Update-61(New Bakchodi)
Humlog haweli pohanchey Gaadi se uttarke andar aae bhenchod time k sath sath Dard increase horaha tha pair mein ab langdaake chal raha tha main humlog andar aae toh hall Mein Woh budhau Rakesh Babhi Bhai Ami or Meenu baithtey they..
Rakesh-Abeer or Mangal ko akele nahi Jaana tha Dubai waale kya pata kab kya kardein..
Main-Dubai waale ab kabhi kuch nahi karenge..
Ye sun sabne Humein dekha..
Main-So bhai Dubai is over..
Babhi-Really??
Rakesh-Kya?? Aise kaise??
Main-Aise he kartey hain hum toh.. 5 jail gaye Baaki Uppar.. All done and dusted.. Ab cacha Shri jaldi se apna samaan pack kijiye or lunch se Pehle gayab holena..
Deva-Hua kya woh toh bata??
Maine unhe puri Kahaani sunaai..
Deva - Well this is amazing great job yet again guys..
Babhi ne Humein Galle lagaya..
Babhi-Shabbas.. Firse prove kardiya tumlog ne ki together we are strong.. Good job guys..
Main-Guys nahi Ye Ravi ko side nikaalo Iss chu.... Iss paglait ne meri or Anjali ki taang tod di almost..
Ravi-Toh be unko thodi kuchal deta ab..
Main-Kyun be woh Konsa case kardetey tere Uppar ye dekho ghutna mera babhi..
Ye bolke maine apni pant Uppar khinchi toh bhenchod maine bhi abhi dekha ghutna mera toh kaafi chott lagi thi, and ghutne par se pant puri khoon se bharri thi..
Main-What the fuck ye toh kaafi lagi haibe..
Ravi-Yep.. Sorry again mujhe laga thodi bahot lagi hogi..
Babhi-Thodi??? Ye thodi hai.. Oh god baith tu khadda kya hai..
Main--Cacha chalo samaan pack karlo Ravi drop kar aaega jaldi karo... Utho utho..
Ravi-Aao chicha Gaadi nikaal raha hun main tabtak..
Sam-Aao aao samaan pack karne mein madad karunga main.. Lets go..
Sam usko uthaake leke gaya or main baitha wahaan sofa k Uppar Babhi First aid kit leke aai..
Main-Ami ko do ye kardegi part time doctor hai ye..
Babhi-Oh Haan yele Ami..
Ami ne Pehle cotton se blood saaf kiya then side Mein dawaai se maalish ki and then wound k Uppar dawaai lagaake patti ki then Uppar se garam patti ki kyunki chott 2 type ki thi ek toh wound tha blood kaa then Uppar se gumm chott lagi thi jo subah bhayaanak Dard karne waali thi..
Kaafi derr takk main wahin tha bhai Abeer and Mangal ko details deraha tha ki kaise hua kissne help ki kaise ki and ab aage kaa kya plan hai karke.. Then sabne lunch kiya or lunch k baad woh cacha gaya wahaan se bhenchod jaate jaate bada saa check legaya lekin gaya woh ye badi Baat thi.. Thank god.. Ravi or Rohit usse drop karne gaye they city Mein Jahaan uska ghar hai lekin Yahaan rehta nahi hai woh wahaan se Gaadi leke nikal jaaega Jahaan bhi rehta hai woh.. Abeer or Mangal bhi chale gaye waapis office ab wahaan main babhi Bhai Meenu or Ami he they.. Ki mere pass aaya Rohit kaa call..
Main-Haan..
Rohit-Abe panga hogaya lotus cinema k Saamne Ravi ne Gaadi thokdi or kuch londey hain Maan naa rahe local hain desi log .. Or Ulta Ravi bhi naa Maan raha..
Main-Bc kuch bhi karna Maar Pitt nahi karna ab or kissi bakwas baaji Mein time waste nahi karna hai sorry worry bolo main bhej raha hun Yahaan se tabtak.. 5 minute..
Rohit-Ok.. Jaldi lawde..
Call disconnected..
Main-(Chilaake) Oye Sam.. Sam.. Bahaar aabe jaldi..
Deva-Kya hua..? Kaisi Maar Pitt..
Main-Ye Ravi kaa maalum he hai aapko koi chota Mota accident hogaya hoga wahaan Ladd raha hai ab..
Babhi-Bada issue toh naa haina koi??
Sam-Kya haibe sone dey naa..
Main-Ravi kaa lafda ho gya Lotus cinema k saamne Ami tu sath Jaa or bahaar se Vinny ko lejaa turant nikal or Dhyaan rahe Maar Pitt nahi karni sorry bol paise dey kuch bhi kar Jaake..
Sam-Nice dude.. Ami Aa toh..
Ami-Hell yeah lets go..
Main-A hell yeah no fighting remember no fighting..
Ami-Sure..
