Romance Ek Ajeeb si love story (completed)

[Notebook]

Next update kab dy rahe ho

Posted dear

 

[Casinar]

Update # 27




Naqabposh - ek galti tum dono ki jaan le sakti hai .

Naqabposh bol hi raha tha ki peechhe se uske sar par Himansh ne kartik ke bat se jor dar war kiya . Naqab posh cheekha aur uski awaaj sun kar Himansh aur Reveka buri tarah chaunk gaye .


Himansh - tu ??????? Tu to Monty hai bey ?


Monty - hhhhaan (darte huye)


Himansh- tune fir dikha di awkaat , saale jaan se maar doonga ( jordar ghoonsa )


Monty - dekh to le bhai nakli gun ke sath aaya hoon aur mera sir fod diya .

Muh se khoon bahne laga tha .



Himansh - tum jaise logon ka kya bharosa . Utha le jate mera bachcha badla poora karne ke liye.

Gurrate huye .


Monty - kitni baar bolu bhai galti huyi . Bhej de jail lekin abb ye tano se jakhm dena chhod de . Baki ye charo apne dost hi hain jo mere sath aaye hain bhai . Poochh le inse mai sirf tujhse aur Pari ji se mafi mangne aaya hoon .

Charon ne jab naqab utara to wo Himansh ke dost the .



Himansh - Pari ka naam to le na apni gandi juban se baki mai itna mahan nahi hoon jo mai tum jaise aadam khoron ko maaf karoon . Mera wash chale to mai abhi ke abhi faad doon tujhe .

Himansh ka ye roop dekh sabhi stabdh the . Abb tak Pari bhi aa chuki thi aur Kartik ko seene se chipkaye mahaul ko samjhne ki koshish kar rahi thi .


Monty - bhai Reveka ko to mil gayi mafi isi lalach me aa gaya ki shayad mere liye bhi thoda sa koi kona bacha ho teri dosti ka . Abb is apradhbodh ke sath nahi jiya jata hai .



Himansh - mera koi dost nahi hai abb aur Reveka ko Pari ne maaf kiya hai maine nahi . Mere liye wo 5 saal pahle hi mar chuki hai . Reveka meri life ki sabse badi galti thi jise maine paise dekar khareeda tha wo bhi apni jindgi barbad karne ko . Meri har buri lat Reveka ki shohbat ki wajah se thi . Jab bhi mai koi sudhrne wali baat karta to bhatkane ka idea Reveka ka hota tha . Pari ke aane ke baad maine jana ki ladkiyan bin paison ke bhi dosti kar sakti hain . Mujge Pari ne samjhaya ki jeene ka saleeka kya hota hai .




Reveka - sssorryyy Himansh please mujhe maaf kar do please .

Reveka hichkiyan lekar rone lagi .



Monty - ham dono apni galti par behad sharminda hain yaar please ek mauka to de do please .

Himansh gusse me kuchh bolne ja raha tha tabhi uski najar Pari aur Kartik par padi . Sab kuchh to tha aaj uske paas . Upar se Pari ne hi use sikhaya tha ki maafi to har gunaah ki hoti hai .


Himansh - Pari mera sir dukh raha hai mai apne room me ja raha hoon . Sabhi ke liye achha sa chai- nashta organise karwa do aur guest room khulwa dena .


Pal bhar me sara mahaul badal chuka tha . Monty ke chehre par gahra sokoon tha jabki Reveka Pari ke gale lag kar subak rahi thi thi .




Ek baar fir sab kuchh khoobsurat ho gaya tha . Kartik sabhi ke haanthon ka khilauna bana kood raha tha aur Himansh apni bina pankhon wali Pari ke hauslon ki udan se sawara apna ghar nihar raha tha . Use apni Ajeeb si love story par hasi aa rahi thi jo ek jidd se shuru hokar jidd ka sarwnash kar chuki thi .






