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Romance TANHAI KE SAHARE

fnd, this is my 1st story to bataiye mujhe kya imrovement karni he .and plz rate my writing


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sorbobhuk

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Good morning Bhai lag bhag aur 15 ke aas pass update honge.. Maine isiliye bada update bana raha hun 1000+ word wale... Thoda lamba khich raha hai par chah ke bhi word ko maine cut nahini kar paa raha hun.... Par maine kosis karunga kisi flashback seen jaldi khatam ho jaye par agar yunhi buildup ke baad khatam karne ka plan karu to story adhuri sir lagegi.... Nd I'm glad ki aapko story achi lagi.....
apne thik kaha bhai.....jitna update me flashback puri ho utna hi deso koi baat nhi......story ke sare plote clear hona chahiye....

Thanks
 

sorbobhuk

Well-Known Member
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Update No 10
.
.


Dipika – tu ab meri dimag kharab kar rhi he .
Swati- tu ek kaam kar vicky se na puch ek baar ..
Dipika- han thik he meri maa ab kaam kar laine thoda .
Swati-thik he chal
Ab aage

Tabhi lucy bhi saaman leke aajati he aur teno milke room sajana bhi suru kar dete haine . wanhi doosre aur vicky aur sooraj room maine jab ponhach te haine toh RB pehele se hi room ko sahi kar diya tha aur sab ka saaman bhi lagwa diya tha cupboard maine .par wo khud wanha pe na tha . sooraj toh aate hi bed pe let gay apar vicky RB ko dhoondne bahar chala gaya to usse pata chala ki wo chat pe he .

Vicky- bhai tu yanha pe kya kar raha he ?

Vicky- sun raha he tu –

RB- han kya hua bula raha tha

Vicky – aabe bula nahini chila raha tha . aur tu aaj ajeeb kyun behave kar raha he .

RB- aare kuch nahini . bas aise hi .

Vicky-thik he mat bata par aise to mat raha kar . ab nich chal jab tera dil kare bata dena .

Wo dono niche aajate haine . tab niche pata chalta he kuch reasons ke chalte fresher’s party 7 din baad hogi . uss se pehele jo jo participate karna chahate haine wo registration kara le. Rules and regulation usi time batayenge .

Bas aise hi din bit jaate haine class aur jaan pehchanmaine kyun ki college just suru hue the to classes bhi dhang ke nahini lage the . Aaj rat ko fresher’s party he toh sab lag gaye the apne aap ko ready karne ko . pure auditorium maine kacha kach bhid thi . anchor ne aake announce kiya aur formal greeting ke baad usne bataya ladkiyan apne detial bahar board maine jama karenge jo jo participate karenge aur unka selection by direct voting selection hoga aur qualifier ke liye top 3 jayenge jiinhe sab se jada votes milenge aur ladkon ka alag competition hoga jinmaine se 7 qualify honge jinmaine se quiz maine se 1 , song se 2 , dance se 2 aur ramp walk se 1 aur pushup completion se 1 select honge .(sala ladkon se majdoori karwa rahe haine aur ladkyan bas bethe bethe chehera dikha ke selection ho jayengi).

Sare compition hone ke baad kuch alag se program tha jaise seniors kuch boring speech (bilkool mere writing jaisi) thi .


Anchor- so, guys ab hamare pass sare mr. fresher qualifier round winners ke naam aa gaye haine jo ki he

Song – vicky ,jatin

Dance –sunil , manoj

Push up- dibesh

Quiz- RB

Ramp walk – sooraj

Aur ms fresher ke qualifier haine Barsha ,Nisha,Swati .so iss roundmain ekoi direct compition nahini hoga ye thoda filmy style maine hoga all thanks to our mr great sumit sir (student union leader ) jo lagta he aaj kal kuch jada hi movie dekhne lage haine .toh aisa he aap sab o ek form milega jin maine 50 question honge aap ke hobby se leke aapke vision sab kuch jin dono ka maximum question same honge unko titel milega . yaar sumit mujhe ab bhi ye idea bohat bakwaas lag rah he plz purana wala hi continue kar te haine …

Sumit- aare pamkhudi kyun tension le rahi he chal mainebol diya he to dekh thik hi hoga ..

