Romance Choti si Bhool by Jatin (completed)

[The Immortal]

Date : 22-03-09
7:00 pm
Abhi abhi dipti ka phone aaya tha. ushne kuch aisa bataaya hai ki ush ki baat shun kar dil dahal gaya hai aur aankhe nam ho gayin hain
“ arey ritu news dekh rahi ho ki nahi”
Maine pucha, “kyon kya baat hai” ?.
“Arey dekho to sahi tumhaara faridabad wala ghar live aa raha hai. tumhaare ghar ke peeche kavita ki laash mili hai. laash kankaal ban chuki hai. bahut hi khaufnaak nazaara hai” — dipti ne kaha
“ohh my god, kavita ki laash mere ghar ke peeche” —- maine kaha
“haan, ek baat aur shuno, manish ko sanjay ke clinic se ek pen drive mili hai. ush mein kavita ke ** ki puri video hai, vo video bhi manish ne media ko de di hai. ushe bhi dhundala karke deekhaaya ja raha. chaaro logo ke chehre saaf deekh rahe hain. Billu theek kah raha tha ritu, kavita ka bahut brutal ** huva tha”
“Kya ? ye tumhe kab pata chala” — maine pucha
“Pen drive to koyi ek hafte pehle mil gayi thi. manish ne mujhe bata bhi diya tha par aaj kavita ki laash mili hai”
“ohh god tum mujhe aaj bata rahi ho” —- maine kaha
mai bhaag kar apni khidki mein gayi aur baahar dekha
baahar billu ki taxi khadi thi par ush mein koyi nahi tha
“yaar mujhe laga tumhaara ish sab mein koyi interest nahi hai” dipti ne kaha
“aur vo jo sunita ne bataaya tha vo kya tha dipti” —- maine pucha.
“Vo jhut bol rahi thi ritu, dar-asal sunita ye afvaah sanjay ke kahne par uda rahi thi. maine to bataaya bhi tha tumhe ki manish ko khud ushki baat par yakin nahin hai” —- dipti ne kaha.
“Ohh god,….. dipti, maine billu ko na jaane kya-kya bol diya” — maine kaha
tab achaanak mujhe dhayaan aaya ki peechle 2 hafte se billu mujhe kahin nahi deekha. Na hi 2 hafte se ushki koyi chit ghar mein mili. Haan ushki taxi abhi bhi vahin ki vahin khadi hai.
maine dipti ka phone kaat diya
maine tv on kar ke dekha to sabhi channels par kavita ka kankaal deekhaaya ja raha tha. sach mein bahut khaufnaak najaara tha. news mein bataaya ja raha tha ki forensic report ke mutaabik kavita ko jeenda hi dafna diya gaya tha.
dipti ka phir se phone aa gaya
“manish ne media ko ish sab mein involve karke acha kiya na ritu. Ab mujrimo ko saja mil sakegi. Ab ye case media sambhaal legi. Manish bata raha tha ki sanjay ke saath saath baaki ke teen logo ko giraftaar kar liya gaya hai. par yaar media wale kavita ke bhai ke baare mein puch rahein hain. Kya billu abhi bhi vahin hai” —- dipti ne kaha
“mujhe nahi pata dipti, peechle 2 hafte se maine ushe nahi dekha. Haan ushki taxi yaha jaroor khadi hai” — maine kaha
mera dil bahut bhaari ho raha tha. main badi mushkil se dipti se baat kar paa rahi thi.
aakhri baar maine billu ko 8-03-09 ko dekha tha. ushki vo dard bhari halki si mushkaan aur aankho ki nami mujhe abhi tak yaad hai. ush din billu ke jaane ke baad sanjay bhi ushke peeche peeche gaya tha.
kahin sanjay ne to ushke saath kuch aisa vaisa nahi kar diya. vo kah to raha tha ki, “marna to ushe hai hi, yaha nahi to kahin aur marega”
tabhi mujhe yaad aaya ki maine ush din ushki chit apni diary mein rakhi thi.
maine vo chit nikaali aur ushe padhne lagi
ushmein leekha tha :——-
“ meri pyari ritu.
Tum maano ya na maano. Mai tumhe bahut pyar karta hun. mujhe khud bhi nahi pata ki aisa kyon hai. haan bas ek ahsaash hai ki tumhaare bina jee nahi sakta. tum meri jeendagi ho ritu. main bas tumhe paane ki ek koshish kar raha tha. kya karun apne dil ke haatho majboor tha. par main ye baat bhul raha tha ki tum mujhe kabhi maaf nahi kar paaogi. Karogi bhi kyon. ** meri didi ka huva tha,tumhaari ish mein kya galti thi. aur haan ritu maine pehle jaroor kahaani banaayi hai, bahut jhut boley hai. itne jhut boley hai ki aaj tumhaara vishwaas kho chuka hun. par maine apni didi ke ** ki kahaani nahi banaayi. Haan mere paas koyi saboot nahi hai. tabhi to bina saboot ke kuch kar nahi paaya. Aur didi ka ab tak kuch pata nahin ki kaha hai, jo aakar khud sach bata sakein. to tum kuch bhi soch sakti ho. Aaj lagta hai ki main haar gaya. Koshish bahut kar raha tha tumhe apna pyar deekhaane ki par….. chalo chhodo.. aur kuch nahi leekha ja raha. dil bhaari ho raha hai aur aankhe bhar aayi hai. vaise pata nahi tum padhogi bhi ya nahi. but I will love you forever. Kabhi meri yaad aaye to yahi mat sochna ki maine tumhe barbaad kiya tha. ho sake to ek baar ye bhi sochna ki maine tumhe pyar bhi kiya tha. main jhuta inshaan sahi par mera pyar sacha hai.…… billu”
Ye letter padhte padhte meri aankho se aanshu tapak rahe the aur letter ki leekhaavat ko dhundala kar rahe the.
Mujhe ye samajh nahi aa raha tha ki aakhir billu ke dil mein pyar ka phool kaise khil sakta hai. par jo bhi ho ushka pyar ab mujhe meri aatma tak mahsush ho raha hai.
Date : 29-03-09
Aaj ek hafta ho gaya kavita ki laash ko mile par billu ka kuch ata pata nahi. aisa kaise ho gaya ki vo apni sister ki laash tak dekhne nahin aaya.
Pura hafta meri najre billu ko dhundati rahi. roj subah office jaate vakt aur shaam ko office se aate vakt main billu ki taxi ko dekhti hun. vo 8-03-09 se vaisi ki vaisi ek hi jagah khadi hai.
Shaam ko ghar aate hi darvaaje ke aas paas dekhti hun ki kahin billu ne koyi chit to nahi chhodi par mujhe kuch nahi milta.
Ek baar vo apni didi ka antim shanskaar kar deta to acha hota. Mere man se ek bojh hat jaata. Aaj phir se bahut dukh ho raha hai ki maine bina soche samjhe ush din mandir ke baahar pata nahin billu ko ushki didi ke baare mein kya kya bol diya.
Aaj subah mandir jaate vakt meri aankhe billu ko dhund rahi thi. Pata nahin billu se kya rista ban gaya hai mera. Vo hota hai to main chaahti hun ki vo dafa ho jaaye. Vo nahi hota to kuch na kuch aisey haalaat ho jaate hai ki meri nazre bas ushe hi dhundati hain
Har pal yahi lagta hai ki abhi kahin se billu aayega aur kahega “ritu ruko tumse kuch jaroori baat karni hai”
Jab bhi apne ghar mein ghusti hun to man yahi sochta hai ki mujhe abhi ek chit milegi jish mein leekha hoga, “meri pyari ritu” aur main pura letter pyar se padhungi.
Par aisa kuch nahi ho raha. pata nahi billu kaha chala gaya.
Mandir se aate vakt maine ushki taxi mein jhaank kar dekha to mujhe ek diary aur gift pack deekha
Maine ek pathar uthaaya aur gaadi ka sheesa tod diya aur diary aur vo gift pack baahar nikaal liya.
Mai apne ghar ke ander aa gayi aur bedroom mein baith kar ushki diary padhne lagi.
Ushmein leekha tha :——-
Jabse hosh aaya hai mai bas ritu ke liye hi tadap raha hun. pata nahi kish janam ka rista hai mera ush se. jaroor koyi janmo ka rista hai varna ye pyar hona mushkil tha.
Mai to ritu ke jariye sanjay ko barbaad karne gaya tha par apna dil kho baitha. Acha hi huva. Jabse ritu se pyar huva hai, tab se ye ahsaash huva hai ki badla lene se kuch haansil nahi hota. Sanjay ko barbaad karne ke chakkar mein maine ritu jaisi ek achi inshaan ki jeendagi barbaad kar di. Mujhe kya mila ? kuch nahi. na meri didi ko insaaf mila, na meri didi ka kuch pata chala.
Ab ek koshish karta hun apne pyar ko paane ki. maine ritu ki aankho mein apne liye pyar dekha hai. mujhe ummeed hai ki main ek na ek din apne pyar ko paa lunga. Baaki ish kishmat ka kuch pata nahin. Main bas ek ummeed hi rakh sakta hun.

