Incest CHAH AIK KHUBSOORAT PARIWAR KI

[TIPU_SULTAN]

BHAI AGAR UPDATE SAHI NAA LAGE TOU WO BHI KHUL K BATAIN NAA MAIN AAPKE FEEDBACK HI TOU CHAHTA HOON
MAIN JUST LOVE YOU BHAI
YEAH SUPER UPDATE PADHNE HI NAHI AATA MAAIN YAHAN SEEKHNE AAYA HOON YE MERI FIRST STORY WRITING HAI MAIN AGLI STORY MAIN YE GHALTIAN NAHI KRNA CHAHTA SO JO CHEEZ BURI LAGE KHUL K BOLAIN AAPKI AISI SUPPORT SY HI MAIN SEEKHON GAA
YE MERI STORY NAHI AAPKI HAIN MERI STORY TAB TAK HOTI HAI JAB TAK MAIN UPDATE POST KRR NAHI DETA POST KRNE K BAAD YE SAB AAPKA HAI KHUL K BOLAIN MUJHY ACHA LAGE GAA OFCOURSE HAR INSAAN KO TAREEF ACHI LAGTI HAI BUT ISS KA MATLAB YE NAHI K WO JUST TAREEF HI SUNE BALKE USS KO APNI BURAI SUN K APNI GHALTI SUDHARNI BHI CHAHIE
BAAKI Q K YE AIK STORY HAI TOU MERY LIYE YE KOI BURAI NAHI HAI

 

[TIPU_SULTAN]

Bhai last bali bat samjh me nahi aye pese kaha se ayege konsi call ki bat ho rahi he ek bar bahut se gold ki bat hui thi bes par aur nambar ki bat hui lekin pesa kaha se ayega ye samajh me nahi aya

NAA SAMAJH MAIN AAYE TABHI TOU LAST MAIN KI TAA K AAP KO YE BAAT TANG KRY K KAB AAYE GI AGLI UPDATE JISS MAIN AAPKO YE PATA CHALE

 

[Skb21]

Good work ab to magni ka intezar hai waiting for next

 

[lovenaeem88]

Supper fantastic update janab

 

[Mahesh007]

Next

 

[TIPU_SULTAN]

Next

jaanu log abhi tak kasam sy aik lafz bhi nahi likha raat derr tak movie dekhta raha phir soya hoon tou ab uth raha hoon
sunday update hai tou thodi si lambhi bhi deni parni hai so takreban 7 bajy tak ready ho jaaye gi agar sab kuch sahi raha tou

 

[Mahesh007]

Intjar rahega

 

[_ABHAY_Smarty_]

Review....

Koi Update Samjh ke mat padh lena...

Kaafi Time baad review de raha hoon story aapki follow kar raha tha... But Review tabhi sahi nikalta hai jab story thodi aage badhe...

First off all Hat's off Daily Update likhna... Aasan kaam nahi... Kaafi free time chahiye hota hai iske liye saath mai dimag lagana... Plot yaad rakhna... Naam yaad rakhna... Likhna usko... Ufff... Kaafi hectic kaam hai... Aur aap Daily Update de rahe ho... Iske liye appreciation banti hai aapki...

Review Time...

Pehle Story mai Positives par baat kar lete hain...

1 - sabse bada positive iska Daily Update... Hi hai... Jo kam se kam 20 min reading time ke saath aata hai... Jo kaafi bade bade writer's nahi de paate hai aap de rahe hai....

2- story me jiss hisaab se System Mila hero ko.... Hmmm mujhe laga hero Venom na ban jaye... But... Kaafi aachi writing thi aapki...

3- Tipu aur Malika ka Bond abhi tak Highlight hai story ka... Jisko padhne mai kaafi maja aa raha hai... Malika ka pagalpan aur Tipu ka bebak andaaz...

4- Tipu and Sadia ka relation bhi padhne me maja aa raha hai... Maa bete ka rishta... Bina kisi hawas ke... Hmmm... Kaafi rochak hai...

5- System Sadi ke Convo beech mai comedy kaafi majedaar hai... Isse Story me ek aur element add ho jata hai... Jo ki kayi stories mai missing hota hai....