Toh program suru hota he .ar sab ne form fill up karne lag jaate haine .sibyae vicky ke wo beth ke sab ko dekh rah tha .aise hi ye bhi khatam hogaya .ab result diclare 1 hour baad hona tha tab tak koi singer aaye the mumbai se wo gaane wale the .

Bahar sab gather ho gaye full group .

RB- suno tum log betho maine aata hun abhi .

Vicky – be tujhe kya hua ab tu kanah jaa raha he .

RB- aare kuch na hua abhi aa raha hun .

Dipika – vicky tum ne kuch bhara kyun nahini form maine .

Vicky – jaroorat hi nathi mujhe . ab agr maine jeet bhi jaat to fayeda kya hota .

Sooraj –aabe tujhe ek extraa kidney free milta .ham kya faide ke liye part liye be .tu to sala audience maien bethe ladkiyon ko dekh raha tha .

Vicky- kyun bhai ,maarne maine tula he .

Dipika- sachmaine tum ye kar rahe the .

Vicky- aare maine kyun aisa karunga .ye sala jalta he mujhse .

Dipik a- its ok , tum sab wait karo maine kuch snack leke aati hun

Vicky- aabe saale pad gaya chain tujhe . ruk maine jata hun iske piche ..

(aur wo bhi uske piche chala jaat ahe )

Sooraj- sala pata tha mujhe , ab jab donoek doosre ko like karte ho to phir faltu ki ***** kyun laga rakhe haine .

Swati- kya karein , ab sare ladke itne bewkoof ho rahe hain iss maine kya hamri kasoor he .

Sooraj- matlab

Swati- aare ladkyan kyun kahenge ki wo like karti he ladkon ko pehle propose karna hota he na …

Sooraj- han baad maine tum log ye keh sako ki tum hamare piche aaye the na ki ham gaye the . wah wah pehele se hi excuse apne passs rakh ti ho .

Tabhi RB bhi wanha aa jata he .

RB- ye vicky kanha gaya?

Sooraj- gaya he apne hone wali gf ko manane .


Tabhi sab ko andar bula lete haine kyun ki singers ki program khatam hone wali thi .

Vicky- kya hua yaar gussa kyun ho .

Dipika- maine kanha gussa hun .maine toh snack lene aayi hun

Vicky- aare wo sooraj majak kar raha tha

Dipika- majak, toh phirtumne part kyun na liya ,

Vicky-aare kuch reason the .

Dipika – sach sach batao na ladkyon ko ghur rahe the .

Vicky – aare tum samjhti kyun nahini ho maine kisiko nahini dekh raha tha .

Dipika – toh phir,

Vicky – maine jeet bhi jata to kya karta tum toh nahini thi na.

Dipika- matlab.

Vicky – kuch nahini.

Dipika -plz bato na .

Vicky – maine chahata tha ki tum bhi qualify ho aur tum aur maine ms& mr fresher bane .ab jab tum hi qalify nahini hui toh maine kya karta part leke .

Dipika- matlab tumne mere liye part nahini liya

Vicky- han

Dipika- han toh ab iske liye tum mujhe blame kar rahe ho .. maine kya tum se kaha tha aisa karne ko .

Vicky – aare meri maa, bhagwaan ne upar ka floor khali diya he kya .. maine tumse pyar karta hun iss liye part nahini liya aur tumhe lag rah he maine tumhe blame kar rah hun ..

Dipika- ye kya baat hui maien tumse kab kaha ki maine tumhe blame ….. wait a minute kya kaha tumne pyaar ..

Vicky – aare tabse yehi toh keh raha hun ki maine tumse pyar karta hun I love you ..

Dipika- thank you thank you thankyou .

Vicky – aaare wo gawar maine tumhe I love you bol raha hun birthday wish nahinikar rah hun jo thank you keh rahe ho .

Dipika- maine tumhe nahini bhagwan ko keh rahi hun ..

Vicky – aur mere liya kya ans he .

Dipika- tumhare liye ,,, tunhe to ans baad maine milega .

Vicky – ye kya baat hui , haan ya naa maine jawab dena he ismaine baad ka kya kehna he .

