★☆★ Xforum | Ultimate Story Contest 2020 ~ Reviews Thread ★☆★

[Dolaand Trump]

Story:- हीरो


Writer:- Dolaand Trump


Review:- Aman Sach me ek hero tha Hero sirf wo nahi hota jo Gundo ko peet de aur hero ban jaye hero dil se banta hai Aur Aman me ye khoobi thi us ke paas Ek bara dil tha Jahan insaan kisi aam situation me kisi ki help nahi marta wanhi Aman ne ek aisi situation jis me us ko pata tha ke us ki jaan ko bhi khatra ho sakta hai us situation me wo help karne ke liye gaya lekin bare dil ke saath Aman ke paas ek aur cheez thi wo tha dimagh jis ke chalte Aman ne apni security bhi rakhi Signal na ata daikh Aman khud us ko Hospital le ker gaya aur pura kharch bhi de ker wapis aya Ek baar phir Aman ne khud ko hero sabit karte huwe dikhaya Jab us ko pata chala ke Doctor Ek dawa bana raha hai jis se insaniyat ka bhala ho ga to Aman ne Doctor ko na sirf chupne ki jagha di balke us ko ek underground lab bhi bana ker di Lekin iss ki bhanak dushmano ko lag gayi jis ke chalte us ne Aman aur Doctor ko pakarne ke liye Gunde bhej diye Wahan bhi Aman ne Apne dimagh ka istimal kia aur bari chalaki se Doctor aur dawa ko le ker nikal gaya lekin gundo ne unhe daikh lia Aman ne phir se dimagh ka istimal kia aur Apna balidan dete huwe dawa ko khud per istimal kia aur baki dawa jala ker Doctor ko wahan se bhej diya kiu ke agar Doctor un ke haath lag jata to Wo Doctor se galat kaam karwa sakte the jis ke chalte Doctor ne khudkhusi ker li Aur Us dawa ke experiment ko apne saath he khatam ker diya dawa ke istimal se aman ne Ashok jaise galat insaan ko us ke karmo ki saza de di Iss kahani se hume ye seekh milti hai hero banne ke liye Taqatwar hona ya kisi superpower ki Zarorat nahi hai Bus ek Khubsoorat dil hona chahiye Mujhe ap ki kahani pasand ayi best of luck for contest

Iss Kahani ko parhne, pasand karne, review likhne aur iss kahani k hero ko pasand karne ke liye apka bahut bahut shukriya.

 

[Dolaand Trump]

Story:- खोया हुआ प्यार



Writer:- Dolaand Trump


Review:- Ye story Sneha Aur rohan ke pyar ki hai jo rishte me cousins the lekin Rohan Sneha ko cousin se zada dost se zada apna pyar manta tha pehle to sneha ka Amit ke pyar ki wajha se Rohan us se dur hi gya lekin Dobara jab us ko moka mila to us ne us moke ka faida uthaya Aur sneha ke saamne shadi ka proposal rakha Sneha Rohan ke pyar ko Samajh gayi Ke us ka pyar Amit jaisa nahi hai jo mosam ki tarha badal jaye Rohan ka pyar sacha tha chahat sachi thi jis wajha se us ko us ka pyar mil gaya aur sneha ne han ker di Ek achi storie thi lekin iss ko aur acha banaya ja sakta hai otherwise good story Best of luck for contest

Thanks for beautiful review

 

[Champ_AK_81]

Story:- Karma

Writer:- Damha

Pehle to aapka shukriya ki mental health ke upar aapne story likha...Bahut kam hi iss topic ke stories padha hai maine...As a medical student jitne bhi mental health issue wale patients se mila hun...Patients ki haalaath kuch aisa hi dekha hai.

Bahut hi vulnerable hote hai wo...Unke aas paas ke chhote incidents bhi unke health mein bahut impact daal sakta hai...Bahut care ke saath unka parwarish karna padta hai...Unhe bhi aam log jaise hi behave kar ke...Confidence de kar...Aur jitna hi sake utna socialize kar ke...Tabhi wo apne jindagi khushi se jee bhi sakte hai aur behavior mein kaafi jaldi improve kar sakte hai.

Issi ke saath hi hote hai humaare hi aas paas ke so called perfect log jo unhe paagal paagal keh ke chidhaate hai aur unko demoralize karte hai...Aur aaj kal ke busy duniya mein jyadatar parents ke paas bhi utna time nahi hota ki har pal unka khayal rakh sake...Aise mein health impact negative pad jaata hai.