" The end "

Notebook bhai last update mein aap ne pucha tha nah ke kia main aguey ki update ko guess kar sakta hoon, tab main ne kaha tha ke kuch bhi ho sakta hai koyi bhi twist ho sakta hai.....
ab batata hoon kia socha tha main ne kyunke aap ne kahani ka end hi kar diya, yeh to bilkool bhi nahin socha tha ke aap iss tarah se issko end karoge..... mere khayaal se to, aur mere guess se yeh hona tha :
Monty ko hi guess kiya tha main ne as nakabposh..... aur ussko Reveka ne hi kaha tha wahan aane ko, aur bache ko kidnap karke aur paisa einthne ke liye.... yeh tha mera guess.....
aap positive person hongue issi liye sab sahi socha aap ne aur happy ending karwaayi... magar happy ending tab bhi hota jab bure logon ka bura natija hota.
main ne zindagi mein itne negative logon ko dekha aur jaana hai aur jo kabhi nahin sudhre hein ke mere liye bura ka anth bura hi hona chahiye.... main eise logon par bilkool yaheen nahin karta jissne pehle sab kuch bura kiya aur baad mein aakar ghusste hein achah banne aur acha dikhaane ke liye iss liye mere liye jissko jail ka darwaza dikhana hai ussko wahin jana hai, jissko nark mein jana hai agar ussko swarg lejaane lage to nark bandh ho jaega..... mera khayaal eisa hai.
main ne bahut barson se dekha hai aur dekhta aa raha hoon ke bura ka anth bura hi hota hai aur wo issi dunya mein hota hai.
khair aap positive insaan honge issi liye aap ne sabko ek saath joda, ussko bhi jissne shuru se himansh ko barbaad kiya aur karna chaaha.....
magar ek baat ki bahot khushi hui mujhe jab Hiamnsh ne yeh sab kaha: "mera koi dost nahi hai abb aur Reveka ko Pari ne maaf kiya hai maine nahi . Mere liye wo 5 saal pahle hi mar chuki hai . Reveka meri life ki sabse badi galti thi jise maine paise dekar khareeda tha wo bhi apni jindgi barbad karne ko . Meri har buri lat Reveka ki shohbat ki wajah se thi . Jab bhi mai koi sudhrne wali baat karta to bhatkane ka idea Reveka ka hota tha . Pari ke aane ke baad maine jana ki ladkiyan bin paison ke bhi dosti kar sakti hain . Mujge Pari ne samjhaya ki jeene ka saleeka kya hota hai ."

inn sab ke ilawa kahani bahot achcha tha magar aur bhi bahot ziada achah ho sakta tha. last 4 updates mein aap ne shaayad jaldbaazi kar diya issko end karne ke liye varna aur bhi bahot hi acha ho sakta tha..... pehle ke 20 updates ko aap ne jiss tarah se araam aur sukoon se likha tha wo nahin nazar aaye last ke 4 updates mein..... jiss pace se yeh kahani chal rahi thi behad shaandaar tha aur mere point of view se end hote hote yeh kuch kharaab hone laga - ghaur se padhiye main ne nahin kaha ke kahani kharaab hai balke main ne yeh kaha bahot achi kahani hai magar aap ne isska treatment end tak aate aate kuch bigaar sa diya.... yeh main ek lekhak ke point of view se keh raha hoon. kahani sach mein aur bhi bahut behtar ho sakta tha.
aap imaandaari se kehiye kia aap ne sab kuch jaldbaazi mein nahin end kiya? kia aap ke paas time nahin hone ke kaaran issko jaldi end nahin kiya? agar yeh baat hai to phir main sahi hoon, ke kahani aur bahot hi behtar ho sakta tha. iss mein great potential hai ek best kahani hone ki.
Anyway, thank you very much for this beautiful love story jo main ne passand kiya aur iss forum par yeh pehli kahani hai jiss ko main ne end tak padha aur comment kiya har ek update par.
Agar aap phir kabhi likhen to araam se, sab kuch ek taraf karke, apne tensions ko bhool kar , 100% sirf kahani par concentrate karen aur likhte waqt sabhi characters mein doob kar likhiye, tab kahani zaroor behtareen end tak jaega.
anyhow, thanks and congrats for the lovely story.
umeed hai ap ko phir padhne ka mauka mile.