Dipika-aare bol diya na bas baad maine matlab baad maine ,abhi chalo andar .

Vicky- chalo chalte haine .

majha aageya hai padke. ..... deepika time kyu manga bhai......lagta hai wih RB se baat karna chahta hai...or sayed swaty ne sooraj ko pasand karti hai....waiting for next update
 
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sorbobhuk

Well-Known Member
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Update No 10
.
.


Dipika – tu ab meri dimag kharab kar rhi he .
Swati- tu ek kaam kar vicky se na puch ek baar ..
Dipika- han thik he meri maa ab kaam kar laine thoda .
Swati-thik he chal
Ab aage

Tabhi lucy bhi saaman leke aajati he aur teno milke room sajana bhi suru kar dete haine . wanhi doosre aur vicky aur sooraj room maine jab ponhach te haine toh RB pehele se hi room ko sahi kar diya tha aur sab ka saaman bhi lagwa diya tha cupboard maine .par wo khud wanha pe na tha . sooraj toh aate hi bed pe let gay apar vicky RB ko dhoondne bahar chala gaya to usse pata chala ki wo chat pe he .

Vicky- bhai tu yanha pe kya kar raha he ?

Vicky- sun raha he tu –

RB- han kya hua bula raha tha

Vicky – aabe bula nahini chila raha tha . aur tu aaj ajeeb kyun behave kar raha he .

RB- aare kuch nahini . bas aise hi .

Vicky-thik he mat bata par aise to mat raha kar . ab nich chal jab tera dil kare bata dena .

Wo dono niche aajate haine . tab niche pata chalta he kuch reasons ke chalte fresher’s party 7 din baad hogi . uss se pehele jo jo participate karna chahate haine wo registration kara le. Rules and regulation usi time batayenge .

Bas aise hi din bit jaate haine class aur jaan pehchanmaine kyun ki college just suru hue the to classes bhi dhang ke nahini lage the . Aaj rat ko fresher’s party he toh sab lag gaye the apne aap ko ready karne ko . pure auditorium maine kacha kach bhid thi . anchor ne aake announce kiya aur formal greeting ke baad usne bataya ladkiyan apne detial bahar board maine jama karenge jo jo participate karenge aur unka selection by direct voting selection hoga aur qualifier ke liye top 3 jayenge jiinhe sab se jada votes milenge aur ladkon ka alag competition hoga jinmaine se 7 qualify honge jinmaine se quiz maine se 1 , song se 2 , dance se 2 aur ramp walk se 1 aur pushup completion se 1 select honge .(sala ladkon se majdoori karwa rahe haine aur ladkyan bas bethe bethe chehera dikha ke selection ho jayengi).

Sare compition hone ke baad kuch alag se program tha jaise seniors kuch boring speech (bilkool mere writing jaisi) thi .


Anchor- so, guys ab hamare pass sare mr. fresher qualifier round winners ke naam aa gaye haine jo ki he

Song – vicky ,jatin

Dance –sunil , manoj

Push up- dibesh

Quiz- RB

Ramp walk – sooraj

Aur ms fresher ke qualifier haine Barsha ,Nisha,Swati .so iss roundmain ekoi direct compition nahini hoga ye thoda filmy style maine hoga all thanks to our mr great sumit sir (student union leader ) jo lagta he aaj kal kuch jada hi movie dekhne lage haine .toh aisa he aap sab o ek form milega jin maine 50 question honge aap ke hobby se leke aapke vision sab kuch jin dono ka maximum question same honge unko titel milega . yaar sumit mujhe ab bhi ye idea bohat bakwaas lag rah he plz purana wala hi continue kar te haine …

Sumit- aare pamkhudi kyun tension le rahi he chal mainebol diya he to dekh thik hi hoga ..

Toh program suru hota he .ar sab ne form fill up karne lag jaate haine .sibyae vicky ke wo beth ke sab ko dekh rah tha .aise hi ye bhi khatam hogaya .ab result diclare 1 hour baad hona tha tab tak koi singer aaye the mumbai se wo gaane wale the .

Bahar sab gather ho gaye full group .

RB- suno tum log betho maine aata hun abhi .

