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Verma ji uthe rehna Ajj ..update aate rahenge...
Adultery Meri fantasy ( Adultery/Romance)
- Thread starterFlymovers777
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Khushinaik981
Member
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YesBro I agree with you100%.but we need to remember Ravi's age right now..its just 16..so we can't accept much more maturity as compare of other characters...,while this is the reason that he quarrel with his sister and deepika regularly..it 's show lack of maturity...
In the story Ravi is not a super hero type..who has no impurity...he is a normal guy..and he will learn slowly slowly...and will fight against Gupta or any other else...
..i want to write a story which have no artificial characters...like Bollywood movies...
It should be close to the nature...that's why Ravi seems Unmatured in the story....
Thank you bro to give your outputs...
Thanks again...hope you will be understand...
I know it will take time to develop his character I was just pointing out after reading other's comments
I know slowly you're building story and developing each character to their potential.
All the best
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Tabhi Ravi uske bagal m aa gya ...
Ravi ne ek gehri saans li or takiya pith ke piche lagya or sunita ke bagal m beth gya....
Ab aage:::
Sunita ko pasina aane laga...
Ravi ne to apna muh hi sunita ki or kar diya...
Or usko ji bhar ke dekhne laga...
Sir m pallu rakh ke sunita bilkul ek nayi naveli dulhan ki tarah lag rahi thi....
Sunita ke honth kamp rahe the...ravi ke Ase dekh e se...
Usne tv ke ujale m ek baar ravi ko dekha or fir jhat se tv ko dekhne lagi...
Ravi to pura full tha...to usne sidha sunita ka right hath pakada...or uske hath ko chumte or masalte hue uske sath tv dekhne laga...
Sunita ki saans ab thoda normal hone lagi thi ...
Ravi ne fir uski finger ko Apne muh m dal diya or tv dekhte hue middle finger chusne laga ...
Sunita ke liye ye pehla anubhav tha .
Usne apna sir pichhe diwar m tika diya or gardan thoda upper karke tv ko dekhne lagi...
Ravi ne fir uski index finger bhi muh m daL di...or chusne laga pyar se...
Sunita ne ab per sidhe kar diye jo ab tak mod ke rakhe the....
Ye ek tarah se uska signal hi tha ..
Ab sunita ke mame jo abhi tak ghutne se chhupe the ravi ke samne the...
Ravi ne ek bar bablu ko dekha wo tv dekh e m bussy tha...
Ravi or sunita.bablu ke per ke side.ko niche ki or diwar ka sahara le kar bethe the....
Ravi ne apne dono hath se sunita ki nazuk kamar ko pakad or..jo gardan sunita ne upeer ko ki thi ..waha pe ek jhannatedar chumban le liya...
Sunita puri kamp gayi...
Or gardan left side kar di...
Ravi bethe bethe hi uski kamar dono hath se pakad ke uski gardan ke right side ki chumane laga....or apni garm saans se chorne laga....
Ravi to aisa kar raha tha jaise...pehle apni saans se gardan ko garam kar raha ho or fir waha pe chumban de kar thanda...
Sunita bas halke halke aawaz nikal rahi thi wo asi thi...
S:: unnnnnhhhhh....unnnnhhhhhhh....hmmmmmm...unnnhhh....siiiiiii...unnnhhhhh.....babbluuu...hhhhhhhh......abhiiiii...siiiii unhhh..
Tab ravi piche hatha or balu ko dekha wo movie dekh raha tha to...
Fir left hath jo abhi tak kamar m tha sunita ke right boobs ke upper rakha blouse ke upper se or dabane laga ..to is bar sunita ne left side ko gardan ghuma di..or ravi betha bhi left side hi tha sunita ke...
Or right mamma dabate hue..right side gardan m apna chumban jadd diya...
Sunita ki gardan ravi ke thuk se or blouse or bra uske nikalte dudh se gilaa.. hone lage...
Sunita bhi ab apni jawani ka Mazza lene lagi...or
Unnnhhh...unnnhhhhh ....mmmmsiiiiii...unnnhhh karte hue...ravi ke sath sambhog ki prarambhik kriya m vyast thi .