 

[Notebook]

Notebook bhai last update mein aap ne pucha tha nah ke kia main aguey ki update ko guess kar sakta hoon, tab main ne kaha tha ke kuch bhi ho sakta hai koyi bhi twist ho sakta hai.....
ab batata hoon kia socha tha main ne kyunke aap ne kahani ka end hi kar diya, yeh to bilkool bhi nahin socha tha ke aap iss tarah se issko end karoge..... mere khayaal se to, aur mere guess se yeh hona tha :
Monty ko hi guess kiya tha main ne as nakabposh..... aur ussko Reveka ne hi kaha tha wahan aane ko, aur bache ko kidnap karke aur paisa einthne ke liye.... yeh tha mera guess.....
aap positive person hongue issi liye sab sahi socha aap ne aur happy ending karwaayi... magar happy ending tab bhi hota jab bure logon ka bura natija hota.
main ne zindagi mein itne negative logon ko dekha aur jaana hai aur jo kabhi nahin sudhre hein ke mere liye bura ka anth bura hi hona chahiye.... main eise logon par bilkool yaheen nahin karta jissne pehle sab kuch bura kiya aur baad mein aakar ghusste hein achah banne aur acha dikhaane ke liye iss liye mere liye jissko jail ka darwaza dikhana hai ussko wahin jana hai, jissko nark mein jana hai agar ussko swarg lejaane lage to nark bandh ho jaega..... mera khayaal eisa hai.
main ne bahut barson se dekha hai aur dekhta aa raha hoon ke bura ka anth bura hi hota hai aur wo issi dunya mein hota hai.
khair aap positive insaan honge issi liye aap ne sabko ek saath joda, ussko bhi jissne shuru se himansh ko barbaad kiya aur karna chaaha.....
magar ek baat ki bahot khushi hui mujhe jab Hiamnsh ne yeh sab kaha: "mera koi dost nahi hai abb aur Reveka ko Pari ne maaf kiya hai maine nahi . Mere liye wo 5 saal pahle hi mar chuki hai . Reveka meri life ki sabse badi galti thi jise maine paise dekar khareeda tha wo bhi apni jindgi barbad karne ko . Meri har buri lat Reveka ki shohbat ki wajah se thi . Jab bhi mai koi sudhrne wali baat karta to bhatkane ka idea Reveka ka hota tha . Pari ke aane ke baad maine jana ki ladkiyan bin paison ke bhi dosti kar sakti hain . Mujge Pari ne samjhaya ki jeene ka saleeka kya hota hai ."

inn sab ke ilawa kahani bahot achcha tha magar aur bhi bahot ziada achah ho sakta tha. last 4 updates mein aap ne shaayad jaldbaazi kar diya issko end karne ke liye varna aur bhi bahot hi acha ho sakta tha..... pehle ke 20 updates ko aap ne jiss tarah se araam aur sukoon se likha tha wo nahin nazar aaye last ke 4 updates mein..... jiss pace se yeh kahani chal rahi thi behad shaandaar tha aur mere point of view se end hote hote yeh kuch kharaab hone laga - ghaur se padhiye main ne nahin kaha ke kahani kharaab hai balke main ne yeh kaha bahot achi kahani hai magar aap ne isska treatment end tak aate aate kuch bigaar sa diya.... yeh main ek lekhak ke point of view se keh raha hoon. kahani sach mein aur bhi bahut behtar ho sakta tha.
aap imaandaari se kehiye kia aap ne sab kuch jaldbaazi mein nahin end kiya? kia aap ke paas time nahin hone ke kaaran issko jaldi end nahin kiya? agar yeh baat hai to phir main sahi hoon, ke kahani aur bahot hi behtar ho sakta tha. iss mein great potential hai ek best kahani hone ki.
Anyway, thank you very much for this beautiful love story jo main ne passand kiya aur iss forum par yeh pehli kahani hai jiss ko main ne end tak padha aur comment kiya har ek update par.
Agar aap phir kabhi likhen to araam se, sab kuch ek taraf karke, apne tensions ko bhool kar , 100% sirf kahani par concentrate karen aur likhte waqt sabhi characters mein doob kar likhiye, tab kahani zaroor behtareen end tak jaega.
anyhow, thanks and congrats for the lovely story.
umeed hai ap ko phir padhne ka mauka mile.