 

[The Immortal]

Date : 12-02-09
Aaj taxi ka intezaam ho gaya hai. kal se chalaana shuru kar dunga. Pata nahi kuch ban paaunga ya nahi par ek shuruvaat to kar hi di hai. mere aur ritu ke beech mein bahut saari rukaavte hai.
Sabse pehli rukaavat hai, ritu ke man mein mere liye nafrat. Ush nafrat ko dur karna hoga. Koshish kar raha hun. dekhte hain kya hota hai
sabse badi rukaavat hai mera status. Mere paas kuch nahi hai ritu ko dene ko. Mujhe bahut mehnat karni hogi. agar pati ka farz nibhaana hai to mujhe kuch ban-na padega. chalo taxi se start karta hun. jaldi hi mumbai mein paanv jamaane ke baad kuch bada kaam bhi karunga.
Date : 13-02-09
Aaj ritu ke ghar mein ek letter chhod diya hai. maine ushmein ritu ko leekh diya hai ki main ush se shaadi karna chaahta hun. dekhte hai vo ish baat ko kaise leti hai.
Soch raha hun IT field mein kuch seekh lun. Maine delhi mein ish baare mein dhyaan hi nahi diya. varna aaj IT field mein kaam kar raha hota. Computer ke basics to mujhe pata hai, bas high tech skill seekhne ki jaroorat hai. roj 1-2 ghanta nikaal kar ye kaam bhi kar sakta hun. vakt kam hai. mujhe jald se jald ritu ke laayak ban-na hai. vo assisstant manager hai aur mai taxi driver vo bhala kaise mujh se shaadi ke baare mein sochegi. Philhaal to bas pyar ka hi sahaara hai. shaayad ushe meri aankho mein pyar nazar aa jaaye. Par phir bhi mujhe jald se jald kuch ban-na hoga. Baat ritu ki hi nahi hai. hamaara ek bacha bhi hai, chintoo. Mai chintoo ko bahut pyar dunga. Soch raha hun ki, bas chintoo ko hi rakhenge. Aur bacho ki kya jaroorat hai. hum dono ke liye ek bacha kaafi hai.
Date : 8-03-09
Kuch banta nazar nahi aa raha. ritu ke man mein mere liye nafrat jyon ki tyon hai. aaj mandir ke baahar ritu ne kuch aisa kah diya ki dil tut kar beekhar gaya hai. Ek ek tukda kaha jaa kar gira hai, pata nahi.
Par main ritu se bilkul naraaz nahin hun. apni jeendagi se bhala koyi naraaz hota hai. ushe mujhe kuch bhi kahne ka haq hai. vo meri jaan jo hai. par lagta hai mujhe apni jeendagi se dur rahna padega. main ritu ko aur jyada pareshaan nahi kar sakta. aise pyar ka kya faayda jo kishi ko pareshaan kare.
Vaise bhi itni jaldi mai kaha kuch ban paata. Aur phir ye status aur class ka chakkar to abhi baaki hai. mai jaanbujh kar haari huyi baaji khel raha tha. kal delhi jaane ki ticket book kara li hai. dukhi man se mujhe yaha se ab jaana hi hoga.
Vaise bhi na ritu se baat hoti hai. baat karne jaata hun to vo pareshaan hoti hai. ab letter daalna bhi ushne band karva rakha hai. main kaise ushka dil jeetunga. Mujhe yaha se chale jaana chaahiye.
Mere paapo ki yahi saja hai ki mai apne pyar ke liye tadap tadap kar marun……..
……………
billu ki diary padhte padhte meri aankhe nam ho gayi. ushka har ek shabd maano mere dil tak pahunch raha tha aur puch raha tha, “ritu do you love me”
maine diary ko maathe se laga liya. ush mein vo pyar tha, jo maine ab tak apni jeendagi mein nahi dekha tha.
tabhi meri nazar gift pack par gayi aur main ushe kholne lagi.
ushmein ek laal rang ki saree thi. jaise kishi dulhan ke liye ho. Diary mein ushke baare mein kuch nahi leekha tha. par main jaanti hun ki vo ye saree mere liye hi laaya hoga. Maine ush saree ko gale se laga liya.
maine bhagvaan se pucha, “hey bhagvaan agar aapko mujhe aur billu ko pyar ke bandhan mein baandhna tha to hamein itne lambe raste se kyon ghumaaya. Aur ab jab ye pyar ka phool khil gaya hai to ab billu kaha hai” ???
ye kuch aise sawaal the jinka mere paas koyi jawaab nahi hai aur shaayad na hi kabhi honge.
Date : 22-06-09
Aaj pure 3 mahine ho gaye kavita ki laash ko mile. Ushka antim sanskaar bhi ho chuka hai, par billu ka kuch nahi pata. Peechle hafte main khud kavita ke antim sanskaar mein shaamil hone ke liye delhi gayi thi. bahut wait kiya billu ka par aakhir mein thak haar kar kavita ka antim sanskaar karna hi pada.
Faridabad ja kar main jail mein sanjay se bhi milkar aayi hun.
Maine pucha, “billu kaha hai sanjay”
“Ushke hazaar tukde karke maine mumbai ke naalon mein baha diye hai, jao jaa kar chun lo, kuttiya kahin ki..hehehe..” —– sanjay ne hanste huve kaha.
Ishke alaawa main sanjay se kuch aur baat nahi kar paayi. Maine paap kiya tha to mujhe ahsaash tha ki maine galat kiya par sanjay ko apni galti ka koyi afsosh nahi hai. yahi shaayad hamaare samaaj ki sabse badi kamzori hai. aadmi hazaar paap karke bhi sheena choda karke ghum sakta hai, par aurat ki ek galti bhi ush par bahut bhaari padti hai aur shaari umar ushe nazre jhuka kar chalna padta hai.
Aaj mai ummeed kho chuki hun.
Ek pyar ka phool jo bas kheelne hi laga tha, murjha gaya. billu ke saath meri jo ek hansin jeendagi ho sakti thi, hone se pehle hi kho gayi. mujhe billu ko ye kahne ka moka bhi nahi mila ki “I love you too”.
Jab vo shaamne tha to main har pal ushe koshti rahti thi. aaj jab vo paas nahi hai to main ushke liye taras rahin hun. kaash vo kahin se aa jaaye to main apna dil ushke aage chir kar rakh dungi aur kahungi ki dekho tumhaara pyar kaha tak pahunch gaya hai. Main ushe kahungi ki tum vaakayi mein mere sharir se meri aatma tak pahunch gaye ho. Par ab kya ho sakta hai. ye baate ab bas sochi ja sakti hain. Jishe ye sab kahna tha, vo to na jaane kahan hai. ish diniya mein hai bhi ya nahi, ye bhi nahi pata.
Pata nahi ish sab ke liye kaun zimmedaar hai. bahut hi ajeeb khel khela hai ish jeendagi ne mere saath.
“Pyar kya hai mujhe nahi pata. Mujhe bas itna pata hai ki meri nazre ush inshaan ko dhund rahin hai, jishne mujhe barbaad kiya tha. kaash vo kahin se phir se aa jaaye aur main dil khol kar ushe kah sakun ki maine tumhe maaf kar diya, please ab mere paas raho aur ush pyar ke ahsaash mein mujhe dubo do jishmein tum khud dube huve ho”
Love is very special feeling. It happened to me in a very strange situation. But I welcome this gift of god in my life. I will cherish this love through out my life.
Ab shaayad billu ish duniya mein nahi hai, par kya huva ushka pyar hamesha mere saath rahega.
Hey bhagvaan billu ko maaf karna, for I have forgiven him. He is now my love. vo jahan bhi ho Ushka khyaal rakhna.
Aaj ye diary yahin band kar rahin hun. ab kuch aur leekhne ki himmat nahin hai aur vaise bhi kuch aur leekhne ko bacha bhi nahi hai.
——————
Date : 9-08-09
Aaj ye diary padhi. padh kar meri aankhe nam ho gayi hain.
Ritu ne mujh se ye diary chupa kar rakhi thi. aaj se main ishmein leekhna shuru kar raha hun.
“jatin ushe mat padhna tumhe dukh hoga aur main apne pati ko dukh nahi dena chaahti, vaise tumhe sab kuch pata hi hai” —– ritu ne mujh se kaha
main samajh sakta hun ki vo kyon nahi chaahti thi ki main ye diary na padhun.
shaadi se pehle ritu ne kaha tha, “jatin mujhe ek moka dena. Tumhaare liye main kuch bhi karungi. Mujhe nahi pata ki main ek patni ka farz nibha paaungi ya nahi par jab baat tumhaari hai to main kuch bhi kar jaaungi. I love you”
jab se ritu se shaadi huyi hai jeendagi khil uthi hai. hamaari shaadi ko lagbagh ek mahina ho gaya hai. par hum abhi normal husband wife ki tarah karib nahi aa paaye hain. Ritu puraani baate nahi bhula paayi hai. haan mujh se pyar bahut karti hai
abhi thodi der pehle baathroom se naha kar nikli to sharmaate huve bhaag kar bedroom mein ghuss gayi. vo hamesha concious rahti hai ki main ushe dekh raha hun.
par jab vo bathroom se nikli thi to maine khud apni nazre ghuma li thi. main ushe pura time de raha hun. mujhe ushka sharir paane ki koyi jaldi nahin hai.
vaise bhi ye jism ki baat nahi hai balki ushke dil tak pahunchna hai, lambi duri taiy karne mein vakt to lagta hai. ye Jagjit Singh ki gazal bilkul meri situation par bani lagti hai.
jo bhi ho ritu ke saath ek chhat ke neeche rahne ka bahut pyara ahsaash hai. she is very beautiful women. Lets see how our marriage life moves forward. Looking forwad for a day when I will have her in my arms and I will say to her while looking into her eyes “ritu you are the most beautiful women and I am proud to have you in my life”
lekin abhi vo sharmaati itna hai ki dur dur rahti hai. dekhte hai kab tak mere pyar se dur rahegi.
Date : 9-08-09
3:00 pm