.wo bhul gayi ki uski room mor usi bed m uska ek *** saal ka beta soya h or ek ***saal ka beta tv dekh raha h ...
Tabhi Ravi ne uske per ke upper ek per dala or fir apna left haath jo boobs m tha ..kamar m le gya or dono hathon se kamar ko dabate hue..
Boluse or bra ke bhar se hi...right bobs muh m bharne ki nakam koshish karte hue nipple ke pass chusne laga.....
or sath m kamar pe jo hath the ..unko hips m le ja ke hipps ke upper ke hisse matlb ki kamar se thoda niche le ja ke dabane laga payar se....
Ravi ne ek gehri saans li or takiya pith ke piche lagya or sunita ke bagal m beth gya....
Ab aage:::
Sunita ko pasina aane laga...
Ravi ne to apna muh hi sunita ki or kar diya...
Or usko ji bhar ke dekhne laga...
Sir m pallu rakh ke sunita bilkul ek nayi naveli dulhan ki tarah lag rahi thi....
Sunita ke honth kamp rahe the...ravi ke Ase dekh e se...
Usne tv ke ujale m ek baar ravi ko dekha or fir jhat se tv ko dekhne lagi...
Ravi to pura full tha...to usne sidha sunita ka right hath pakada...or uske hath ko chumte or masalte hue uske sath tv dekhne laga...
Sunita ki saans ab thoda normal hone lagi thi ...
Ravi ne fir uski finger ko Apne muh m dal diya or tv dekhte hue middle finger chusne laga ...
Sunita ke liye ye pehla anubhav tha .
Usne apna sir pichhe diwar m tika diya or gardan thoda upper karke tv ko dekhne lagi...
Ravi ne fir uski index finger bhi muh m daL di...or chusne laga pyar se...
Sunita ne ab per sidhe kar diye jo ab tak mod ke rakhe the....
Ye ek tarah se uska signal hi tha ..
Ab sunita ke mame jo abhi tak ghutne se chhupe the ravi ke samne the...
Ravi ne ek bar bablu ko dekha wo tv dekh e m bussy tha...
Ravi or sunita.bablu ke per ke side.ko niche ki or diwar ka sahara le kar bethe the....
Ravi ne apne dono hath se sunita ki nazuk kamar ko pakad or..jo gardan sunita ne upeer ko ki thi ..waha pe ek jhannatedar chumban le liya...
Sunita puri kamp gayi...
Or gardan left side kar di...
Ravi bethe bethe hi uski kamar dono hath se pakad ke uski gardan ke right side ki chumane laga....or apni garm saans se chorne laga....
Ravi to aisa kar raha tha jaise...pehle apni saans se gardan ko garam kar raha ho or fir waha pe chumban de kar thanda...
Sunita bas halke halke aawaz nikal rahi thi wo asi thi...
S:: unnnnnhhhhh....unnnnhhhhhhh....hmmmmmm...unnnhhh....siiiiiii...unnnhhhhh.....babbluuu...hhhhhhhh......abhiiiii...siiiii unhhh..
Tab ravi piche hatha or balu ko dekha wo movie dekh raha tha to...
Fir left hath jo abhi tak kamar m tha sunita ke right boobs ke upper rakha blouse ke upper se or dabane laga ..to is bar sunita ne left side ko gardan ghuma di..or ravi betha bhi left side hi tha sunita ke...
Or right mamma dabate hue..right side gardan m apna chumban jadd diya...
Sunita ki gardan ravi ke thuk se or blouse or bra uske nikalte dudh se gilaa.. hone lage...
Sunita bhi ab apni jawani ka Mazza lene lagi...or
Unnnhhh...unnnhhhhh ....mmmmsiiiiii...unnnhhh karte hue...ravi ke sath sambhog ki prarambhik kriya m vyast thi .
.wo bhul gayi ki uski room mor usi bed m uska ek *** saal ka beta soya h or ek ***saal ka beta tv dekh raha h ...
Tabhi Ravi ne uske per ke upper ek per dala or fir apna left haath jo boobs m tha ..kamar m le gya or dono hathon se kamar ko dabate hue..