Yeh sab positive part tha story mai jo mujhe abhi tak pasand aaya jiski wajah se story mai juda huun... Baaki negetive nahi sudhaar keh sakte hai unn point par baat karte hai jo kaafi lambe hai... I hope aap dil par nahi lenge meri baaton ko... Sirf aapki writing improve karne ke liye kar raha hoon mai... Qyuki aapki story mai kaafi potential hai joki... New reader's ko jodne mai madat karega... Tou chaliye shuru karte hain...

1- sable pehla point aata hai iska CAPITAL FONT I know aap pehle disclaimer mai explain kar chuke ho... Aap kyun likh kare ho Capital mai but... As Reader mai aapko btana chahunga... Kaafi mushkil hoti hai padhne mai... Qyuki starting se humari Aankhen Capital Font dekh kar kuch alag tareeke se react karti hai... Pata nahi chalta ek word aur dusre word mai gapp... Yeh baat mai reader ke saath saath purana writer hone ke naate keh raha hoon... Kisi aur purane reader se bhi puchnge tou woh yehi kahega... Mujhe kaafi muskil ho rahi padhne mai baaki jaisa aapko theek Lage...

2- Yeh Story starting se Sex Story ke jaise chal rahi hai jisme Humiliation , Pissing , Scat , Torture , Forced jaise scene abhi tak dekhne ko mile hai... Jo ki padhne mai Unique hai but... Rules section ko Kaafi hit kar raha hai... Humiliation, pissing sahi hai baaki Torcher, Forced and Scat Sex... Rules guidelines mai aate hai iska aapko dhyan rakhna hoga... Underage sex se bhi bachna hai koi bhi character 18 se pehle sex nahi karega kisi story mai... Age mention na karna... Se bhi gadbad hone ki sambhavna kaafi jayada hai... Aap part ko edit kar sakte hai... Ek baar rules section ko check karke... Forced , Torcher and Scat kaafi disturbing hota hai... Iss chiz ka khyaal rakhiye...

3- Sex story mai proper Sex scene na hona... Jaisa feel ho Raha hai... Beena Aur Rimsha ke saath first Intimidation kaafi badhiya tha uske baad halaki usme Forced aur Scat bhi tha but padhne mai badhiya laga... Baki Kafisa ke saath First sex badhiya tha... Baaki sab Jagah aisa feel hua ki aapne bas likh Diya... Example:- Bhanu ko kitchen mai Pakda bas Lund daal kar nikal liya...

Story Starting se mai ise sex story ke jaise padh raha hoon na ki Fantasy Supernatural powers waali... Tou aise adhoore Sex hona... Maja nahi aaya Padhne mai ( garam karke thanda hi chodd diye ) Sudhaar isme yehi ho sakta hai... Proper Sex ke saath Gif yaa picture add karna jaise aapne Beena Aur Rimsha ke time kiya tha... Baaki cheezon ke saath Sex bhi important hai iss story ke liye... Baaki Scene kaise likhna hai iske liye aap...

https://xforum.live/threads/gaon-ki-khani.121707/

Isko padh sakte hai aur mujhe yakeen hai aap isse bhi aacha likh Sakte hain...

4- Humara Hero Tipu... Padi Lakdi ander le leta hai... Din par Din Dusman badte jaa rahe hai kon kab badla le le pata nahi... Har Dusre Update mai ek new Villian Add ho jaa raha hai... Isko Story ke liye aacha aur bura dono keh sakte ho... Jaha Malika ke saath Jadap padhne mai maja aata hai wohi MIA ke saath Fijul ki Dushmani... Aur Ek Hacker ka Ek System Owner se jayada powerfull hona.... Tipu ka waha se bhaag Jana... Yeh kuch samjh nhi aaya... Ek System Owner hone ke naate Tipu ko Ek System Owner hi peeche hatne par majbur kar sakta hai... Abhi tou System hone ke bawajood... Usko pakad kar rassi se baandh diya jata hai... Peeta jata hai , itni strength kiss kaam ki Body kiss kaam ki Brown Stroman jaisi ki rassi ko na toad sake hero... Aur System... Khair Brown Stroman ko aapne dekh hoga WWE mai usne Truck palat diya tha... Aur yaha ek Rassi na khol saka kaafi Disappointing tha padhne mai...

5- Pta nahi ek Sorry ke liye Tipu ka Malika ke liye itna Caring aur Pyaar hona... Hmmm iske peeche koi Aur Story hoti Kyun Tipu ko Pyaar hai Malika se... Padhne mai kaafi Maza aayega... Isko Improve kar sakte ho Past ka kuch seen dikha kar... Kyuki Ek Galti maaf kar dene se kisi ko pyaar tou nahi ho jata... Baaki abhi tak aur kuch reveal nahi hua hai... But jaisa padhne ko mila usi hisaab se bataya Maine...