Aaj Sunday hai aur hum dono ghar par hi hain. Abhi abhi lunch kiya hai. ritu bahut acha khaana banaati hai. dar lagta hai ki kahin main kha kha kar mota na ho jaaun. Par vo itne pyar se daal daal kar deti hai ki main khaata chala jaata hun.
Aaj ritu ne bahut saare item banaaye the, jishke kaaran bahut thak gayi thi, ishliye bedroom mein jaa kar sho gayi. mujhe kah rahi thi ki bas yu hi late rahin hun. par abhi maine dekha to paya ki vo shoyi huyi hai.
pehli baar aaj ushe shote huve dekha hai. nahi to vo raat ko to alag shoti hi hai, dopahar ko bhi apne bedroom ki kundi laga kar shoti hai. aaj galti se kundi khuli rah gayi shaayad, kyonki ushe pata hi nahi hoga ki neend aa jaayegi
Jo bhi hai mujhe ushe shote huve dekhna bahut acha lag raha hai. bilkul ek maasum bache ki tarah paanv sikod kar sho rahi hai. ushe bilkul hosh nahi hai ki main ushke saamne baitha hun varna abhi uth jaati. main chupchaap ushke saamne kursi par baith kar ye diary leekh raha hun. ushke karib hone ka bahut pyara ahsaash ho raha hai mujhe
Mujhe bilkul nahi pata ki pyar kya hai. mere liye ish shabd ko define karna bahut mushkil kaam hai. meri jeendagi mein ye bahut ajeeb haalaat mein aaya hai. haan log kahte hain ki pyar ka dushra naam bhagvaan hai. pata nahi ki log ish baat par vishwaas karte hai ya nahi, haan par mujhe pura yakin hai ki bhagvaan ka dushra naam ritu hai. vahi mera sab kuch hai, vahi mere liye bhagvaan hai aur hamesha rahegi.
8 march ko mumbai se bahut dukhi man se gaya tha. pata nahi tha ki vaapis aaunga ya nahi. mujhe lagne laga tha ki main bevajah ritu par apna pyar thop raha hun. pehle ush par apni havash thopi thi ab pyar bhi thopunga to pyar aur havash mein kya anter rah jaayega.
Mumbai vaapis aane ka socha nahi tha, par ritu ko ek baar dekhne ke liye main phir se mumbai kheencha chala aaya. 28 june ko shaam ke koyi 5 baje main mumbai pahunch gaya.
mumbai mein paanv rakhte hi mere tan badan mein ek ajeeb si bechaini hone lagi. jald se jald ritu ko dekhna chaahta tha. par main dubaara ritu ko koyi pareshaani bhi nahi dena chaahta tha. ishliye soch raha tha ki kaise ushe bina pareshaan kiye ek baar dekha jaaye.
Main ritu ke ghar ke saamne pahunch gaya. Thodi der tak ritu ki khidki ko dekhta raha. dil bas ritu ko ek baar dekhne ke liye taras raha tha. main soch raha tha ki pata nahi kaisi hogi meri ritu. ek ghanta ho gaya. Ritu khidki mein nahi aayi. Maine socha chalo gate way of India par ghum aata hun. baad mein try karunga. kya pata vo kahin gayi huyi ho.
Main gate way of India pahunch kar ushi jagah khada ho gaya jahaan main ritu ke gale lag kar behosh huva tha.
ush pal ko main kabhi nahi bhula paaya. balki vo ahsaash abhi tak mere saath hai. ritu se shaadi ho chuki hai, par abhi tak hum gale bhi nahi mile hain. Bahut saare kaaran hain ish baat ke.
Khair main ushi ahsaash ko dubaara paana chaahta tha, ishliye vaha jhuk kar maine ush jamin ko chum liya jahaan ritu khadi huyi thi.
jee haan, pyar aapse bahut kuch ajeeb karva deta hai. sabhi log dekh rahe the ki main kya kar raha hun. par mujhe logo se koyi matlab nahi tha. mujhe to ush ahsaash ko dubaara jeena tha. aur phir main khada ho kar samunder ki taraf ghum kar bilkul vaise hi khada ho gaya jaise ush din khada tha. bilkul ushi din ki tarah main samunder ko dekhte dekhte ushki vishaalta mein kho gaya.
Vakt jaise khud ko dohra raha tha. mujhe bilkul yakin nahi tha ki bhagvaan mujhe ritu se bilkul ushi din ki tarah milvaayenge.
Main to samunder mein kho chuka tha, achaanak mujhe mere peeche se awaaj aayi
“Tum khud ko samajhte kya ho, billu”
main jhat se ghum gaya aur maine jo dekha ush par vishwaas karna mushkil tha.
ritu ek chote bache ki tarah aankho mein aanshu ley kar mere saamne khadi thi. aisa lag raha tha jaise ki kishi bache ka khilona kho gaya ho aur vo ushke liye ro raha ho.
Main itna hairaan tha ki kuch nahi kah paaya bas aankhe phaad kar ritu ko dekhta raha.
“Kahaan chale gaye the tum” —- ritu ne rote huve pucha.
Mujhe kuch samajh nahi aa raha tha ki kya karun. Maine kabhi ritu ko aisi haalat mein nahi dekha tha
Maine ritu ke kandhe ki aur haath badhaaya aur kaha, “ritu please chup ho jao”
Phir kuch ish tareeke se ritu ne apne pyar ka izhaar kiya ki meri aankhe bhar aayi.
“Mujhe chune ki koshish bhi mat karna, tumhe pyar karne ka ye matlab nahi hai ki tum mere sharir se kheloge” ritu ne kaha… aur kah kar peeche ki aur hat gayi.
“nahin ritu tum mujhe galat samajh rahi ho, main tumhaare sharir ka bhuka nahin hun, vo billu jo tumhaare sharir ka bhuka tha kab ka mar chuka hai, aaj tumhaare saamne jo khada hai vo jatin hai. main to bas tumhe chup karaane ki koshish kar raha tha. dekho chup ho jao, log hamein hi dekh rahe hain” — maine bhaavuk ho kar kaha.
“Tum mere flat ke saamne se mujh se miley bina nikal gaye, tumhe sharam nahi aayi, kaisa pyar hai tumhaara” — ritu ne kaha.
“Nahin ritu aisi baat nahi hai, main to tumhaare ghar ke saamne ek ghanta khada raha tha. tum khidki mein nahi deekhi to thodi der yaha ghumne chala aaya. Ush din ki yaad taaja kar raha tha jish din tumne mujhe gale lagaaya tha. main abhi thodi der mein vaapis aane wala tha” —- maine ritu ki aankho mein dekh kar kaha.
“Sach bol rahe ho” — ritu ne apni aankho se aanshu punchte huve kaha.
Ritu ke chehre par pyari si maasumiyat thi
“Haan ritu main yaha tumhaare liye hi to aaya hun, varna yaha mera aur kaun hai” — maine kaha.
Ritu thodi shaant huyi aur boli, “main jab khidki mein aayi to tumhe bas jaate huve dekha. Tumhe nahi pata ki mere dil par kya beeti, bhaag kar aayi hun main yaha”
“Ritu mujhe yakin nahi tha ki tum mujhe itne pyar se milogi, main to bas tumhe ek baar dekhne aaya tha, do you love me” ? —– maine pucha.
“Billu pehle tum ye bataao ki tum the kahaan, kavita ko dekhne bhi nahi aaye, kya meri baat itni buri lag gayi thi. mera to chalo kuch nahi par kavita ?? kaise bhul gaye apni didi ko tum. Tumhaara bahut intzar kiya,tum nahi aaye to tumhaare bina hi kavita ka antim sanskaar karna pada. Kyon kiya ye sab ?” —– ritu ne bhaavuk ho kar pucha.
“Ritu sab kuch bataata hun, par mujhe billu mat kaho. billu ab mar chuka hai. Mera naam jatin hai. sharam aati hai mujhe tumhaare muh se billu shun kar. Tum meri baat samajh sakti ho… hain na” — maine kaha.
“Mujhe pata hai tumhaara naam jatin hai, maine tumhaari puri inquary karva rakhi hai, acha naam hai. tumhe pata hai jatin ka matlab kya hai, jatin means sage or muni. Par tum to kuch aur hi ho” —- ritu ne kaha
“mujhe pata hai jatin ka matlab kya hai ritu, aur ish naam ke gun bachpan se mere ander hain” — maine kaha.
“Acha chalo chhodo, mujhe ab ye bataao ki tum kaun si duniya mein chale gaye the ki apni didi ko bhi dekhne nahi aaye” — ritu ne gambhir ho kar kaha.
“Theek hai ritu tumhe aaj sab kuch bataaunga, ye bhi bataaunga ki main kahaan tha aur apni jeendagi ke baare mein bhi bataaunga, chalo kishi restaurant mein chalte hain, baat lambi hai, yahaan khade khade thak jaayenge” — maine kaha.
“Theek hai main shun-na chaahti hun billu….mm matlab jatin…… sorry aage se tumhe bas jatin hi kahungi, lekin yahin baat karenge, restaurant jaane mein vakt lagega, main aur intezaar nahi kar sakti” — ritu ne kaha.
“pehli baar meri jaan itne pyar se mili hai, restaurant to tumhe ley jaana hi padega, chalo na please araam se baat karenge” — maine kaha
“kya main tumhaari jaan hun jatin” — ritu ne meri aur dekh kar pucha.
“Haan ritu, you are my life, infact you are my god, tabhi to main aaj phir yahaan kheencha chala aaya, aur bhagvaan ka chamatkaar dekho aaj tum mere shaamne aankho mein pyar ley kar khadi ho. We are in love, hain na ritu” —- maine kaha
“tum mujhe pehle ye bataao ki kahaan the tum? , baaki ki baate baad mein karenge. Thodi der khade rah kar thak nahi jaayenge, jaldi bataao, kahan the” —- ritu ne kaha.
Maine phir ritu ko restaurant ke liye insist nahi kiya. Hum dono vahin divaar ke saath ek dushre ki aur muh karke khade ho gaye.
“Ritu mai 8 march ko bahut dukhi man se tumhaare ghar se chala tha. agle din ki delhi ki ticket book karva rakhi thi. par kishmat ko kuch aur hi manjoor tha. main delhi jaane ki bajaaye pune pahunch gaya” —- maine kaha
“pune !! pune kya karne gaye the” —- ritu ne pucha