Inn sab ke baawjud unka baaki logo se ghul milne ki koshish aur thik hone ka jazbaa bahut hi inspiring hota hai.

Abb aate hai story par.

Aapke story mein Anam ka acche se khayal rakhne ke liye uska bhai Ayaan aur Khala thhe...Aur kuch hadd tak Sheraz.

Aapka story mein sabse accha ye laga ki aapne story ke shuruaat se le kar ant tak flow ko maintain kiya...Usse story thoda long hone ke baawjud bhi boring nahi laga...Kuch suspense thhe aur thrill.

Suspense thoda padhne ke baad guess ho gaya ki Sheraz hi kuch aisa karega...Title aur character se guess kar liya .

Anam ki character ko bhaur acche se dikhaya...Uska maasumiyat...Uska bhi aam logo jaise jeevan jeene ki wo koshish...Bahut accha laga padh kar.

Aur jaise jaise story aage badhta gaya Ayaan ki gair maujudgi hint de raha tha ki shayad Anam ke saath kuch bura hone wala hai...Aur ek point mein aa kar aisa ho bhi gaya.

Yaha par bhi Khala ki wo baat...Dupatta pehen kar rakhna...Kuch aise hi chhoi baatein bhi Anam par gehra asar kar gaya tha.

Uss vakt aapne Ayaan aur Khala ke emotions ko kaafi acche se dikhaya.

Abb aate hai Sheraz par...Villain...Chaahe usse kitna bhi pachtawa kyu na ho lekin uski iss gunaah ka koi maafi nahi hai...Aur aakhir tak usse kabhi maafi nahi mila.

Sahi hai...Kisi ke saath bura karne wale logon ko kabhi chain nahi milta chaahe wo kisi bhi mukaam tak kyu naa pahunch jaaye.

Aur story ka ending mein aisa laga jaise Anam waapas aa gayi hai Romaisa ke roop mein.

Pure story mein chhoti chhoti baaton ka acche se khayal rakha aapne jo ki bahut mushkil hota hai long story mein.

Story mein jyada kami to najar nahi aaya lekin agar story ka starting mein Anam par aur thoda focus rehta to shyad aur accha rehta.

Overall, story padh kar bahut accha laga.

All the best for contest.

 

[Damha]

Story:- भूख


Writer:- PARADOX


Review:- Paisa taqat Aur hawas ke nashe me chur logo per likhi gayi kahani aj aise insaano ki wajha se he beti ko paida hote he maar dia jata hai “Ek insaan ki biwi Pregnant thi aur bache ko janm dene wali thi jab us ke dost ne use mubarakbad di to us inaan ne kaha dua karna beti paida na ho ye sun ker dost thora gusse me aa gaya aur bola tujhe beti kiu nahi chahiye masla kya hai tujhe to us insaan ne aisi baat kahi ke jise sun ke dost heran ho gya us insaan ne kaha Beti se koi masla nahi hai us ke naseeb se darta hi” ye thi ek baap ke dil ka haal jo sirf beti iss liye nahi chahta tha ke wo duniya ke darindo se darta tha Kuch log chup ker darindgi karte hai to kuch khule aam karte thr kuch iss per he likhi gayi thi kahani ek baap jis ne lala ke dar se hamesha apni beti ko ghar me kaid rakha us ke dar se apni beti ki chup ker shaid karwa di us bechari ko abhi thori he khusiya naseeb huwi thi ke un darindo se wo bhi nahi daikhi gayi itne saalo baad sirf apne baap se milne ki chah me wapis ayi us bechari ko noch ker kha liya un darindo ne us masoom bache per bhi reham nahi kia unho ne Bohat bhavuk kahani thi narration aur flow acha tha Best of luck for contest

 

[Damha]

Story:- निकिता ...... डर का एहसास


Writer:- Niharika


Review:- Kahani 2 janmo ke beech chalti hai Jis me ek dusht raja Anjlika aur rani nikita ke upar hai Anjlika ne na sirf pichle janm me nikita ki jaan bachayi balke us ne jaan bachate huwe apni jaan gawa bhi di aur ek shaheed ki maut mari lekin agle janm me bhi anjlika ne apna kartawya khoob nibhaya Aur Na sirf us ne nikita ko alert kia balke har qadam us ke saath rahi Akhir me burai per achai ki jeet huwi raja ko us ke karmo ki saza mili Good story bus Narration thori weak thi But good story Best of luck for contest

 

[Damha]

TITLE :- Karma (Whatever you do it will be come back to you)

writer - Damha

wow, bhut hi bdiya story hai yaar,osm ??
Contest ki behtreen stories me se ek

Maine is story ko pehle pada nahi, lekin ye meri Galti thi ?