Vicky – be tujhe kya hua ab tu kanah jaa raha he .

RB- aare kuch na hua abhi aa raha hun .

Dipika – vicky tum ne kuch bhara kyun nahini form maine .

Vicky – jaroorat hi nathi mujhe . ab agr maine jeet bhi jaat to fayeda kya hota .

Sooraj –aabe tujhe ek extraa kidney free milta .ham kya faide ke liye part liye be .tu to sala audience maien bethe ladkiyon ko dekh raha tha .

Vicky- kyun bhai ,maarne maine tula he .

Dipika- sachmaine tum ye kar rahe the .

Vicky- aare maine kyun aisa karunga .ye sala jalta he mujhse .

Dipik a- its ok , tum sab wait karo maine kuch snack leke aati hun

Vicky- aabe saale pad gaya chain tujhe . ruk maine jata hun iske piche ..

(aur wo bhi uske piche chala jaat ahe )

Sooraj- sala pata tha mujhe , ab jab donoek doosre ko like karte ho to phir faltu ki ***** kyun laga rakhe haine .

Swati- kya karein , ab sare ladke itne bewkoof ho rahe hain iss maine kya hamri kasoor he .

Sooraj- matlab

Swati- aare ladkyan kyun kahenge ki wo like karti he ladkon ko pehle propose karna hota he na …

Sooraj- han baad maine tum log ye keh sako ki tum hamare piche aaye the na ki ham gaye the . wah wah pehele se hi excuse apne passs rakh ti ho .

Tabhi RB bhi wanha aa jata he .

RB- ye vicky kanha gaya?

Sooraj- gaya he apne hone wali gf ko manane .


Tabhi sab ko andar bula lete haine kyun ki singers ki program khatam hone wali thi .

Vicky- kya hua yaar gussa kyun ho .

Dipika- maine kanha gussa hun .maine toh snack lene aayi hun

Vicky- aare wo sooraj majak kar raha tha

Dipika- majak, toh phirtumne part kyun na liya ,

Vicky-aare kuch reason the .

Dipika – sach sach batao na ladkyon ko ghur rahe the .

Vicky – aare tum samjhti kyun nahini ho maine kisiko nahini dekh raha tha .

Dipika – toh phir,

Vicky – maine jeet bhi jata to kya karta tum toh nahini thi na.

Dipika- matlab.

Vicky – kuch nahini.

Dipika -plz bato na .

Vicky – maine chahata tha ki tum bhi qualify ho aur tum aur maine ms& mr fresher bane .ab jab tum hi qalify nahini hui toh maine kya karta part leke .

Dipika- matlab tumne mere liye part nahini liya

Vicky- han

Dipika- han toh ab iske liye tum mujhe blame kar rahe ho .. maine kya tum se kaha tha aisa karne ko .

Vicky – aare meri maa, bhagwaan ne upar ka floor khali diya he kya .. maine tumse pyar karta hun iss liye part nahini liya aur tumhe lag rah he maine tumhe blame kar rah hun ..

Dipika- ye kya baat hui maien tumse kab kaha ki maine tumhe blame ….. wait a minute kya kaha tumne pyaar ..

Vicky – aare tabse yehi toh keh raha hun ki maine tumse pyar karta hun I love you ..

Dipika- thank you thank you thankyou .

Vicky – aaare wo gawar maine tumhe I love you bol raha hun birthday wish nahinikar rah hun jo thank you keh rahe ho .

Dipika- maine tumhe nahini bhagwan ko keh rahi hun ..

Vicky – aur mere liya kya ans he .

Dipika- tumhare liye ,,, tunhe to ans baad maine milega .

Vicky – ye kya baat hui , haan ya naa maine jawab dena he ismaine baad ka kya kehna he .

Dipika-aare bol diya na bas baad maine matlab baad maine ,abhi chalo andar .

Vicky- chalo chalte haine .

majha aageya hai padke. ..... deepika time kyu manga bhai......lagta hai wih RB se baat karna chahta hai...or sayed swaty ne sooraj ko pasand karti hai....waiting for next update
 
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Rbcl.007

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bhai update kab dereho......waiting for next update[/QUOTEsorry bhai aaj thoda jada hi busy tha .abhi beth ke thoda likh raha hun agar ready ho gaya to abhi kuch der main ya subha tak daal doonga .
THANKS FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT .
 