6- Kuch bareekiyan Writer ko behtar se behtareen bana deti hai aapki Story ka Plot se ke timing superb hai aapki writing bhi aachi hai... Magar kiss hisaab se likh rahe ho samne reader ko samjh aayega ki nahi yeh bhi kaafi important hota hai... Jaise ki maine aapko pehle point mai kaha CAPITAL FONT ke saath saath proper spacing bhi hona jaruri hai... Ek sentence se dusre sentence par gapp dena bhi jaroori hai saath mai... Conversation mai Do logo ki baat ho rahi tou pata chalna chahiye pehle ek ne yeh baat boli fir dusre ne yeh... Aapke Update mai uper se neeche tak kahi bhi spacing nahi hai... No doubt update ki length kaafi badhiya hai but aap thoda space de ek paragraph se dusre par jayenge waha bhi thoda gapp denge tou yakeenan writer ke taur par aap kaafi progress karoge... Example ke liye... Mera Review hi le lo... Proper Space ke saath saath aapko Ek Conversation se Dusre mai pata Chala jayega... Likhte aap badhiya ho but likhna kaise hai isper thoda dhyaan dijiye....

7- Last point salah hai meri... Manoge tou kaafi lambi story chalegi aapki yeh saath mai views ke saath saath reader's bhi badhenge... Buss Ek cheez ka Khayal rakhna hai Forced sex aur Rape kaafi thin line hoti hai... Kisi moderator ne pakad liya tou Story ko ban kar dega agar Rape ko dekha gaya tou.... Saath hi pehla Sex Scene jisme Tipu Underage hai usko bhi Edit kar do... Underage Content Likhna tou Kya Photo bhi allow nahi hai forum par... Mai kaafi impressed hoon aapki story se nahi chahunga kisi aise content ke chalte bann ho jaye... Aur Mere saath saath baaki Reader's aur aapka bhi Mood kharab ho... Tou khayal rakhna...

Baaki... Kuch reh tou nahi gaya... Abhi baat karne ke liye... 2013 se story padh raha hoon... Kaafi experience se itne saari baatein aapko kahi hai Bura na maniyega... Aapke ander potential dekha maine story likhne ke liye isliye apko chetane ke saath Salah dena mera farz tha baaki jaisa aapko theek Lage... Koi bhi baat khrab lagi ho tou duman mat samjhiyega... Baaki abhi itna hi tha bolne ko...

Sirf itna hi khunga jate jate...Hope Next Mera jab Review aaye aapki Story par kuch sudhar dekhne ko milega....


Baaki Take care... Best of luck...

 

[TIPU_SULTAN]

Review....

Koi Update Samjh ke mat padh lena...

Kaafi Time baad review de raha hoon story aapki follow kar raha tha... But Review tabhi sahi nikalta hai jab story thodi aage badhe...

First off all Hat's off Daily Update likhna... Aasan kaam nahi... Kaafi free time chahiye hota hai iske liye saath mai dimag lagana... Plot yaad rakhna... Naam yaad rakhna... Likhna usko... Ufff... Kaafi hectic kaam hai... Aur aap Daily Update de rahe ho... Iske liye appreciation banti hai aapki...

Review Time...

Pehle Story mai Positives par baat kar lete hain...

1 - sabse bada positive iska Daily Update... Hi hai... Jo kam se kam 20 min reading time ke saath aata hai... Jo kaafi bade bade writer's nahi de paate hai aap de rahe hai....

2- story me jiss hisaab se System Mila hero ko.... Hmmm mujhe laga hero Venom na ban jaye... But... Kaafi aachi writing thi aapki...

3- Tipu aur Malika ka Bond abhi tak Highlight hai story ka... Jisko padhne mai kaafi maja aa raha hai... Malika ka pagalpan aur Tipu ka bebak andaaz...

4- Tipu and Sadia ka relation bhi padhne me maja aa raha hai... Maa bete ka rishta... Bina kisi hawas ke... Hmmm... Kaafi rochak hai...

5- System Sadi ke Convo beech mai comedy kaafi majedaar hai... Isse Story me ek aur element add ho jata hai... Jo ki kayi stories mai missing hota hai....