Bhout hi lazwaab story thi bhai damha, jitni tarif ki jaye utni kam

Karma title ko chritarth karti hui kahani, anam akhir romaisa ke roop me hi sheraz ka kaal bani

ye story winner list me jarur ayegi

Meri taraf se story ko 10 me se 10 no.

best of luck bhai for the contest

Thanks you soo much for this beautiful review And for wishes

 

[Damha]

What a great great very nice story

Is story ko read kr k ek nashiyat ho gai h
Jesi kerni wesi bharni ,,,,,
Hm jitne bhi gunha kr lain,,ek din yahi isi life Dunia mai samne ate hain

Or jo Marne k bad aamal milain gy wo alag se

Such a very beautiful story
I slute u ,,,is mai ek sabaq h sekhne walo kliye

Thank you soo much Asif khan For a beautiful review ap ne meri story ko samjha us ke liye dil se shukriya

 

[Damha]

TITLE :- Karma (Whatever you do it will be come back to you)

writer - Damha

Damha bhai aapne bahut hi acchi story likhi hai.


Title bhi jo aapne di hai iss story ko wo bahut achhi hai.

Par ek shikayat bhi hai aapne Sahraz ki patni se milwane ka bol Ayaan ko Sahraz ke ghar bheja tha par wo to thi hi nahi.

Aur Ending mein jo aapne likha tha Anam ki awajein Sahraz ko sunayi dena aur uska thik waise hi marna ye bahut accha laga mujhe.

At last Story was fantastic

Thank you soo much Ristrcted for this beautiful review Ap ne jo sawal kia us ka jwab ye hai sheraz ne ayan se kaha tha tujhe apni family se milwana hai Aur ap me agar us ke last conversation theek se parhi ho to ap ko pata chale ga us ki biwi use chor gayi hai han ye ho sakta tha ke main us ki biwi ke scene bhi add ker deta lekin phir storie bohat zada lambi ho jani thi aur word limit itni thi nahi

 

[Damha]

Story:- Karma (Whatever you do it will be come back to you)

writer - Damha

Wow. What a story. Have read only few contest story and in that one of the best one.

Koi galat nhi hota hai. Par situation bna deta hai galat usse. Sheraj ke saath bhi yahi hu. Intention galat nhi tha par jab shaintan hawii hota hai toh koi kuch nhi kar pata hai.

What u wanted to convey in the story, u did in the perfect way- Karma is unforgiving and always gets payback.


Best of luck for competition.

Thank you soo much Imyours bhayia ji for your beautiful review ap ne storie ko samjha ye jaan ker mujhe bohat khusi huwi

 

[Damha]

TITLE Karma (Whatever you do it will be come back to you)


Writer Damha


Bhai sach me kamal ker dia ap ne Full emotions se bharpur story Main iss forum per zada visit to nahi karta lekin Ap mere favorite writer ho Mujhe khusi hai ke Ap ne itni Achi story hamare liye likhi


Story parte huwe aisa lag raha tha jaise sab kuch mere saamne ho raha ho Har cheez ko ap ne bohat details se likha hai Ayaan ka Anam ke liye pyar daikh ker Bohat Acha lag raha tha


Sab se emotional scene Anam ke rape wala tha Wo parte huwe mera dil chah raha tha Ke kisi tarha khud sheraz ko mar du


Sach kaha hai kisi ne jab insaan ke andar shetaan ata hai to wo apna Control khud per se kho deta hai Aisa he kuch sheraz ke saath bhi huwa


Lekin ap ne Title ki pure tarike se sabit karte huwe Sheraz ko us ke karmo ki saza di Ayaan ko Anam Romaisa ke roop me wapis mil gayi ye bohat acha huwa



best scene wo tha jis Me Anam khud Sheraz ki rooh ko lene ati hai tab ja ker laga ke sheraz ko us ke karmo ki sahi saza mili hai


Main ne iss contest ki baki stories nahi parhi Main ap ki story ka intezar ker raha tha Aur mera intezar waste nahi gaya Mujhe ek bohat achi story parne ko mili hai Ab ap ki 2nd story ka wait hai please 2nd story bhi zaroor post karna 15 june se pehle

Thank you soo much Awara bhayia ji for your precious review Ap ne storie ko itne dehan se parha aur itna acha review diya us ke liye shukriya