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Rbcl.007

Active Member
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Kuchh bhi Nahi katna detail me story chahiye,
Sab characters bahut hi behtareen lag rahe hai.
OK BHAI . Maine try kar rah hun morning tak update de deneko . sorry aaj toda jada work load tha ..
THANKS FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT .
 

Rbcl.007

Active Member
591
1,425
123
Update No 11
.
.

Dipika- tumhare liye ,,, tunhe to ans baad maine milega .

Vicky – ye kya baat hui , haan ya naa maine jawab dena he ismaine baad ka kya kehna he .

Dipika-aare bol diya na bas baad maine matlab baad maine ,abhi chalo andar .


Vicky- chalo chalte haine .

Ab aage
Senior Guy-“hey tum RB ke dost hona ?”

Vicky-han sir kya hua

S.G- tum mere sath aao ek baar. ham RB ko ham dhoond rahe the par wo mil nahini rah hai...kuch kam tha uss se . filhaal toh tum hi aajao management room maine .

Wanhi doosre taraf

Anchor- so guys jo iss competion ko jeet rahe haine wo pair he swati aur sooraj inke lagbhag 89% match aaye haine ..

Swati aur sooraj stage pe jaate haien janha swati ko crown pehnaya jaat he .. aur unko unke gift hampers aur doosre prize item diya jaat he … aur thodi der dance aur baki proggramme hone ke baad sab wapis aa jate haine ..

At hostel

Swati- kya baat he aaj maine ms fresher bani hun par ronak kisi aur ke chehre maine dikh raha hai .

Lucy- han maine bhi yahi baat notice kar rahi hun

Dipika- kya mujhe bol rahe ho ?

Swati- aare wah aaj toh madam ko aas pass ka haal hi pat nahini chal rah he .bata na kya hua he

Dipika- Vicky proposed me .

Swati – really ,congrats aaj toh double party hogi …

Dipika- par maine han nahini kaha use.

Swati- kyaaa . tune use mana kar diya .aabe pagal hai kya ..tu khud uspe mar rahi thi aur aaj wo samne se proposed kiya toh tune mana kardiya .

Dipika – aare nare mana nahini kiya bas hold maine dala he ..

Swati- aur wo kyun bhala.

Dipika- aare usimaine toh maja he ..ab wo daily mere piche ans ke liye aayega …

Swati- aare wah meri yaar toh kafi chalak ho gayee.par bachhu ham toh party lenge chahe jo b hi ho jaye ..

Dipika- aare le lena pehele teri ms fresher hone ki de de meri wali kal le lena

Swati -nahini .. bahna mat bana .jab tu apni party degi tab hi maine dungi .kal fix he thik hai.

Dipika- ok .

Swati chalo maine fresh hoke aaati hun ..

Dipika-aare maine toh ye Vicky ko dena bhul gayee.

Lucy- kya bhul gayee .

Dipika- aare jab ham bahar aaye the auditorium maine se tab ek senior event management se aake batye ki RB ne apna naam final competition se withdraw kar diya toh bas usika form use lotane ko dhud rahe the mil nahin raha th awo toh Vicky ko de diya .wo mere pass hi reh gayee hai.

Lucy- ohh. Acha sun dikhana ek baar kya kya likha he ussne .

Dipika- kyun ..

Lucy- aare tere sir toh tere chakar maine kuch bhare hi nahini kass ye agar withdrwal nahini karta toh shayd iska match aajata kisi ke sath ..

Lucy- han yaar .

Dipika-ruk barsha ko phone karke poochte haine kya ans diya tha usne aur match karte haine ..

Swati- kya match karne ki baat ho rahi hai.

Dipika-aare RB apna form ………………………………………………………….. yeh hai puri baat aur ham barsha se iska match karke dekh rahe haine kitna match karta hai.

Swati-ohhh.toh phone lagana. Par sun usko iss bare maine kuch mat batan bas ans jaanke check karenge kitne % milte haine .

Lucy – aur tu apni bhi match kar lena thik he ..