Sam or Ami nikale turant.. Ye bhenchod Ravi ki khopdi firr gayi toh ek or kand karwaadega ye fir media ki bakchodi, police case yaa court case yaa fir Saamne waale koi local gundey he nikal aae toh bhenchod unse nipatney Mein he time ki gand Marr jaaegi..
Babhi-Bol naa issue bada toh nahi haina??
Main-Nahi bada hota toh Rohit seedha bulaa he leta wahaan..
Babhi-Ek teri garam khopdi then ek Ravi ki garam khopdi tumlog shant rehna kab seekhoge pata nahi..
Main-Main toh shant he hun yaar maine khud shant rehney k liye bola abhi unko..
Babhi-Nahi waise toh tu shant he rehta hai jab tu shant rehta hai toh terese shant koi nahi or jab gussa hota hai toh tere jaisa koi nahi tu unique he hai..
Main-Aaila aisa kya??
Deva-Khuss kya horaha hai Alien bol rahi hai tujhe..
Main-Dafukk
Meenu-Lol..
Ab aaya Sam ka call..
Main-Haan hua kuch??
Sam-Ho toh gaye shant Saamne waale bhenchod desi they pure add gaye they Ravi ki gand todne par woh toh bheed jyaada thi toh bich bachaav hogaya warna gand tutt jaati Ravi or Rohit ki.. Saamne waale yahin ghum rahe hain main leke aata hun inhe ab..
Main - Ravi kidhar hai??
Sam-Laal horaha hai idhar bolraha hai gand tode bina na jaunga..
Main-Usko bol babhi aarahi hai..
Sam-Ok leke aata hun main don't worry..
Call disconnected..
Main-Chalo sab theek hai.. But Ravi laal hai toh main Jaata hun room Mein usko bolna ye Shant karne waala idea babhi kaa tha mera Naam nahi lena..
Babhi-OK tu ja main dekhlungi..
Main uthke chala toh seedhiyo par gand fatt gayi bc lekin jaise taise langdaatey hue seedhiyon se room Mein aaya main or Jo painkillers they mere pass woh leke so gaya bc seedha dinner k time he utha.. Toh bhenchod Dard or badh gaya tha.. Hath munh dhoye or dinner bhi Uppar he mangwaaliya maine kyunki abhi Ravi gusse Mein he rahega woh chappar-2 karega isase acha yahin khaa lun.. Dinner k Baad maine Chang ko updates di usse scene samjhaaya.. Then maine dekhi movies abhi utha tha toh late takk soya bc Or Subah utha college k time aaj college jaane kaa mood nahi tha but socha chal padtey hain kyunki abhi kuch karne ko hai nahi atleast college Jaake Woh uday ki girlfriend k liye koi plan he karlenge.. Isliye main ready hua and again niche uttara toh bc gand fatt gayi Dard tha kaafi abhi bhi.. Sam or Ravi breakfast kar rahe they wohlog ready they main bhi aaya wahaan Meenu ne naasta serve kiya Ravi ka munh abhi bhi sadela tha.. Meenu waapis kitchen Mein gayi..
Main-Kya hua be??
Sam-Wahi same topic..
Main-Chutiya logon par itana Dhyaan nahi dene kaa be gandu..
Ravi-Ye shanti waala idea tera tha naa?? Mujhe pata hai tera tha juth naa bolna kyunki kal se chupp raha hai tu mujhse iska matlab idea tera tha..
Main-Dekh be abhi aise gandu logon k liye time nahi hai apne pass beshak hum unki gand fod shaktey they not a big deal maan le wohlog gunde mawali nahi they lekin baadmein wohlog police k pass jaate then court jaatey media kahaaniyaan banata time waste hota or Sunny ko time mill Jaata issliye bola maine..
Ravi-Bhosdk pata hai kya kya bola unhone mujhe itani kissi k Baap ki naa suni maine.. Ek toh rakh diya tha maine jabdey par lekin maadarchod fir Rohit ne roukliya uske Baad bheed involve hogayi saalon ne mujhe dhakka maara.. Maadarchod ki gand todni hai mujhe.. I don't give a fuck media kya bolta hai waise bhi Humein kabse farak padne laga media kya bolta hai..
Sam-Abe jhantu sun Humaare pass isase bahot badi problem hai jo hai Surendra or hum baar baar usase hatt rahe hain koi naa koi dusare chotey se issue ki wajah se or abhi humlog firse wahi kar rahe hain toh AP ne theek kiya.. Ab bhool Jaa sun pakka Surendra ko niptaake Unki gand fodenge..
Main-Wahi toh bc..
Ravi-Mereko maalum haibe issue bada hai lekin tereko maalum hai meri ego bahot kharaab hai apneko badla caahiye I don't give a fuck..
Main-OK ok chill lelenge badla don't worry.. Thoda shant hojaa chal college chaltey hain..
Ravi-Pakka lega??