 

[The Immortal]

in my words :—–
ye ek alag hi kahaani hai. bachpan se main thoda spiritual raha hun. aksar shaant jagah dekh kar main aankhe band karke baith jaata tha. tumhe ye baat thodi ajeeb lagegi lekin ye sach hai.
Ek baar school mein history ke teacher ne bhagvaan buddh ki kahaani shunaayi thi. ush kahaani ki kuch khaas panktiyaan mujhe aaj tak yaad hain.
Kahaani ke anushaar bhagvaan buddh ko bodhvriksha ke neeche enligtenment huyi thi. mere man mein bachpan se ye sawaal baar baar aaya hai ki kya hai ye enlightenment.
Pata to kuch tha nahin. main aksar shaant jagah dekh kar chupchaap aankhe band karke baith jaaya karta tha. kyonki maine shuna tha ki bhagvaan buddh bhi aankhe band karke baitha karte the. par kabhi kuch khaas ahsaash nahi huva.
Jab bhi aankhe band karta tha to bas andhera hi deekhta tha. vaise bachpan mein itna kuch pata bhi nahi tha meditation ke baare mein. Lekin pata nahin kyon main phir bhi kuch na kuch try karta rahta tha
Didi jab mujhe kabhi aisi haalat mein dekhti thi to kahti thi, “jatin kya koyi jholachaap baba ban-ne ka iraada hai, chalo padhaayi karo”
Didi aksar mujhe jatin kah kar hi bulaati thi. vaise har koyi mujhe bachpan se billu kah kar hi bulaata hai
Maine Osho ki maditation practices ke baare mein kaafi shun rakha tha. par kabhi kishi jagah ja kar try nahi kiya tha.
Jab main ush din tumhaare ghar se nikla tha to man bahut jyada udaas tha. delhi jaane ka bilkul man nahi tha. aur main mumbai mein ruk kar tumhe aur jyada pareshaan nahi karna chaahta tha.
Pune mein jo osho ashram hai ushke baare mein kaafi shun rakha tha. man mein achaanak ek vichaar aaya ki chalo pune chalta hun aur kuch maditation sikhta hun, shaayad dukhi man ko kuch shaanti mil jaaye.
Maine jeendagi mein tumhe barbaad karne ke alaawa koyi bura kaam nahi kiya. Par tumhe barbaad karna hi mera sabse bada paap ban gaya. Agar ush vakt tum mujhe apna leti to mere dil ka bojh halka ho jaata, par aisa ho nahi paaya. tumhe paane ki ummeed kho chuka tha. aise mein meditation mein mujhe roshni ki ek kiran nazar aa rahi thi.
Maine shun rakha tha ki meditation mein inshaan mar kar ek naya janam leta hai. aur ish tarah main apne ander ke ush billu ko maarne nikal pada jishe tum jaanti thi
Aur ish tarah mein pune pahunch gaya
Mera ek college ka friend, madan pune mein ek call center mein laga hai. mujhe bhi ushne vahi lagva diya. madan bhi osho ke ashram jaata rahta tha. maine 4-5 baar ashram ja kar dynamic meditation seekh li. Ushke baad mein madan ke ghar par roj subah dynamic meditation karne laga.
Dynamic meditation ka 3 mahine ka ek pura complete cycle hota hai. ishe pura kar liya jaaye to inshaan ko kuch bahut gahre ahsaash hote hain. Unko shabdo mein nahi kaha ja sakta.
Pure 3 mahine maine ye meditation ki. kabhi madan ke ghar par aur kabhi ashram par. Ish meditaion ne meri jeendagi badal di. Main billu se jatin ban gaya. Pehle bas naam ka jatin tha. ish meditation ke baad sach mein jatin ban gaya.
“hmm…. to tum meditation seekh rahe the, ishliye apni didi ko dekhne nahi aaye, mujhe ye sab shun kar bilkul acha nahi lag raha jatin. Kuch kaam aise hote hain jinhe aap kabhi nahi taal sakte. Tum apni didi ko bhula kar aatma parmaatma ke chakkar mein pad gaye, kya tumhe nahi lagta ki tumne bahut galat kiya hai, aur tum meditation seekhne bhi kahaan gaye,….ek sex guru ke asharam mein, lagta hai tum khud ko dhoka de rahe ho” ritu ne kaha
“aisi baat nahi hai main didi ko ush haalat mein tv par hi nahi dekh paaya to vaha ja kar kaise dekh leta. Mere ander itni himmat nahi thi ritu. Maine to ish baat ko hi swikaar nahi kiya ki vo meri didi hi thi. haan par aaj baat dushri hai. aaj main bahut shaant hun. 3 mahine jo maine meditation ki hai, ushne meri jeendagi badal di hai. vaise kaafi had tak to tumhaare pyar mein main badal hi chuka tha, baaki ka kaam ish mediatation ne kar diya aur ish tarah billu maara gaya. Aur haan osho par sex guru ka thappa vo log lagaate hain jo sex mein upar se neeche tak dube huve hain, maine osho ko khub padha hai unhone kabhi sex ko promote nahi kiya” —- maine kaha.
“Mujhe laga sanjay ne tumhaare saath kuch aisa vaisa kar diya. vo ush din jish din tum aakhri baar letter daalne aaye the, tumhaare peeche hi gaya tha. ushne mujhe bataaya tha ki ushne tumhaare tukde tukde karke mumbai ke naalo mein baha diye. Main ye shun kar soch baithi thi ki ab tum ish duniya mein nahi ho” —- ritu ne kaha
“ritu inshaan frustration mein kaafi kuch bol jaata hai. sanjay ne yu hi tumhe pareshaan karne ke liye bol diya hoga. This is natural tendancy of frustrated person” ———- maine kaha
“par mujhe lagta hai ki tumhe ek baar to kavita ke liye aana chaahiye tha” — ritu ne kaha

 

[The Immortal]