Boluse or bra ke bhar se hi...right bobs muh m bharne ki nakam koshish karte hue nipple ke pass chusne laga.....
or sath m kamar pe jo hath the ..unko hips m le ja ke hipps ke upper ke hisse matlb ki kamar se thoda niche le ja ke dabane laga payar se....
Last edited:
aalu
Well-Known Member
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bhai tum kamal karte ho... you can display a wonderful erotica.... honestly speaking... shuruat mein kuchh scenes ko samjhane ke liye tumhe alag se point out karna parta tha... lekin ab bas flow mein likhte jaa rahe ho... and you are getting damn good at it.... badhte update ke saath behatar hote jaa rahe ho....
chhoti details pe jo gaur kar ke likhna bhi reality se jor ke rakhta hain padhte hue... kuchh ghatna aisa lagta hain jaise khud ke saath ghati hui padh raha hoon... khaskar yeh tv wala kaand kayee baar ho chuka hain...
... mujhe toh lagta hain launda apna personal experience ravi ke naam pe likh raha hain...... kyunki aisi tharkee harkate humne bhi kari hain... aur reality mein log aaise hi aage badhte hain sidhe jaa ke chod nahin lete hain...
ek dum se pehli baar mein himmat na hoti hain... jaan ke bhi anjan bante hue saare kaam karte rahna unglio ka ulajhna sunita ka wo dar ke simatna aane waale pal ko soch ke... ajeeb sa maza purane yaade lauta dee hain bhai tumne...
love your writing...
chhoti details pe jo gaur kar ke likhna bhi reality se jor ke rakhta hain padhte hue... kuchh ghatna aisa lagta hain jaise khud ke saath ghati hui padh raha hoon... khaskar yeh tv wala kaand kayee baar ho chuka hain...
... mujhe toh lagta hain launda apna personal experience ravi ke naam pe likh raha hain...... kyunki aisi tharkee harkate humne bhi kari hain... aur reality mein log aaise hi aage badhte hain sidhe jaa ke chod nahin lete hain...ek dum se pehli baar mein himmat na hoti hain... jaan ke bhi anjan bante hue saare kaam karte rahna unglio ka ulajhna sunita ka wo dar ke simatna aane waale pal ko soch ke... ajeeb sa maza purane yaade lauta dee hain bhai tumne...
love your writing...
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Boluse or bra ke bhar se hi...right bobs muh m bharne ki nakam koshish karte hue nipple ke pass chusne laga.....
or sath m kamar pe jo hath the ..unko hips m le ja ke hipps ke upper ke hisse matlb ki kamar se thoda niche le ja ke dabane laga payar se....
Ab aage::::
Sunita ke sharir m masti ki lehar daud gayi...wo ek haath se ravi ke baal sehlate to dusre hath se bed ki chadar or adh khuli aankho se tv or bablu ko dekhti....
Or dhire dhire masti m awaz nikal rahi thi...
Sunita Ka to abhi se ye haal tha...abhi main chizz to bachi hi hui thi...jha tak abhi ravi gaya hi nhi tha...
Fir ravi thoda upper ho ke sunita ke bagal me betha or sunita ka blouse ka button kholne laga.
To sunita dhire se boli ....
S:: bablu utha h na abhi...( Hath pakdte hue request karte hue)
R:: light bnd h nhi dikhega....( Blouse kholte hue)
Fir sunita ne bhi kuch nhi kha...wo to ab aage badh hi chuki thi...or ab pura hi ravi ka ho jana chati thi....
Jaise aaj ravi kar raha tha...usko pata tak nhi tha...
Shankar to jaldi se uske upeer chadta ..thodi der uski jawani ko raundata fir itr jata ...kabhi kabhi to blouse bhi nhi khulta tha...bas sunita bhi chaddi per tak phuchti thi.....
Thodi der baad ravi ne sunita ka red or black mis colour Ka blouse khol diya ..
Sunita bas bablu ko dekh rahi thi ..blouse khilte hi ravi ne bra ke upper se uska right mamma daba diya...jisko thodi der pehle usne blouse ke bhar se chusa tha...
Sunita ne honth katte hue apni siski daba li ...
upload a pic
Fir ravi ne der na karte hue bra ke ander hath dala or sunita ka mota brown nilloe daba diya jiise ek dudh ek dhar nikal gayi....or dudh bra ko pura bhiga diya...