Sir mai aap ki har baat se sahmat hoon . Hmm story fast lag sakti hai kyu ki jab maine aap sabhi logon ko dekh kar story likhne ka socha to matra 10 updates ka plan lekar chala tha lekin readers ka responce dekh kar aur updates ki chhoti lenth story ko 27 updates tak layi .


Jahan tak Monty aur Reveka ka kidnapping ke jariye paisa einthne wali baat thi to gaur kijiyega ki wo log koi aapradhik gatividhi wale nahi hain na hi below middile class . Wo dono khate peete ghar ke aur apne pairon par khade log hain . Unki galti to ye hai ki wo pyaar jaise rishte ko chheen kar pana chah rahe hain aur iske liye bachkani chal chal rahe hain .

Jahan tak extreme level positive hone ki baat hai to Nahi mai itna bhi possitive insan nahi hoon ki bhagwan ki tarah sabhi ko maaf kar doon lekin aap hi bataiye ki jo sudharna chahta ho uske liye kya saja hogi .

Himansh ne jo bhi kaha uski apni feelings thi . Mera khud ka nature Himansh ki tarah hai .

Wakt ka koi issue nahi hai sir Khair aap ne mera bahut sath diya aur saraha mai iske liye aap ka bahut bahut shukra gujar hoon . Mai koshish karoonga ki agli story aap ki salaah ke anuroop dhal sakoon .

 

[Casinar]

Sir mai aap ki har baat se sahmat hoon . Hmm story fast lag sakti hai kyu ki jab maine aap sabhi logon ko dekh kar story likhne ka socha to matra 10 updates ka plan lekar chala tha lekin readers ka responce dekh kar aur updates ki chhoti lenth story ko 27 updates tak layi .


Jahan tak Monty aur Reveka ka kidnapping ke jariye paisa einthne wali baat thi to gaur kijiyega ki wo log koi aapradhik gatividhi wale nahi hain na hi below middile class . Wo dono khate peete ghar ke aur apne pairon par khade log hain . Unki galti to ye hai ki wo pyaar jaise rishte ko chheen kar pana chah rahe hain aur iske liye bachkani chal chal rahe hain .

Jahan tak extreme level positive hone ki baat hai to Nahi mai itna bhi possitive insan nahi hoon ki bhagwan ki tarah sabhi ko maaf kar doon lekin aap hi bataiye ki jo sudharna chahta ho uske liye kya saja hogi .

Himansh ne jo bhi kaha uski apni feelings thi . Mera khud ka nature Himansh ki tarah hai .

Wakt ka koi issue nahi hai sir Khair aap ne mera bahut sath diya aur saraha mai iske liye aap ka bahut bahut shukra gujar hoon . Mai koshish karoonga ki agli story aap ki salaah ke anuroop dhal sakoon .

Shukriya bhai, mujhe umeed hai ke aap ko bura nahin laga main ne itna kuch keh diya, buss jo laga wohi saaf saaf likh dala main ne. mjjhe aap ko takliff dene ya feel karane ki koyi matlab nahin, buss jo feel hua wohi kaha kahani ke bare mein...
mujhe aap ko dobara padhne ki ichah hai, umeed hai aap jald hi koyi nayi story start karo.
thanks very much for understanding.

 

[Aakash.]

Notebook bro,You have written a very good update. I did not think that the story would end so soon, well no problem you have finished the story.I hope you will present a new story to us soon. Thank you.......

 

[Notebook]

Shukriya bhai, mujhe umeed hai ke aap ko bura nahin laga main ne itna kuch keh diya, buss jo laga wohi saaf saaf likh dala main ne. mjjhe aap ko takliff dene ya feel karane ki koyi matlab nahin, buss jo feel hua wohi kahani kahani ke bare mein...
mujhe aap ko dobara padhne ki ichah hai, umeed hai aap jald hi koyi nayi story start karo.
thanks very much for understanding.