“ye baat main ab samajh raha hun, par pehle himmat nahi thi. mere dil mein jo didi ki ek shunder tasvir thi ushe hata kar main ek kankaal vaha nahi beethaana chaahta tha” —- maine kaha
phir hum thodi der shaant khade rahe. Meri nazar ritu ke chehre par gayi to vahin ja kar tik gayi. main ritu ko pyar se dekhne laga. pehli baar vo dil mein pyar ley kar mere paas khadi thi. bahut pyara ahsaash ho raha tha mujhe ush vakt
“kya dekh rahe ho” —- ritu ne pucha
“apni jaan ko dekh raha hun ki kaisi hai meri jaan, bahut pyari lag rahi ho, I love you” — maine kaha.
“Jatin mujhe maaf kardo maine ush din mandir ke baahar tumhe na jaane kya kya bol diya tha” —- ritu ne kaha
“I love you ritu” —– maine kaha
“jatin main kah rahi thi ki mujhe maaf kardo maine ush din mandir ke baahar tumhe na jaane kya kya bol diya tha” —– ritu ne kaha
main itna bhaavuk ho raha tha ki mujhe kuch nahi shun raha tha. maine phir apne pyar ka izhaar kiya
“I love you ritu, do you love me” ? —- maine pucha
“tumhe meri aankho mein kya nazar aa raha hai, jatin” —– ritu ne bade pyar se meri aankho mein dekh kar pucha.
“Pyar nazar aa raha hai, ish samunder se bhi gahra pyar nazar aa raha hai, jishke kinaare hum khade hain, aisa kaise ho gaya ritu” —- maine bhaavuk ho kar pucha
“pata nahi jatin, main khud hairaan hun ki mein kaise tumhe pyar kar sakti hun, par jo bhi hai ye sach hai ki I love you, kya tumhe pata hai ki tum mujhe kyon pyar karte ho” —- ritu ne pucha
maine kaha, “nahi pata, bas itna pata hai ki tumhaare bina jee nahi sakta, meditation mein bahut gahre ahsaash pa kar bhi tumhe bhula nahi paaya. abhi kuch dino pehle mere saath kuch ajeeb huva. mein dynamic meditation karne ke baad shaanti se aankh band karke baith gaya, pata hai mujhe apne ander kya deekhaayi diya”
“kya deekhaayi diya jatin” —- ritu ne pucha
“mujhe tum deekhaayi di ritu, bade pyar se mushkura rahi thi. ush din maine decide kiya ki dynamic meditation khatam karke tumhe dekhne mumbai aaunga. Aur dekho aaj main aa gaya. Par aaj pata chala ki vo bhagvaan ka sanket tha ki jao, tumhaara pyar tumhe bula raha hai. dekho aaj tum aankho mein pyar ley kar mere saamne khadi ho, lagta hai mujhe sab kuch mil gaya. I love you ritu, I realy love you a lot” —- maine bhaavuk ho kar kaha
aakhri ki lines bolte huve meri aankho mein aanshu utar aaye.
“tumhaare ishi pyar ne mere man mein pyar jagaaya hai, varna to main tumse bahut nafrat karti thi” —- ritu ne bhi bhaavuk ho kar kaha
maine dekha ki ritu ki bhi bolte bolte aankhe bhar aayi thi.
love is really a very wonderfull gift of god. Ush vakt mujhe aisa lag raha tha ki main chaand par pahunch gaya hun. khud ko bahut halka mahsush kar raha tha.
maine ritu ke kandhe ki aur haath badhaaya
“nahin, mujhe chuna mat, maine kaha na mere pyar ka ye matlab nahin hai ki tum mere sharir se kheloge” —– ritu ne meri aankho mein dekh kar kaha
maine apna haath vaapis kheench liya. main bas ushe chu kar kahna chaahta tha ki tum meri jeendagi ho. Par ushki baat mujhe bilkul buri nahi lagi. vaise bhi jo aapki jaan ho ushki baat kya kabhi buri lagti hai.
“ritu mujh se shaadi karogi” ——- maine bahut bhaavuk ho kar pucha
ritu thodi der tak mujhe dekhti rahi aur phir apni nazre jhuka li. Main badi besabri se ushke jawaab ka intezaar kar raha tha.
“jatin main aaj tumhaare liye kuch bhi karne ko taiyaar hun, pyar jo ho gaya hai tumse, par ek baat se pareshaan hun ki hamaari shaadi ka aadhaar kya hoga” —- ritu ne pucha
“kya ish pyar ke baad kishi aadhaar ki jaroorat rah gayi hai ritu, ye apne aap mein sabse bada aadhaar hai” —- maine kaha
“kya log ye nahi samjhenge ki hamaari shaadi ka aadhaar havash hai” —- ritu ne kaha
“kya tumhe aaj bhi vo sab kuch yaad hai jo hamne havash mein dub kar kiya tha” —- maine pucha
“nahin main to ushe bahut pehle bhula chuki hun, tabhi to tumhe baar baar kah rahin hun ki mujhe chuna mat, main ush paap ko ek pal ko bhi yaad nahi karna chaahti” —- ritu ne kaha
“main bhi aaj vo sab kuch bhula chuka hun ritu. Tabhi maine kaha ki vo billu mar chuka hai. aaj bas ish dil mein pyar hai.peechle dino maine kuch yaad kiya to vo din tha jish din tumne mujhe yaha gale lagaaya tha. main bhi ush paap ko yaad nahi karna chaahta. Hum dono ish jeendagi mein bahut neeche gire the. Aaj badi mushkil se sambhlein hain. Yaha se hamein ek nayi shuruvaat karni hai. hamaari shaadi ka aadhaar ye pyar hai ritu aur kuch nahin. tum kahogi to main tumhe jeendagi bhar nahi chuvunga, aaj mere dil mein bas pyar hai, havash ko main bahut peeche chhod chuka hun” —— maine kaha
“tumhaari baate mere dil ko chu rahi hain jatin, par bahut mushkilein hain hamaari shaadi mein. Main samajh nahi pa rahin hun ki apne papa ko kya kahungi. Maine aaj tak unki baat nahi taali hai. papa mujhe sidharth ke saath shaadi karne ko kah rahe the. maine unhe kah diya tha ki main sidharth se shaadi nahi karungi aur apni jeendagi ka safar akele taiy karungi. Ab unhe kish muh se kahungi ki main shaadi karna chaahti hun, vo bhi ush inshaan se jishke kaaran meri pehli shaadi tuti hai. vo yahi samjhenge ki main havash mein andhi ho gayi hun. unhe kaise samjhaaungi ye pyar jo hamein khud bhi abhi tak samajh nahi aaya hai. chalo hum to phir bhi samajh hi rahe hain, ye duniya kabhi nahi samjhegi jatin. ab tum hi bataao ki kya karun main” ——- ritu ne meri aankho mein dekh kar kaha
ye shun kar meri aankhe nam ho gayi. maine kaha, “ to ishka matlab tum mujh se shaadi nahi karogi, hain na, kyonki ish duniya ko ye pyar samajh nahi aayega. tum mujhe ye bataao ki aaj tak kish ka pyar ish duniya ko samajh aaya hai, jo hamaara aayega. agar sab log aisa sochenge to koyi pyar ko anjaam tak ley jaane ki himmat nahi karega. Bada dukh huva tumhaare muh se ye sab shun kar. Par chalo chhodo”
“nahin jatin tum mujhe galat samajh rahe ho, maine kaha na ki main tumhaare liye kuch bhi karungi, tumhe pyar jo kiya hai, main to bas apni duvidha tumhe bata rahi thi. please don’t mind. I love you. Main tumhaari hun jatin. Please don’t take me wrong” —– ritu ne kaha
“kya sach kah rahi ho ritu ? please main tumhaare liye bahut emotional hun, mujhe saaf saaf kah do ki kya tum mujh se shaadi karogi. Main sach jaan-na chaahta hun. I don’t want to force you into any thing now. Jo bhi man mein ho bol do” maine kaha
“bataao kab karni hai shaadi jatin, main taiyaar hun. main bas apni concern bata rahi thi. mere liye apne ghar walo ko samjhaana mushkil hoga. Khaaskar mere papa ye baat nahi samjhenge. Par ye jeendagi meri hai. tumhe apna dil diya hai. ab ish pyar ke liye main kishi bhi anjaam tak jaane ko taiyaar hun. pata hai tum yaha nahi the to main har pal tumhe dekhne ke liye tarasti thi. har taraf meri nazre tumhe dhundati thi. aaj bhi jab khidki se tumhe jaate huve dekha to bhaag kar tumse milne yaha chali aayi. Jeetna tum mujhe pyar karte ho utna hi main bhi karti hun. jaldi se date decide kar lo main taiyaar hun. par yaad rakhna shaadi koyi khel nahi hai. bahut badi zeemmedaari hoti hai shaadi ke baad. Kya tumhe yakin hai ki tum ye zeemmedaari neebha paaoge” —- ritu ne kaha.
“Bilkul ritu maine to apne parivar ke liye bahut kuch soch rakha hai. main umar mein tumse chhota sahi par tazurbein mein tumse kahin aage hun. bahut kuch seekha hai ish chhoti se jeendagi mein. Tum chinta mat karo main ek pati ke saare farz nibhaaunga.” —- maine kaha
“par jatin, mujhe khud par yakin nahin hai ki main ek patni ke saare farz nibha paaungi ya nahi. mujhe ek moka dena jatin. Main puri koshis karungi” —- ritu ne kaha
ritu ne ye baat meri aankho mein dekh kar kuch ish tarah kahi ki main madhosh ho gaya.
Man kar raha tha ki ritu ko gale laga lun. Par main jaanta tha ki vo aisa hargeez nahi karne degi.
Kuch na kuch karne ka mera man to tha, jish se ki apne dil ki bhaavnaao ko deekha sakun.
Maine apne anguthe ko daanto se cheer diya aur ushmein se jo khun nikla ushe jhat se ritu ki maang mein bhar diya
“Jatin ye kya kiya, paagal ho gaye ho kya” ? ritu ne thoda gusse mein kaha.
“Mita do agar chaaho to, par tum ab meri patni ho, mujhe ish duniya se koyi matlab nahi hai” —– maine kaha
“main ishe mitaane ko nahi kah rahin hun, main to ye kah rahi thi ki ye angutha cheerne ki kya jaroorat thi tumhe. Main vaise bhi ab tumhaari hi hun” —- ritu ne bhaavuk ho kar kaha
“bas tumhe gale lagaana chaah raha tha. samajh nahi aa raha tha ki kaise apne dil ki bhaavna ko tumhe deekhaaun. Ishliye apne khun se tumhaari maang bhar di” —- maine kaha
ush vakt hum thodi der bina kuch kahe khade rahe. Hum dono ki aankho mein aanshu the. Kuch nahi pata tha ki hamaare riste ka matlab kya hai, par hum dono ek dushre ke saath chalne ko taiyaar the. Pyar bhi ajeeb cheez hai. ishko samajhna sach mein bahut mushkil kaam hai.
kab raat ke 9 baj gaye pata hi nahi chala.
“Chalein ab jatin, kaafi andhera ho gaya hai, mujhe andhere se dar lagta hai” —– ritu ne kaha
aur ish tarah hamaari khaamosi tuti.
“Theek hai chalte hain, ab mujhe shaadi ka intezaam bhi karna hai, kaafi kuch sochna padega. chalo sab manage ho jaayega, hamaara pyar hamaare saath hai na. Filhaal chalte hain” —- maine kaha.

 

[The Immortal]

“haan chalo baaki ki baatein baad mein karenge” — ritu ne kaha
“ruko pehle ish jagah ka dhanyavaad karte hain. Ish jagah ne hamaare pyar ke phool ko kheelte huve dekha hai. yaha hum chaaro taraf apne pyar ki khusboo chhod kar ja rahein hain. Chalo aankhe band karke ish jagah ka sukriya karein aur bhagvaan se duva karein ki yaha jo bhi aaye man mein pyar aur shaanti ley kar jaaye” —- maine kaha
“tum to koyi philosopher ban kar lote ho. Ye kya meditation ka asar hai, ya phir kuch aur jo main nahi jaanti” —– ritu ne kaha
“mujhe nahi pata kishka asar hai, haan par tumhaare pyar ka bahut gahra asar hai mujh par. Aaj bahut jyada khus hun. aaj tumhe aakhri baar dekhne aaya tha aur dekho tum hamesha ke liye meri ho gayi. meri jaan aaj meri patni ban gayi” ——– maine kaha
ritu ne kuch nahi kaha aur nazre jhuka kar mushkura di. Bahut pyari lagti hai ritu aise nazre jhuka kar mushkuraate huve. Ush vakt main bahut khus tha ki ritu ab meri jeendagi mein aa gayi hai.
“chalo ab aankhe band karke prayer karein, phir chalte hain” — maine ritu se kaha...
hum dono ne aankhe band karke man hi man prayer ki aur phir saath saath ritu ke ghar ki aur chal pade.
Hum dono raaste bhar apne khaayalo mein khoye rahe aur ek dushre se kuch nahi kaha. Bas chalte chalte ek dushre ki taraf dekh kar mushkura dete the.
Ritu ka flat kab a gaya pata hi nahi chala. Main man hi man duva kar raha tha ki ritu ka ghar thodi der aur na aaye aur hum yu hi saath saath chalte rahein. Par ghar kaafi nazdeek tha. hum bahut jaldi vahaan pahunch gaye.
“Theek hai ritu tumhaara ghar aa gaya, ab tum jao, main chalta hun” —- maine kaha
“kahan jaaoge, jatin” ? — ritu ne pucha
“tum meri chinta mat karo, main chala jaaunga, bahut theekane hain rukne ke mere paas, aur phir hotel to hai hi” —- maine kaha
“kya tum hotel mein rukoge ?? , ye ghar ab tumhaara hai jatin, 3 bedroom hain ghar mein. Mujhe acha lagega agar tum mere saath rahoge to” —- ritu ne kaha
ye shun kar dil bahut bhaavuk ho gaya. Itna pyar aur sammaan de rahi thi ritu ki dil thaame nahi tham raha tha. lag raha tha ki main ro padunga.
maine man hi man socha ki ritu ka man vaakayi mein ushke sharir se bhi jyada shunder hai. vaise mujhe ye baat hamesha se pata thi ki vo ek achi inshaan hai.
maine kaha, “nahi ritu samjha karo, kishi ne dekh liya to bevajah badnaami hogi. ab bas shaadi karne ke baad hi ish ghar mein ghusunga. Aur vaise bhi main bahut bhaavuk ho raha hun tumhaare liye. tumhaare saath ruk gaya to kahin bahak na jaaun”
“tumhaari taange tod dungi tum bahak kar to deekhaao, ab main vo ritu nahin hun jo tumhaare bahkaave mein aa jaaungi” — ritu ne kaha
“pata hai, ab tum jhansi ki rani ban chuki ho. Mujhe to khud tumse dar lagne laga hai….hehehe… Pata nahi kab talvaar se mujhe kaat daalo. Ek baat bataao kya tumhe bandook chalaani aati hai” —- maine pucha
“nahin… kyon kya huva” —- ritu ne pucha
“sukar hai, varna to ush din jangal mein tum mera bheja uda deti. Maine socha bhi nahi tha ki tum pistol ley kar fire bhi kar sakti ho. Meri taang se goli cho kar nikal gayi varna jeendagi bhar langda kar chalna padta” —- maine kaha
“sorry jatin ush vakt haalaat hi kuch aise the. Mujhe tum se itni nafrat thi ki tumhe maar dena chaahti thi. Haan par aaj tumhe bahut pyar karti hun. tum aao to sahi. Hum alag alag bedroom mein shoyenge. Ab tum mere pati ho jatin. Meri maang apne khun se kya majaak mein bhari thi tumne” —- ritu ne kaha
“Ab aisi baate mat karo main ro padunga, kyon itna pyar de rahi ho. Sambhaalna mushkil ho raha hai. Main samajh sakta hun ki tumhe meri chinta hai. don’t worry about me jaan, I will be fine. Abhi jaane do. Shaadi ke baare mein bhi planning karni hai. bahut jaldi mein tumhe sab kuch final karke bata dunga. Now you go and take care. Haan apna mobile number de do kuch kaam huva to phone karunga” —- maine kaha
“theek hai jatin, jaisa tum theek samjho, apna khyaal rakhna aur phir se kahin gaayab mat ho jaana” —- ritu ne kaha
maine ritu se mobile number ley liya.
ritu good night kah kar ghar mein chali gayi. main ushe jaate huve dekhta raha.
ghar mein jaate hi vo khidki mein aa gayi. maine ushe bye kiya aur chal pada.
Jaate huve mein baar baar khidki ki aur dekh raha tha. ritu ke chehre par bahut pyare bhaav the. Mujhe hamaare beech ek pyara sa rista banta nazar aa raha tha.

