nahi kar paaoge ki woh main tha.... Ye dekho inmein se 10 log abhi gawaahi dedenge ki main pure time gaadi mein he tha to topic yahin khatam hojaaega or tum apni kaagaji kaarwaahi mein lage rehna... Isliye main nahi caahta hum dono kaa time kharaab ho isliye jiska naam likhna hai likhiye or file bandh kijiye..
SP-Wahi toh agar kissi kaa naam likhna hai toh aapka he likhdeta hun. Beshak prove nahi kar paaun but sach toh ye hai..
Main - Bhai kyun irritate kar rahe ho subah subah kahaan se padhke SP bane tum.. "Beshak Prove naa karr paaun lekin sach toh yahi hai" isme kya logic hua... Jo prove he naa hua woh sach kaise maanlega koi.. Dekho simple si baat bataata hun yahaan sabko malum hai maine maara dono ko but mujhe mera Naam kissi report mein nahi caahiye bus that's it...
SP-Aap ek kaam kijiye kissi Senior officer se baat karwaa dijiye meri... Fir jo woh bolenge woh kardunga main...
Ye sunke mujhe hansi aagayi... Matlab befaltu waali hansi nahi real waali hansi.. I really liked how innocent he was.. I mean aajkal itani high rank par itana immandar officer milna bahot mushkil hai.... Uss bandey ne meri frustration durr kardi...
Main-ok officer... You know what I really like you... Inlog k alaawa bahot Kam Police waale hain jinko ye baat boli hai maine..
SP-Thank you...
Main-So baat rahi senior officer ki toh abhi karwaa deta hun baat.. Dont worry a bit..
Maine phone nikaala or Yogesh uncle ko call kiya Yogesh uncle bole toh Jo SP they last part mein abhi DIG of Police haryana hain.. Thode time pehle aaye they jab red John par charcha horahi thi...
Main-Namaste uncle..
Yoge-Namastey-2 mere sher... Yamunanagar mein kya kand kar rahe ho tumlog...
Main-Kal he kiya raatko..
Yoge-Haan Haan Anjali ne bataaya mujhe aaj thoda bahot.. Bhai bahot he badhiya kaam kiya..
Mai-Haan.. Actually mereko thoda kaam Tha..
Yoge-ji boliye sir. ...
Main-Ye SP sahaab khaddey hain mere saamne Ritesh Garg...
Yoge-Hmmm... Haan Jaan gaya... Kaafi achaa officer hai.. Last month he medal Milla tha usse Governor se....
Main-So Ye kuch file Banaa rahe hain jisme mujhe mera Naam nahi caahiye inhone kahaa senior officer se baat karwaado toh woh uss hissab se karlenge... toh uska karo kuch..
Yoge-Kissi or kaa karwaado naam.. Kya badi baat hai illegal thodi naa Kiya hai kuch...
Main - Bus wahi karwaado.
Yoge-Hojaaega... Hogaya samjho...
Main-Beautiful.. Baat karlo...
Maine usko phone diya toh woh phone leke ek side ko chala gaya baat karne ko...
Abeer-Itana kya hans raha hai..
Main - Actually soch agar ye kahin highly corrupt jone kaa SP hota toh kya hota iss bechare kaa...?
Abeer-Lol... True..
Main-Nice dude nice.. We need few more officers like him...
Mangal -Agreed...
Meera-You look cute laughing..
Main-what the fuck line maar rahi hai kya...?
Meera-shut up..
Woh SP baat karke waapis aaya...
SP-thank you sir.. Baat hogayi..
Main-No problem dude.. No problem...
SP-OK main chalta hun ab...
Main-Sure sure... Bye... See you around...
Woh apne sathi officers ko leke chala gaya... Main waapis room mein aaya or fir nahaa dhoke kapdey wagairaah change karke niche aaya... Naasta ready hogaya tha.. Sabne nasta kiya... Uske baad Hum sab hall mein he baith gaye... Kyunki Thakur and family bahaar chale gaye humaare kuch bandey unke sath gaye.. Ab keval Gunjan humaare sath thi..
Main-By the way Sunny kaa kya karna hai fir...?
Abeer-Karna ye...
Main - ek second...
Abeer-AP..?
Main-Ek second... What the fuck is this...?
Abeer-kya..?
Main-Ye smell nahi aarahi halki halki tumlog ko...?
Abeer-Nahi..
Meera-Kaisi smell..
Main-Abeer... .
Abeer-I am here... Kya hua be...?
Anjali-AP...???
Main-holy fucking shit...
Ye bolke main bahaar ki taraf bhaaga..actually mujhe kuch feel horaha tha jisse main discribe nahi kar paraha tha... Kuch ajeeb saa like koi gas jaisa kuch... Lekin halka halka itana halka ki naak ko mehsush bhi naa hua lekin mera dimag rukk gaya usase ek second k liye...rebooting mode mein chala gaya bc main...
Main bahaar seedha lawn mein aake rukka jahaan jaake mujhe sans aaya.. What in the fucking world was that.. Aisa kuch pehle nahi dikha yaa sungha maine.. Bhenchod sasta chloroform toh nahi le aaya koi... Lekin bc chloroform toh mehnga waala he assar nahi karta mere uppar... Ye smell thodi bahot jaani pehchaani thi lekin sath sath mujhe ye lag raha tha first time hai mera...
Mere piche piche sablog bahaar aaye.
Abeer-Abe hua kya..?
Main-Bhai that shit was fucking insane... Almost behonsh hogaya tha main... Tumlog theek ho...?
Abeer-abe humein toh kuch mehsush bhi naa hua... Tujhe hua kya..?
Main-What the fuck.. Kissi ko bhi kuch nahi hua..
Ajay-Nope...
Deepak - Nhi toh...
Main-what the fuck just happened then.. Abe ek chakkar lagaake aao toh sab.. Dekho koi hai toh nahi aas pass kuch dhuaa wagairaah yaa koi banda..? Kuch bhi suspected saa...
Turant sablog bikhar gaye main ek bench par baitha mere sath Abeer Ami Meera and Anjali he they...
Abeer-Abe hua kya ye toh bata...?
Main-Some weird shit.. Mujhe kuch smell si aai jo kaafi halki thi or bahot jyaada ajeeb... 3 seconds mein toh mere andar ghuss gayi sab blank hogaya tha aankhein takk blank hogayi thi almost issi liye bhaagta hua yahaan aaya main... Yahaan aake vision clear hua...
Abeer-Kamaal hai humein kuch nahi hua...
Ami-Exactly... Tune naastey mein kya khaaya...
Main-Paraanthey.. Chutiya samjha hai kya.. Itana slow bhi naa hua dimag.. Yaad hai mujhe...
Ami-Just checking..
Main-fishy....lekin wahin dusri taraf ye mere mind ki koi new bakchodi ho shakti hai..
Abeer- I think so.. Kyunki tera dimag time time par aisi he weird harkatein karta hai...
Main-yep... Dekhtey hain agar search party ko agal bagal kuch nahi Milla toh fir Dimag ka he koi naya kand hai...
And as expected kissi ko kuch nahi Milla aaju baaju uppar niche.. . Bhen k lawde dimag gand fod deni hai maine teri.. aise chutiyaape akele mein kiya kar bhenchod sabke saamne beijjati karwaadi...gandu....ye experiment time or jagah dekh k kiya kar..
Ab Mujhe salaah di sabne ki Ruhi se mill lo... Jisko maine 3 seconds mein reject kardiya.. Mission k bich mein kuch bhi nahi..
Continued...