Swati- ab ,meri kyun .

Dipika-aare kar lena .ya ispe bhi sooraj ko boora lag jayega kya

Swati- tu phir bolne lagi …

To wo barsha ko phone karte haine aur eke k match karne lag jaati haine . ans 11% aata he ..

Dipika-aare yaar ye toh 11% aa rahe haine..

Lucy- acha hua ki RB ne apna form withdraw kar liya barna match karne wale has has ke mar jaate .

Dipika- haan yaar to toh bada cartoon nikla be 50% bhi match nahi hua .

Lucy- are swati tera kitna match aaya .

Swati-15%

Dipika- chalo kam se 15 % to hua .

Lucy- muje lagta ye na iss duniya ka ek hi sample hai. Iska aadha ans dekh ke tohmaine khud hairan hun ..aisa shayad single pics he ye duniya maine ..

Dipika- aare kya hua swati.tu ky asoch rahi he ..

Swati .- kuchh nahini

Lucy –yaar tum baten karo mujhe nikalana he barsh ane aaj bulaya he apne mama ke ghar ..raat ko wanhi rookungi

Dipika- han han jaa barsha toh sirf bahana he asli maine uske cousin se milna he ..

Lucy- han toh kya hua tune toh apne liye dekh liya ab mujhe bhi toh dekhna hoga na ..chal bye good night

Dipika- han bye and have very good night with barsha”s cousin

Lucy- haye . teri munh maine ghee sakkar.

Dipika- aabe jaaa sajan ji wait kar rahe honge.

Lucy – hmm wo toh he .bye .

Swati& dipika – bye

Dipika- chal ab bata kya hua hai.

Swati – kya hua mujhe

Dipika - itna khoyee hui he .aur bol rahi he ki kuch nahini

Swati- 95

Dipika- kya 95

Swati 95%

Dipika- aare bolegi bhi kya hua hai.

Swati- RB aur mera 95% match aarah hai

Dipika- kyaa, par tune to 15 % bola tha

Swati- wo maine lucy ke saamne ye nahini batana cha rahi thi

Dipika-Iskaa matlab sooraj ke jagha usko ban na tha mr fresher .

Swati- han

Dipika- chalo ye toh acha hua ki usne withdrawl kar diya barna sooraj kaise banta ..

Swati- han par uska mere se 95% match aarah he aur sooraj ka 89%

Dipika- toh kya hua .. tu ye stupid si game ki result ko serious le rahi hai.

Swati- phir bhi maine jaan ti hun par sooraj ka jada aana tha na mere sath iske sath kyun aay ..

Dipika- aare chhod na kyun uss cartoon ke chakar maine dimag kharap kar rahi he aaj itne din hogaye class start hue aur admission ko mujhe toh ab tak uska shakal dhang se yaad nahini he .

Swati- par usne form withdrawl kyun kiya fir .

Dipika- mujhe kyun pata .maine konsa use baat karti hun

Swati- to tu Vicky se puch na .

Dipika- aare tu pagal he kya . tu seriously ye soch rahi he kya teri aur uski…

Swati- aare meri maa maine pani nahini teri soch rahi hun

Dipika – meri?

Swati – mujhe lagta he won a tereko like karta he isiliye usne jab tera selection nahini hua toh wo bhi withdrawl kar diya ..

Dipika- aare kuch bhi .wo kyun mujh ko like karega

Swati- toh Vicky ne bhi kya kiya wo bhi same kaam kiya na ,bas ek likh ke form withdraw kiya ussne kuch likha hi nahini.

Dipika- be ab tu mujhe confuse kar rahi he wo vikcy ka friend he to aisa gar kuch karega Vicky ko pat toh hoga .

Swati – aare mental wo tujhe agar like kar rah he toh kya wo Vicky ko batayega iss baremaine .kyun ki use bhi pata hoga na ki Vicky tujh se like karta hai.

Dipika- aare ,,… rook maine Vicky se baat karti hun .
.

continued----
Sorry Bhai Log Ye Wala Update Jald Baji Maine Likha Hai Wo Bhi Bohat Late Night Maine To Kuch Idhar Hua Ho To Maaf Karna .

 
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