 

[The Immortal]

Pune se chalte vakt madan ne mujhe apne ek friend, dinesh ka number diya tha. ush din main dinesh se phone par baat karke ushke ghar ki location puch kar ushke ghar chala gaya.
3-4 din main ritu se nahi mil paaya. mujhe chinta ho rahi thi ki pehle kuch kaam to mil jaaye yaha mumbai mein. Aise khaali peeli shaadi ka kya faayda. Pune mein call center ka experience ho gaya tha. dinesh ne mujhe kuch call centers ke naam bataaye aur maine ek jagah jaa kar join kar liya. call center colaba ke nazdeek hi tha.
phir maine shaadi ke baare mein sochna shuru kiya.
28 june ke baad, Ek baar bhi ritu se milne nahi ja saka. Main sab kuch final karke hi ritu se milna chaahta tha.
Maine ek pandit se shaadi ki date nikalwaayi. 12 July ko subh mahurat baith raha tha.
Maine ushi mandir mein shaadi ka intezaam kiya jahaan ritu aksar jaaya karti thi. pujaari ko mushkil se paise de kar pataaya ki chinta ki koyi baat nahi hai, shaadi mandir mein karne ki iccha hai ishliye kar rahe hain. Ghar walo ka koyi virodh nahi hai.
5 july ko main shaam ko ritu se milne gaya.
Maine ritu ke ghar ki bell bajaayi
Ritu ne darvaaja khola aur ek pyari si hansi se mera swaagat kiya aur boli, “to mil gaya janaab ko mere liye vakt, the kahaan aap itne dino se?”
Maine kaha, “chalo gate way of India par ghumte huve baat karenge, bahut jaroori baat karni hai tum se”
“Tumne kya ish ghar mein na aane ki kasam kha rakhi hai, tumhaari patni hun main koyi gair nahin hun, tum ush khun ka matlab nahi jaante shaayad par mujhe pata hai. aao na main coffee bana rahi thi. aao dono saath saath peeyenge” —- ritu ne kaha
ritu ne itne pyar se bulaaya ki main khud ko rok nahi paaya aur ghar ke ander aa gaya
maine charo aur dekh kar kaha, “bahut pyara ghar hai tumhaara ritu”
“tumhaara nahi hamaara jatin, ye hamaara ghar hai” — ritu ne kitchen ki aur jaate huve kaha
“tum baitho main coffee ley kar aa rahin hun” — ritu ne kitchen ke ander se awaaj lagaayi
main kursi par baith gaya.
Ritu coffee ley kar aayi. Ushke chehre par ajeeb si chamak thi.
Maine pucha, “ kya baat hai, itni khus kyon ho”
“Aaj tum pehli baar ghar jo aaye ho, bahut khus hun” —- ritu ne kaha
“ritu hum 12 july ko shaadi kar rahein hain” — maine kaha
“kya itni jaldi, kaise manage hoga sab kuch” — ritu ne hairaan ho kar pucha
“arey hum mandir mein shaadi kar rahein hain, ishmein kya manage karna hai. jahaan tum har Sunday jaati ho na vahin shaadi karenge, maine saara intezaam kar liya hai. aur haan maine ek call center join kar liya hai. ab main pati ban-ne ke liye taiyaar hun” —– maine kaha
“maine to abhi tak ghar par bhi baat nahin ki ish baare mein, samajh nahi aa raha ki kaise baat karun main” — ritu ne kaha
“kar lo ritu, ek baar unhe bata do, phir dekhte hain ki kya hota hai, aur haan mein nikalta hun, mujhe call center jaana hai” —- maine kaha
“kya aaj tumhaari chuti nahi hai jatin” —- ritu ne pucha
“chuti thi par koyi emergency aa gayi hogi mujhe abhi thodi der pehle phone karke bulaaya hai. aur haan apne ghar baat kar lo. Jishe invite karna hai kar lo hum har haal mein 12 ko shaadi kar rahein hain.. ok… bye” —- maine kaha aur chal pada
“tum kahaan ruke ho jatin” — ritu ne pucha
maine kaha, “ek dost ke yaha ruka hun, tum chinta mat karo..bye”
“tum ab yahin aa jao, kyon yaha vaha rah rahe ho” — ritu ne kaha
“ritu 12 ke baad yahin tumhaare saath hi rahunga, main bhi tumse dur nahin rahna chaahta, tabhi to itni jaldi ki date nikalwaayi hai shaadi ki maine” — maine kaha
“ok ji, jaisa aapko sahi lage, bye apna khyaal rakhna” — ritu ne kaha
maine peeche mud kar dekha, ritu ki aankho mein bahut jyada pyar tha. main vaha se jaana nahi chaahta tha par phir bhi mujhe jaana pada.
Aur phir vo din aa gaya jish din hamaari shaadi huyi.
12 july ko shaadi ka shaam 6 baje ka muhurat tha.
main taiyaar ho kar 5 baje hi ritu ke ghar pahunch gaya.

 

[The Immortal]