Yeh sab positive part tha story mai jo mujhe abhi tak pasand aaya jiski wajah se story mai juda huun... Baaki negetive nahi sudhaar keh sakte hai unn point par baat karte hai jo kaafi lambe hai... I hope aap dil par nahi lenge meri baaton ko... Sirf aapki writing improve karne ke liye kar raha hoon mai... Qyuki aapki story mai kaafi potential hai joki... New reader's ko jodne mai madat karega... Tou chaliye shuru karte hain...

1- sable pehla point aata hai iska CAPITAL FONT I know aap pehle disclaimer mai explain kar chuke ho... Aap kyun likh kare ho Capital mai but... As Reader mai aapko btana chahunga... Kaafi mushkil hoti hai padhne mai... Qyuki starting se humari Aankhen Capital Font dekh kar kuch alag tareeke se react karti hai... Pata nahi chalta ek word aur dusre word mai gapp... Yeh baat mai reader ke saath saath purana writer hone ke naate keh raha hoon... Kisi aur purane reader se bhi puchnge tou woh yehi kahega... Mujhe kaafi muskil ho rahi padhne mai baaki jaisa aapko theek Lage...

2- Yeh Story starting se Sex Story ke jaise chal rahi hai jisme Humiliation , Pissing , Scat , Torture , Forced jaise scene abhi tak dekhne ko mile hai... Jo ki padhne mai Unique hai but... Rules section ko Kaafi hit kar raha hai... Humiliation, pissing sahi hai baaki Torcher, Forced and Scat Sex... Rules guidelines mai aate hai iska aapko dhyan rakhna hoga... Underage sex se bhi bachna hai koi bhi character 18 se pehle sex nahi karega kisi story mai... Age mention na karna... Se bhi gadbad hone ki sambhavna kaafi jayada hai... Aap part ko edit kar sakte hai... Ek baar rules section ko check karke... Forced , Torcher and Scat kaafi disturbing hota hai... Iss chiz ka khyaal rakhiye...

3- Sex story mai proper Sex scene na hona... Jaisa feel ho Raha hai... Beena Aur Rimsha ke saath first Intimidation kaafi badhiya tha uske baad halaki usme Forced aur Scat bhi tha but padhne mai badhiya laga... Baki Kafisa ke saath First sex badhiya tha... Baaki sab Jagah aisa feel hua ki aapne bas likh Diya... Example:- Bhanu ko kitchen mai Pakda bas Lund daal kar nikal liya...

Story Starting se mai ise sex story ke jaise padh raha hoon na ki Fantasy Supernatural powers waali... Tou aise adhoore Sex hona... Maja nahi aaya Padhne mai ( garam karke thanda hi chodd diye ) Sudhaar isme yehi ho sakta hai... Proper Sex ke saath Gif yaa picture add karna jaise aapne Beena Aur Rimsha ke time kiya tha... Baaki cheezon ke saath Sex bhi important hai iss story ke liye... Baaki Scene kaise likhna hai iske liye aap...

https://xforum.live/threads/gaon-ki-khani.121707/

Isko padh sakte hai aur mujhe yakeen hai aap isse bhi aacha likh Sakte hain...

4- Humara Hero Tipu... Padi Lakdi ander le leta hai... Din par Din Dusman badte jaa rahe hai kon kab badla le le pata nahi... Har Dusre Update mai ek new Villian Add ho jaa raha hai... Isko Story ke liye aacha aur bura dono keh sakte ho... Jaha Malika ke saath Jadap padhne mai maja aata hai wohi MIA ke saath Fijul ki Dushmani... Aur Ek Hacker ka Ek System Owner se jayada powerfull hona.... Tipu ka waha se bhaag Jana... Yeh kuch samjh nhi aaya... Ek System Owner hone ke naate Tipu ko Ek System Owner hi peeche hatne par majbur kar sakta hai... Abhi tou System hone ke bawajood... Usko pakad kar rassi se baandh diya jata hai... Peeta jata hai , itni strength kiss kaam ki Body kiss kaam ki Brown Stroman jaisi ki rassi ko na toad sake hero... Aur System... Khair Brown Stroman ko aapne dekh hoga WWE mai usne Truck palat diya tha... Aur yaha ek Rassi na khol saka kaafi Disappointing tha padhne mai...