Sunita ko dard hua or boli......
S::: aaaaanhhhhaaaaa...siiii unnnhhh..aaannhaa.( dard bhari nazar se ravi ko dekhi)
lekin ravi to uske chuche ko chusne ko jhuka hua tha....
Or agle pal ravi ne usko bra upper ki or
uska dudh pine or niple ko chusne laga..bethe bethe....
Sunita ki halat kharab thi bas sir ko idhar udhar karne m lagi thi...
Kabi dono hath se Chadar pakdti kabhi ravi ka sir....
Ravi ab bari bari se uska dudh pine m laga tha....
Tabhi movie khtam ho gyi....
Dono ko dhyan hi nhi aaya...
Or jaise hi bablu palta
Sunita ne ravi ko hatha diya...ravi adha leta adha betha asi postion m sunita ke bagal m aagya...
Sunita ne khali sari se apne mameri dhak liye or boli ...
Or tez tez saans lene lagi.
S::: aaaa b..so...jaa betaaa...( Ramse sans control bkarte hue boli...)
B:: mummy Sus s aa rahi h....chalo na.....
Tabhi Ravi bola ..chal m aata hu...
Or sunita ko bola ...
R:: Apke kitchen ka darwaza khol do...m wahi se aaunga ,apna room ander se lock karke ......bablu ko bhar le jata hu....( Dhere se sunita ke kaan ke pass)
Sunita kuch nhi boli. Bas bra niche ki...or blouse ke 2 button laga diye ..
Ravi bhar ko gya.bablu ko le kar or sunita kitchen ko darawaz kholne...
Or darwaza khol ke bed m aa gayi...or golu ko rajai odha di...or bed ke bich m sula diya....
Tabhi bablu aa gya..to usse boli ...
S:: beta tu Dewar ke side so ja .raat ko bhaiya rota h na dudh pilaungi...kal tere sath soungi thik h....( Pyar se boli...)
tv abhi bhi chal raha tha...jo rajai usne golu ko odhai wo hi usne bablu ko bhi odha di ..
Or Apne liye..ya ye kaho ravi or apne liye ek mota kambal le liya...or tv band kar di...karib 2 min baad usko ravi ke room ki band hone ki awaz aayi...or fir kitchen ke door khulne ki....
Ravi uske room m aa gya thodi der m bina awaz kiye ...
Abhi room m sab Ase soye the...
Bablu diwar ke side...bich m golu ...fir sunita....
Ravi bed m beth gya ..or sunita ne ek baar bablu ki or dekha fir halke se aram se bina awaz kiye flour ke side sark gayi...or ravi uske bagal m let gya.....
To be continued....
or sath m kamar pe jo hath the ..unko hips m le ja ke hipps ke upper ke hisse matlb ki kamar se thoda niche le ja ke dabane laga payar se....
Ab aage::::
Sunita ke sharir m masti ki lehar daud gayi...wo ek haath se ravi ke baal sehlate to dusre hath se bed ki chadar or adh khuli aankho se tv or bablu ko dekhti....
Or dhire dhire masti m awaz nikal rahi thi...
Sunita Ka to abhi se ye haal tha...abhi main chizz to bachi hi hui thi...jha tak abhi ravi gaya hi nhi tha...
Fir ravi thoda upper ho ke sunita ke bagal me betha or sunita ka blouse ka button kholne laga.
To sunita dhire se boli ....
S:: bablu utha h na abhi...( Hath pakdte hue request karte hue)
R:: light bnd h nhi dikhega....( Blouse kholte hue)
Fir sunita ne bhi kuch nhi kha...wo to ab aage badh hi chuki thi...or ab pura hi ravi ka ho jana chati thi....
Jaise aaj ravi kar raha tha...usko pata tak nhi tha...
Shankar to jaldi se uske upeer chadta ..thodi der uski jawani ko raundata fir itr jata ...kabhi kabhi to blouse bhi nhi khulta tha...bas sunita bhi chaddi per tak phuchti thi.....
Thodi der baad ravi ne sunita ka red or black mis colour Ka blouse khol diya ..