Maine bell bajaayi
Darvaaja khula to vaha kishi dushri aurat ko pa kar main chonk gaya. Baad mein pata chala ki vo dipti thi
“Aao jeeja ji, aapka swaagat hai, ritu taiyar ho rahi hai, aao baitho” —- dipti ne kaha
main ander aa gaya.
Ander ghuste hi ek 31-32 saal ke aadmi ne mujh se haath milaaya aur bola, “welcome dear, to aaj aap se mulaakat ho hi gayi”
Baad mein pata chala ki vo manish tha
Main manish aur dipti ko jaanta nahi tha ishliye un se jyada baat nahi ki aur chupchaap ek taraf baith gaya.
Koyi 15 minut baad dipti ne mujhe kaha, “jeeja ji aap ander jao, ritu aapko bula rahi hai”
Main khada huva aur ritu ke bedroom mein ghuss gaya
Ander jo dekha vo unbelievable tha.
Ritu laal saree mein leepti mere saamne khadi thi. bahut jyada pyari lag rahi thi. man kar raha tha ki ushe baahon mein bhar lun
“Dekh kya rahe ho, bataao kaisi lag rahin hun” — ritu ne pucha
“bahut pyari lag rahi ho jaan bas pucho mat” — maine ritu ki aur badhte huve kaha
“mujhe chuna mat….” —- ritu ne kaha
maine ritu ko beech mein hi tok diya aur bola,“haan haan mujhe yaad hai tum mujhe pyar karti ho to ishka matlab ye nahi hai ki main tumhaare sharir se khelunga. Ye mujhe rat gaya hai. main to bas tumhe nazdeek se dekhna chaah raha tha”
“ye saree kaisi lag rahi hai” — ritu ne pucha
“achi lag rahi hai, balki bahut achi lag rahi hai” — maine kaha
“arey ye tumhaari laayi huyi saree hai, pehchaan kyon nahi rahe ho tum” — ritu ne thoda gusse mein kaha
“ohh haan ritu mujhe lag to raha tha par samajh nahi aa raha tha ki ye tumhaare paas kaise aayi, mujhe laga tum bhi vaisi hi saree ley aayi ho” —- maine kaha
“maine tumhaari taxi ka sheesa tod kar nikaal li thi. acha huva time se nikaal li. Baad mein to vo taxi yaha se gaayab hi ho gayi” — ritu ne kaha
“acha kiya ritu, aaj tumne dil ko ek aur khusi de di. Meri laayi huyi saree tumne pahan li aur mujhe kya chaahiye. mujhe to lagta tha ki ye sasti saree hai” — maine kaha
“sasti saree nahi hai ye, bahut keemti hai mere liye. dil se laga kar rakha hai maine ishe. Aur dekho kitni pyari lag rahi hai mujh par. Lag rahin hun na tumhaari dulhan main” —- ritu ne kaha
ritu ki baat shun kar meri aankho mein aanshu bhar aaye. jab itna pyar miley to koyi bhi ro dega.
“Kya huva jatin, ye aankhe kyon bhar aayi hain tumhaari” — ritu ne pucha
“kuch nahi bas khusi ke aanshu hain, tum jaldi taiyaar ho kar baahar aa jao, hum mandir ke liye late ho rahe hain” —– maine kaha aur darvaaje ki aur mud gaya
“ruko to jatin,…….. I love you” —- ritu ne peeche se kaha
maine kaha, “I love you too ritu, jaldi karo hum late ho rahein hain”
“theek hai, bas 10 minut mein aa rahin hun” — ritu ne kaha
ritu ke ghar se koyi nahi aaya. Maine pune se madan ko bhi invite kar liya tha. vo seedha mandir pahunch gaya.
Bahut emotional pal tha vo mere liye jab main ritu ke saath 7 phere ley raha tha. ek ek kadam main bahut bhaavuk ho kar rakh raha tha. ritu khaamosi se chal rahi thi. upar se mandir ka maahol. Bahut peacefull environment mein hamaari shaadi ho rahi thi. bhagvaan ko ye shaadi manjoor thi tabhi bhagvaan ke mandir mein hi unhi ke saamne ye shaadi ho rahi thi.
Jaise hi pura process khatam huva, ritu ne meri aur dekha aur boli, “ab to rahoge na mere saath hamaare ghar mein”
Main bas mushkura diya aur aankhe jhapka kar haan ka ishaara kiya
Tabhi ritu ka mobile baj utha.
Ushne phone uthaaya aur maine dekha ki vo kishi gahri chinta mein kho gayi.
Maine pucha, “kya baat hai ritu”
“Papa tumse baat karna chaahte hain jatin, please chupchaap sab kuch shun lena vo bahut gusse mein hain” —- ritu ne kaha
“theek hai laao phone mujhe do” — maine kaha
maine phone kaan par laga kar hello bola hi tha ki udhar se gusse ki bochaar ho gayi, “meri baat kaan khol kar shun ladke, shaadi to tune ritu se kar li par main tujhe kuch nahi dunga. Ritu ko bhi apni jaaydaad se bedakhal karta hun. tu yaha mere ghar mein ghusne ki himmat mat karna. aur haan ritu ko kuch nukshaan pahunchaaya na to teri boti boti karke kutto ko khila dunga, neech kahin ka”
bas itna kah kar ritu ke papa ne phone kaat diya
“kya kah rahe the papa jatin” — ritu ne pucha
“kuch nahi aashirvaad de rahe the ki tum dono sada khus rahna” — maine kaha
“jhut bol rahe ho…. hain na, ye aashirvaad unhone mujhe bhi diya hai” —– ritu ne kaha
“ritu bado ke muh se nikla har bol aashirvaad hi hai, tum chinta mat karo vakt ke saath sab kuch theek ho jaayega. Jish bhagvaan ne ye rista banaaya hai, vahi bhagvaan ish riste ki laaz bhi rakhega. Chalo ab chalte hain” —- maine kaha
hum chale hi the ki sidharth vaha aa gaya
“congratulation to both of you. Mujhe lag hi raha tha ki tum dono ka gahra pyar hai. all the best. Ritu hamesha khus rahna” — sidharth ne kaha
maine dekha ki ritu ne sidharth se theek se baat nahi ki. kaaran aaj diary padh kar pata chala ki aisa kyon tha.
mandir ghar ke nazdeek hi tha par phir bhi maine ek car arrange kar rakhi thi ghar tak jaane ke liye.
hum dono sabhi ko bye karke car mein baith gaye. Dil mein ajeeb sa mitha mitha ahsaash ho raha tha. main apni dulhan ke saath baitha tha. ritu ne meri aur dekha aur maine ushki aur dekha. Hamnein aankho hi aankho mein apne pyar ka izhaar kiya. Par ritu ke chehre par ek dard bhari mushkaan thi
Koyi 5 minut mein hum ghar pahunch gaye.
Ghar aate hi ritu bedroom mein ghuss gayi aur bed par gir kar rone lagi.
Maine darvaaja khadkaaya to vo jhat se uth gayi aur apne aanshu puchne lagi
Main ushke karib aa gaya. Ritu ki aankhe laal ho rakhi thi
“Kya baat hai ritu, kya mujh se koyi galti huyi hai” — maine pucha
“nahi jatin tumhaari koyi galti nahi hai, papa ne mujhe pehli baar itni buri tarah se daanta hai. aisa lag raha tha ki vo mujhe galat samajh rahe hain. Unhe shaayad lagta hai ki maine ye shaadi apne jism ki aag bhujaane ke liye ki hai. unhone aisa kaha nahi par jaise vo mujhe daant rahe the ush se yahi lag raha tha. unhone ye tak kah diya ki chintoo ko ab bhool jao, main tum paapiyon ke paas ushe nahin bhejunga. Main apne bete se kaise dur rahungi jatin, pata nahi kya hoga. main bahut dukhi hun. I am very sorry jatin, main abhi tumse koyi baat nahi kar paaungi. Mera man tha ki hum mandir se aa kar dher saari baate karenge par mera dil abhi bahut bhaari ho raha hai. please mujhe galat mat samajhna. Main thodi der late rahin hun, tum bhi dushre kamre mein araam kar lo” —- ritu ne bhaavuk ho kar kaha
“theek hai ritu tum araam karo, meri chinta mat karo, main bhi araam kar leta hun” — maine kaha.
Koyi ek ghante baad ritu mere kamre mein aayi.
Main aankhe band karke bistar par leta huva tha.
“Sho rahe ho kya jatin” ritu ne pucha
main jhat se uth gaya aur uth kar baith gaya
meri dulhan aankho mein pyar lekar mere saamne khadi thi.
“nahi jaan bas aankhe band karke leta huva tha. kaisi ho tum” —- maine kaha
“tumhe bahut bura lag raha hoga ki maine tumhe yahaan dushre kamre mein leta diya. jatin mere dil ke zakham abhi hare hain. Mujhe thoda vakt do, main puri koshish karungi ki main ek achi patni ban paaun. Please mujhe galat mat samajhna. Main tumhe bahut pyar karti hun. tum chaaho to mere paas aa jaana, tumhe rokungi nahin. Par mujhe thoda vakt chaahiye ish nayi jeendagi mein adjust hone ke liye. sab kuch itni jaldi ho gaya hai ki main hairaan hun. please mujhe samajhne ki koshish karna” ——- ritu ne emotinal ho kar kaha
“main samajh sakta hun jaan, mere kaaran hi to tumhe zakham mile hain. Tum chinta mat karo. Hum pyar se ek saath rahenge. Rahi baat tumhaare paas aane ki to mujhe koyi jaldi nahi hai. tum ab meri patni ho. Puri jeendagi padi hai paas aane ke liye. tum ab sho jao, tumhaari aankhe laal ho rahi hain” —- maine kaha...

 

[The Immortal]

Aur ish tarah se hamaari shaadi shuda jeendagi ki shuruvaat huyi. Aaj lagbhag ek mahina ho gaya shaadi ko. Hum hanste boltey hain. Ache dost ki tarah ek chhat ke neeche rahte hain. Baith kar ganto baate karte rahte hain. Jab ritu bolti hai to main pyar se ushke chehre ko dekhte huve ushki baat shunta hun. jeendagi bahut pyari aur hasin ban gayi hai. haan ye aur bhi jyada hasin ho sakti hai agar hum dono ek normal husband wife ki tarah rah paayein to. Par mujhe ish baat ka koyi gam nahin hai.
Ritu mera pura dhyaan rakhti hai. ushe bhi apne office jaana hota hai par phir bhi ushe pehle mujhe breakfast dene ki chinta rahti hai. kabhi kabhi khud breakfast karne ka time ushke paas nahi hota par mujhe kheela kar hi office jaati hai. ushki mere prati dedication dekh kar aankhe bhar aati hain.
Kabhi shaam ko vakt hota hai to hum dono gate way of India par ghum aate hai aur khub masti karte hain. Ice-cream khaate khaate hum dur tak nikal jaate hain
Hamaari jeendagi mein sex nahi hai par pyar chaaro aur beekhra pada hai. hum dono apni pyar se bhari duniya mein bahut khus hain.
Aaj ye diary padhi to ye ahsaash aur gahra ho gaya ki kitna bada paap kiya tha maine. Ek maasum se phool ko maine badi berahmi se kuchla tha. sukar hai vo phool aaj meri jeendagi mein hai aur mere paas moka hai ushe phir se kheelne dene ka. Main apni puri koshish karunga ki ab mere kaaran ritu ko koyi bhi dukh ya takleef na ho. Jish pyar se vo mera dhyaan rakhti hai utne hi pyar se main bhi ushka dhyaan rakhunga.
Aaj ye baat samajh mein aa rahi hai ki kyon ritu mujhe ushke sharir ko chune se mana karti hai. jitna julm ushne saha hai, ushki jagah koyi aur hota to mar jaata. Dukh bas ish baat ka hai ki ye sab mere kaaran huva. Man kar raha hai ki ritu ke kadmo mein gir jaaun aur ush se phir ek baar maafi maangu. Par vo uth jaayegi aur mujhe yaha apne paas dekh kar pareshaan hogi. kuch kahegi nahi mujhe, haan man hi man udaas jaroor ho jaayegi aur mujh se sorry feel karegi ki vo mujh se dur dur rahti hai.
Kal ritu ne mujh se bade pyar se pucha tha
“Jatin tum mujh se naraaj honge na”
maine kaha, “kyon aisa kyon kah rahi ho tum ritu”
ritu ki aankhe bhar aayi aur vo rote huve boli, “main tumhaari patni hun aur jab se shaadi huyi hai main roj tum se alag sho rahin hun, main kya karun jatin mujhe kuch samajh nahi aata. Jab bhi tumhe apne paas bulaane ka sochti hun to vahi sab purani baate man mein ghumne lagti hain. Ek andhera maano mujhe gher leta hai. Main tumhaari jeendagi barbaad kar rahin hun.. hai na”
“nahi ritu aisa kyon kah rahi ho, jeendagi to maine tumhaari barbaad ki thi. tumne to mujhe apna kar meri jeendagi par ek ahsaan kiya hai. mujhe jeendagi bhar tumhaare sharir ko chune ka moka na bhi mile mujhe koyi gam nahi hoga. Mujhe aaj bas ye khusi hai ki main tumhaara pati ban ke tumhaare saath hun. mujhe tumse kuch aur nahi chaahiye jaan, tum mujhe itna pyar de rahi ho vo kya kam hai. sex ke liye ye shaadi nahi ki thi maine, pyar ke liye ki thi. hum bas araam se apni ish shaadi shuda jeendagi mein aage badhte hain, jo bhi hoga acha hoga. I love you” —- maine ritu ko samjhaate huve kaha
“lekin phir bhi jatin main bahut dukhi hun ki ek patni ke roop mein main fail ho rahin hun, aisa nahi hai ki main koshish nahi kar rahi hun. bahut koshish kar rahi hun. par meri aatma tak andhera bhara hai. aaj tumhaare liye dil mein nafrat nahi hai phir bhi mera ye sharir ush sab ke liye taiyaar nahi hai jishke liye ek patni ko hona chaahiye. upar se mere papa ki daant ne mujhe aur jyada ashaaye bana diya hai” — ritu ne kaha
“to zemmedaar kaun hai ish sab ke liye. main hi to zemmedaar hun na, main tumhaari haalat nahi samjhunga to aur kaun samjhega. Tum jabardasti kuch koshish mat karo. Hamaari kishmat mein ek hasin husband wife ka rista raha to vo jaroor aayega. ye pyar sex se kahin jyada kimti hai jaan, kishi baat ki chinta mat karo aur sho jao” —- maine kaha
ish tarah badi mushkil se kal maine ritu ko samjha bujha kar shulaaya tha.