Bura manne jaisi koi baat likhi hi nahi thi aap ne sir bas 10 updates ko 27 karne par thoda sa to idhar udhar ho hi jata hai . Thanks again

 

[Mbindas]

Bohot hi achchhi story rahi ye.

 

[Pondy]

Bohat aachi aur pyara kahani laga ye

 

[Assassin]

Update # 27




Naqabposh - ek galti tum dono ki jaan le sakti hai .

Naqabposh bol hi raha tha ki peechhe se uske sar par Himansh ne kartik ke bat se jor dar war kiya . Naqab posh cheekha aur uski awaaj sun kar Himansh aur Reveka buri tarah chaunk gaye .


Himansh - tu ??????? Tu to Monty hai bey ?


Monty - hhhhaan (darte huye)


Himansh- tune fir dikha di awkaat , saale jaan se maar doonga ( jordar ghoonsa )


Monty - dekh to le bhai nakli gun ke sath aaya hoon aur mera sir fod diya .

Muh se khoon bahne laga tha .



Himansh - tum jaise logon ka kya bharosa . Utha le jate mera bachcha badla poora karne ke liye.

Gurrate huye .


Monty - kitni baar bolu bhai galti huyi . Bhej de jail lekin abb ye tano se jakhm dena chhod de . Baki ye charo apne dost hi hain jo mere sath aaye hain bhai . Poochh le inse mai sirf tujhse aur Pari ji se mafi mangne aaya hoon .

Charon ne jab naqab utara to wo Himansh ke dost the .



Himansh - Pari ka naam to le na apni gandi juban se baki mai itna mahan nahi hoon jo mai tum jaise aadam khoron ko maaf karoon . Mera wash chale to mai abhi ke abhi faad doon tujhe .

Himansh ka ye roop dekh sabhi stabdh the . Abb tak Pari bhi aa chuki thi aur Kartik ko seene se chipkaye mahaul ko samjhne ki koshish kar rahi thi .


Monty - bhai Reveka ko to mil gayi mafi isi lalach me aa gaya ki shayad mere liye bhi thoda sa koi kona bacha ho teri dosti ka . Abb is apradhbodh ke sath nahi jiya jata hai .



Himansh - mera koi dost nahi hai abb aur Reveka ko Pari ne maaf kiya hai maine nahi . Mere liye wo 5 saal pahle hi mar chuki hai . Reveka meri life ki sabse badi galti thi jise maine paise dekar khareeda tha wo bhi apni jindgi barbad karne ko . Meri har buri lat Reveka ki shohbat ki wajah se thi . Jab bhi mai koi sudhrne wali baat karta to bhatkane ka idea Reveka ka hota tha . Pari ke aane ke baad maine jana ki ladkiyan bin paison ke bhi dosti kar sakti hain . Mujge Pari ne samjhaya ki jeene ka saleeka kya hota hai .




Reveka - sssorryyy Himansh please mujhe maaf kar do please .

Reveka hichkiyan lekar rone lagi .



Monty - ham dono apni galti par behad sharminda hain yaar please ek mauka to de do please .

Himansh gusse me kuchh bolne ja raha tha tabhi uski najar Pari aur Kartik par padi . Sab kuchh to tha aaj uske paas . Upar se Pari ne hi use sikhaya tha ki maafi to har gunaah ki hoti hai .


Himansh - Pari mera sir dukh raha hai mai apne room me ja raha hoon . Sabhi ke liye achha sa chai- nashta organise karwa do aur guest room khulwa dena .


Pal bhar me sara mahaul badal chuka tha . Monty ke chehre par gahra sokoon tha jabki Reveka Pari ke gale lag kar subak rahi thi thi .




Ek baar fir sab kuchh khoobsurat ho gaya tha . Kartik sabhi ke haanthon ka khilauna bana kood raha tha aur Himansh apni bina pankhon wali Pari ke hauslon ki udan se sawara apna ghar nihar raha tha . Use apni Ajeeb si love story par hasi aa rahi thi jo ek jidd se shuru hokar jidd ka sarwnash kar chuki thi .






" The end "

End unexpected tha par achha laga

 

[PARADOX]

for completed the story....