Sunita bas bablu ko dekh rahi thi ..blouse khilte hi ravi ne bra ke upper se uska right mamma daba diya...jisko thodi der pehle usne blouse ke bhar se chusa tha...
Sunita ne honth katte hue apni siski daba li ...
upload a pic
Fir ravi ne der na karte hue bra ke ander hath dala or sunita ka mota brown nilloe daba diya jiise ek dudh ek dhar nikal gayi....or dudh bra ko pura bhiga diya...
Sunita ko dard hua or boli......
S::: aaaaanhhhhaaaaa...siiii unnnhhh..aaannhaa.( dard bhari nazar se ravi ko dekhi)
lekin ravi to uske chuche ko chusne ko jhuka hua tha....
Or agle pal ravi ne usko bra upper ki or
uska dudh pine or niple ko chusne laga..bethe bethe....
Sunita ki halat kharab thi bas sir ko idhar udhar karne m lagi thi...
Kabi dono hath se Chadar pakdti kabhi ravi ka sir....
Ravi ab bari bari se uska dudh pine m laga tha....
Tabhi movie khtam ho gyi....
Dono ko dhyan hi nhi aaya...
Or jaise hi bablu palta
Sunita ne ravi ko hatha diya...ravi adha leta adha betha asi postion m sunita ke bagal m aagya...
Sunita ne khali sari se apne mameri dhak liye or boli ...
Or tez tez saans lene lagi.
S::: aaaa b..so...jaa betaaa...( Ramse sans control bkarte hue boli...)
B:: mummy Sus s aa rahi h....chalo na.....
Tabhi Ravi bola ..chal m aata hu...
Or sunita ko bola ...
R:: Apke kitchen ka darwaza khol do...m wahi se aaunga ,apna room ander se lock karke ......bablu ko bhar le jata hu....( Dhere se sunita ke kaan ke pass)
Sunita kuch nhi boli. Bas bra niche ki...or blouse ke 2 button laga diye ..
Ravi bhar ko gya.bablu ko le kar or sunita kitchen ko darawaz kholne...
Or darwaza khol ke bed m aa gayi...or golu ko rajai odha di...or bed ke bich m sula diya....
Tabhi bablu aa gya..to usse boli ...
S:: beta tu Dewar ke side so ja .raat ko bhaiya rota h na dudh pilaungi...kal tere sath soungi thik h....( Pyar se boli...)
tv abhi bhi chal raha tha...jo rajai usne golu ko odhai wo hi usne bablu ko bhi odha di ..
Or Apne liye..ya ye kaho ravi or apne liye ek mota kambal le liya...or tv band kar di...karib 2 min baad usko ravi ke room ki band hone ki awaz aayi...or fir kitchen ke door khulne ki....
Ravi uske room m aa gya thodi der m bina awaz kiye ...
Abhi room m sab Ase soye the...
Bablu diwar ke side...bich m golu ...fir sunita....
Ravi bed m beth gya ..or sunita ne ek baar bablu ki or dekha fir halke se aram se bina awaz kiye flour ke side sark gayi...or ravi uske bagal m let gya.....
To be continued....
- 2,080
- 21,058
- 144
Nhi ye sab mere sapne m aata h or likh dete hu...bhai tum kamal karte ho... you can display a wonderful erotica.... honestly speaking... shuruat mein kuchh scenes ko samjhane ke liye tumhe alag se point out karna parta tha... lekin ab bas flow mein likhte jaa rahe ho... and you are getting damn good at it.... badhte update ke saath behatar hote jaa rahe ho....
chhoti details pe jo gaur kar ke likhna bhi reality se jor ke rakhta hain padhte hue... kuchh ghatna aisa lagta hain jaise khud ke saath ghati hui padh raha hoon... khaskar yeh tv wala kaand kayee baar ho chuka hain...
ek dum se pehli baar mein himmat na hoti hain... jaan ke bhi anjan bante hue saare kaam karte rahna unglio ka ulajhna sunita ka wo dar ke simatna aane waale pal ko soch ke... ajeeb sa maza purane yaade lauta dee hain bhai tumne...
love your writing...
- 2,080
- 21,058
- 144
Aaj koi soyega nhi..bhut update update karte ho...sab log uthe rahenge is shuagraat ko dekhne...