5- Pta nahi ek Sorry ke liye Tipu ka Malika ke liye itna Caring aur Pyaar hona... Hmmm iske peeche koi Aur Story hoti Kyun Tipu ko Pyaar hai Malika se... Padhne mai kaafi Maza aayega... Isko Improve kar sakte ho Past ka kuch seen dikha kar... Kyuki Ek Galti maaf kar dene se kisi ko pyaar tou nahi ho jata... Baaki abhi tak aur kuch reveal nahi hua hai... But jaisa padhne ko mila usi hisaab se bataya Maine...

6- Kuch bareekiyan Writer ko behtar se behtareen bana deti hai aapki Story ka Plot se ke timing superb hai aapki writing bhi aachi hai... Magar kiss hisaab se likh rahe ho samne reader ko samjh aayega ki nahi yeh bhi kaafi important hota hai... Jaise ki maine aapko pehle point mai kaha CAPITAL FONT ke saath saath proper spacing bhi hona jaruri hai... Ek sentence se dusre sentence par gapp dena bhi jaroori hai saath mai... Conversation mai Do logo ki baat ho rahi tou pata chalna chahiye pehle ek ne yeh baat boli fir dusre ne yeh... Aapke Update mai uper se neeche tak kahi bhi spacing nahi hai... No doubt update ki length kaafi badhiya hai but aap thoda space de ek paragraph se dusre par jayenge waha bhi thoda gapp denge tou yakeenan writer ke taur par aap kaafi progress karoge... Example ke liye... Mera Review hi le lo... Proper Space ke saath saath aapko Ek Conversation se Dusre mai pata Chala jayega... Likhte aap badhiya ho but likhna kaise hai isper thoda dhyaan dijiye....

7- Last point salah hai meri... Manoge tou kaafi lambi story chalegi aapki yeh saath mai views ke saath saath reader's bhi badhenge... Buss Ek cheez ka Khayal rakhna hai Forced sex aur Rape kaafi thin line hoti hai... Kisi moderator ne pakad liya tou Story ko ban kar dega agar Rape ko dekha gaya tou.... Saath hi pehla Sex Scene jisme Tipu Underage hai usko bhi Edit kar do... Underage Content Likhna tou Kya Photo bhi allow nahi hai forum par... Mai kaafi impressed hoon aapki story se nahi chahunga kisi aise content ke chalte bann ho jaye... Aur Mere saath saath baaki Reader's aur aapka bhi Mood kharab ho... Tou khayal rakhna...

Baaki... Kuch reh tou nahi gaya... Abhi baat karne ke liye... 2013 se story padh raha hoon... Kaafi experience se itne saari baatein aapko kahi hai Bura na maniyega... Aapke ander potential dekha maine story likhne ke liye isliye apko chetane ke saath Salah dena mera farz tha baaki jaisa aapko theek Lage... Koi bhi baat khrab lagi ho tou duman mat samjhiyega... Baaki abhi itna hi tha bolne ko...

Sirf itna hi khunga jate jate...Hope Next Mera jab Review aaye aapki Story par kuch sudhar dekhne ko milega....


Baaki Take care... Best of luck...

mera khud ka tarah nikal gaya k ye kia meri story prr kon update post krr gaya jab ooper k kr k dekha tou review likha huwa tha tab jaa k sakoon mila abhi padh k baaki batata hoon

 

[TIPU_SULTAN]

time ki baat ki jaaye tou main aik college main parhta hoon issi wajah sy time hota hai q k uss k ilaawa koi kaam nahi hota mujh ko baaki haan meri yaadasht kaafi kamzor hai issi wajah sy main kai baar plot bhool jaata hoon yahan tak k update 3 ka 5 main bhool jaon gaa uss k liye wapis sy phir mujhy jaldi jaldi wo jagah dhoondni padti hai aur uss ko parh k kuch samjh aati hai tab jaa k continue krta hoon

 

[TIPU_SULTAN]

asal main yaar mera khayal hai mujhy font style change krna chahiye like abhi main ye sab small letters main likh raha hoon tou wo saali neechy line aa jaati hai ghalat wali uss wajah sy mera dhyaan baar baar uss par jaata hai

1 BAAKI AGAR ISS TYPE KA FONT RAKHON TOU KIA SAHI RAHEGA ?
2 BAAKI AGAR ISS TYPE KA FONT RAKHON TOU KIA SAHI RAHEGA ?