Main-Haan.. Aaja..
Maine Haan bola kyunki lawda Ravi Kahaan dhundega ab unhe issliye woh apni jagah khuss or hum Yahaan khuss.. Humne breakfast kiya humari baaton se Ravi kaa mood thoda bahot theek hua Sam Gaadi le aaya or humlog nikale college k liye.. College pohanchey tabtak Ravi munhchodi karta raha ki kya kya karna hai kaise gand Maarni hai unki blah blah.. College pohanchey Gaadi Park ki or aae canteen ki side..
Ravi-Or Haan bhenchod galati bhi unki thi maadarchod bina signal diye right lane Mein ghuss rahe they, bhenchod jhant jaisi bolero leke..
Main - OK ok..
Ravi-Tu Maan nahi raha beshak Rohit se puchlena andar he hoga woh..
Main - Abe Maan gaya..
Ravi-Naa bhosdk sarcastic lerahe ho tum aajao puchwaadunga..
Sam-Chilaa matt be Ladkiyaan hai idhar..
Ravi-Maa chudaae apni..
Ab humlog aae canteen Mein Toh Rohit Akela he baitha tha ek table par shayad humara he wait kar raha tha.. Abhi gang bhi wahin thi.. Anaa ki najar entry maartey he milli mujhse..
Ravi-Khadda kya hai Aa naa gandu..
Ravi mere eye contact ki gand maartey hue chilaaya... Ye maine Pehle Bhi bataaya hai ki Ravi gussa hota hai toh kuch bhi bakdeta hai caahe Saamne koi ho..
Humlog Rohit k pass baithtey..
Ravi-Oye Rohit bataa toh kya hua tha bc.. Galati kiski thi..
Main-Abe tune bataaya woh maan liya maine..
Ravi-Naa bhosdk abtoh ye he bataaega..
Rohit-Aaram se lawde Chilaa kyun raha hai.. Galati toh unki thi boss..
Ravi-Le sun ab chal bhosdk unki gand maarke aatey hain..
Main-Abe chill chill Pagla gaya hai kya aise he kaise maardein dhundaney dey unhe mouka aane dey..
Ashish-Abe kisko fod rahe ho Gurudev..
Ravi-Chup be gandu.. Or tu sun Yahaan baithtey baithtey kaise dhund lenge unhe.. Khadda ho..
Main-Abe mera pair Dard kar raha hai isse toh theek hone dey.. Main dekhlunga tu chill maar..
Ravi-48 ghantey hain tere pass kuch bhi kar unki gand fod dey uske Baad main nahi sunuga teri firr..
Main-OK ok..
48 ghanton Mein 48 baar bhullega ye unhe toh iski haan Mein Haan milana better hai..
Maine sam ko ishaara kiya ki Ravi ko guffa Mein leke Jaa..
Sam-Aao be guffa Mein..
Ravi-Haan bc Kalse naa pee hai..
Main-Main or Rohit aatey hain coffee peeke..
Sam Ravi andar chale gaye..
Main - aaja bahaar aaja Yahaan sunlega ye..
Ye bolke main or Rohit aae canteen k gate par.. Ab piche piche panchayati banke Ashish Lucky or Abhi bhi aae..
Main-Kya karwaadiya be gandu aisa..
Rohit-Kuch nahi be Gaadi thukk gayi aatey time ye bhi add gaya Saamne waale 7 they woh bhi add gaye issne ek ko maara dusare ne isse dhakka maara munhchodi hui ussne kahaa bandey bulaaega or 10 minute Baad unke or 10 aagaye desi log they gaon waale sabko le aae bc then bheed ikatha hogayi toh munhchodi he chali then Tune Vinny wagaairaah ko bhej he diya tha..
Main-Kon they Kahaan k they koi idea??
Rohit-No idea city k nahi they guaranteed...villagers they..
Main-Koi naa bc thode time Mein bhool jaaega ye..
Ab aise jhund ko dekh Anaa Arushi Sana wagaairaah Ladkiyaan bhi aagayi..unhe toh mouka caahiye hota hai gossip kaa..
Arushi-Kya hua Ravi kaise laal hai aaj...
Main-Kuch Khaas nahi..
Ashish-Kal Gaadi thukk gayi toh kissi k sath Ladd padda akela tha karke issliye gussa hai..
Main-Waah bhenchod Doordarshan..
Rohit-Leave it bc itana Yaad naa rakhega ye bhool jaaega bc or Saamne waale toh bhool he gaye honge toh we are fineeeereeee... Arrey bhenchod ye toh wahi log hain..
Rohit ne ishaara kiya toh Saamne se 10-15 hattey kattey londey humari taraf he aarahe they desi they kyunki Pehla toh kapdey desi they then bhenchod dandey bhi desi he they unke ye jaanwar type k dandey they bhenchod .. Oh Fuck no bc.. Fuck no..
Continued.