 

[The Immortal]

ritu mere saamne padi hai aur main ushke saamne baitha huva ye diary leekh raha hun. par ab tak maine ya to ushke chehre ko dekha hai ya phir ushke kadmo ko. Ushke sharir ka koyi aur ang mujhe jaise deekhaayi nahi de raha hai. ish pyar ne mere ander ki havash ko khatam karke rakh diya hai. main bas ritu ko ek baar gale laga kar pyar se kahna chaahta hun, “ritu maine tumhaare har dukh ko mahsush kiya hai. tumhaare sabhi dukho ke liye main zemmedaar hun. mujhe jo saja deni ho de do par ish dukh ko jald se jald bhula do. Hasin pyar ki ek hasin jeendagi hamaara intezaar kar rahi hai. maine hi tumhe ye dukh diye hain ab main hi tumhe ek hasin safar par ley jaana chaahta hun. please mere saath chalo”
Date : 22-08-09
Kal jo huva ushki mahak abhi tak feeza mein faili huyi hai. charo aur rang beerange phool khil aaye hain. Meri aur ritu ki jeendagi ko jaise pankh lag gayein hain. Hum dono bahut unche ud rahein hain. Abhi tak kal ka ahsaash baaki hai. bahut dardnaak vakt tha kal hum dono ke liye par ushke ahsaash bahut pyare the.
Kal main apna mobile ghar hi bhool gaya. Shaam ko call center mein kaafi busy tha. main koyi 12 baje free huva. Mein ritu ko inform bhi nahi kar paaya ki aane mein thodi der ho jaayegi.
Maine raat ke 12 baje ghar ki bell bajaayi
Ritu ne darvaaja khola. Ushke chehre par chinta aur pareshaani saaf deekhaayi de rahi thi.
Maine darvaaja band kiya aur pucha, “kaisi ho jaan”
Ritu mere gale lag gayi aur rote huve boli, “kahan rah gaye the tum, mujhe bahut chinta ho rahi thi, phone bhi nahi kiya tumne”
“ritu tum mere gale lag kar khadi huyi ho. Tumhe pyar karne ka ye matlab nahin hai ki tum mere sharir se khelogi, chalo hato” —- maine hanste huve kaha
ritu hat gayi aur boli, “sorry galti ho gayi, par tum kya ek phone nahi kar sakte the, mujhe apni jaan kahte ho par tumhe meri koyi chinta nahi hai”
“sorry jaan bahut busy tha, dhyaan hi nahi raha ki kab 12 baj gaye, please mujhe maaf kar do” —- maine ritu ke kandhe ki aur haath badha kar kaha
par vo peeche hat gayi aur boli, “chalo haath dho lo main khaana lagaati hun”
ritu kitchen mein chali gayi. bahut naraaj lag rahi thi. jab aapka pyar naraaj ho to kuch acha nahi lagta. Maine pehli baar ushe aise naraaj hote huve dekha tha.
ritu kitchen mein mere liye khaana garam kar rahi thi.
mujhe kuch samajh nahi aa raha tha ki kaise manaaun main ritu ko. Mein kitchen ke door mein khada khada ritu ko dekhta raha. ushke najdeek jaane ki himmat nahi ho rahi thi
par phir bhi mujh se raha nahi gaya aur maine ritu ko peeche se baahon mein bhar liya aur kaha, “sorry jaan aage se aisa nahi hoga. Aage se kabhi late huva to turant tumhe phone karke bataaunga, please mujhe maaf kar do”
“tumhaari marji hai jatin, mujhe to bas tumhaari chinta ho rahi thi. bure bure khyaal aa rahe the ki pata nahin tum kahan rah gaye” —- ritu ne kaha
ajeeb baat thi ritu ne mujhe hatne ko nahi kaha. Maine phir meri jaan ko bahut ache se apni baahon mein daboch liya
maine kaha, “ritu main tumhe baahon mein bhar kar khada hun, tum mujhe daant kar hata kyon nahi rahi ho, mujhe daant kar vahi dialogue bolo na sharir se khelne wala…. please”
“tum mere pati ho, ab kya ye bhi bataana padega tumhe, main chaahe chaahun ya na chaahun tum mere saath kuch bhi kar sakte ho, tumhaara mujh par pura adhikaar hai” — ritu ne kaha
main turant hat gaya aur bola, “tumhaari marji ke bina main kabhi kuch nahi karunga jaan, apne pyar ko main kabhi dukh nahi dunga”
ritu ghum kar mere gale lag gayi aur boli, “jatin I love you…. mujhe aise mat sataaya karo. Pata hai dil bahut bhaari ho raha tha. ek phone bhi nahi kar sake tum. Itna busy koyi nahi hota, main 6 baje se aankhe beechaaye baithi hun. ek ek minut bahut mushkil se beeta hai mera”
shaadi ke baad pehli baar hum aise gale lag kar khade the. Vakt maano tahar gaya tha. mujhe bahut acha lag raha tha khud ko ritu ke itne karib paa kar. Mujhe ye ahsaash ho raha tha ki shaayad ritu ab ush safar par chalne ke liye taiyaar hai jo ki ek pati, patni ka hota hai.
maine ritu ke chehre ko apne haatho mein thaam liya
ushne apni aankhe band kar li.
Maine aage badh kar ritu ke honto par apne hont tika diye.
aur phir mere aur ritu ke honto ke beech vo kiss huyi jishki maine sapne mein bhi kalpana nahi ki thi.
hamaare hont kya jude, aisa lag raha tha jaise ki hum dono ki aatma jud gayi ho aur jud kar ek ho gayi ho. Bahut pyara ahsaash ho raha tha mujhe ritu ko kiss karte huve. Jish tarah main ritu ke honto ko apne honto mein dabaata tha ushi tarah ritu bhi mere honto ko apne honto mein dabaane ki koshish karti thi. mere honto ki har ek movement ka jawaab ritu apne honto ki similar movement se de rahi thi. Koyi 15 minut hum yu hi kitchen mein khade khade ek dushre ko betahaasa kiss karte rahe. Hamaari saanse bhi tej tej chalne lagi thi.
Aisi kiss ke baad mujhe bilkul vishwaas ho gaya ki ek aadmi aur aurat ke beech kiss pyar ka izhaar karne ka sabse pyara tareeka hai. ek dushre ko kiss karte karte main aur ritu pyar ki ush gahraayi tak pahunch gaye jishki hamne kalpana bhi nahi ki thi.
Jish tarah hum ek dushre ko kiss kar rahe the, ush se aisa lag raha tha ki hum ek dushre ke liye janmo se pyase hain.
Ritu achaanak hat gayi aur boli, “chalo khaana kha lo, tumhe bhook lagi hogi”
“Nahin aaj bhook nahin hai” — maine kaha aur kah kar phir se ritu ke honto ko apne honto mein daba liya.
hum phir se ush pyari si kiss mein kho gaye. Mere liye khud ko sambhaalna mushkil ho raha tha.
maine ritu ko apni godi mein utha liya aur ushke bedroom ki taraf chal pada
“jatin ye kya kar rahe ho, khaana thanda ho raha hai” — ritu ne kaha
“ho jaane do thanda, aaj hamaari suhaagraat hai jaan, bhul jao sab kuch aur ish pal mein kho jao” —- maine kaha
ritu ne aankhe band kar li
maine ritu ko bedroom mein la kar pyar se bed par leta diya.
maine ushke chehre par sikan dekhi. Shaayad vo phir se kuch bura mahsush kar rahi thi.
mujh se dekha nahi gaya aur maine kaha, “chalo ritu khaana khaate hain”
“nahin jatin please mujhe chhod kar mat jao, mujhe baahon mein bhar lo please” —- ritu ne rote huve kaha.
Main bahut bhaavuk ho gaya aur ushe apni baahon mein bhar liya.
“Kya baat hai jaan ro kyon rahi ho main tumhaare paas hi to hun” —- maine kaha
“Jatin jab bhagvaan ko hamaare dil mein ye pyar ka phool hi khilaana tha to hamein itne lambe raste se kyon ghumaaya ki hum ghum ghum kar thak jaayein, aur ish pyar ke phool ki khusbu tak ko mahsush na kar paayein” —- ritu ne pucha
“pata nahi ritu, hum dono ish vishaal duniya ke aage bahut chhote hain. Hamein bas itna pata hai ki hamein pyar hai. puri kahaani to bas bhagvaan hi jaante hain. Kya pata hamaara janmo ka rista ho. Ish janam mein galti se tum sanjay ki patni ban gayi aur phir bhagvaan ne ish galti ko sudhaar diya. kuch bhi ho sakta hai jaan. Ye duniya bahut anokhi hai aur rahashyon se bhari hai. hum jaante hi kitna hain ish duniya ko” — maine kaha
itne pyar mein jab pati patni ek dushre ke gale lage hon to unke beech ek khubsurat sex ki sambhaavna ban jaati hai. aisa hi kuch mere aur ritu ke beech ho raha tha.
pati hone ke naate mujhe ek koshish karne ki jaroorat thi. par mujhe bas ritu ka dar tha. main ushe koyi dukh nahi dena chaahta tha. vo bahut emotional ho kar mujh se leepti huyi thi. main ush ke itne karib hone ke kaaran bahakta ja raha tha.

 

[The Immortal]

aur phir bina soche samjhe maine ek koshish ki. vaise bhi pyar soch samajh kar nahi hota.
maine ritu ke ubhaaro ko thaam liya aur unhe pyar se dabaate huve kaha, “jaan tumhe pyar kar raha hun, jab bhi kuch bura lage to mujhe rok dena, main turant ruk jaaunga”
ritu ne kuch nahi kaha aur apni aankhe band kar li
thodi der tak main ritu ke ubhaaro ko pyar se masalta raha
maine ritu ke chehre ko dhyaan se dekha to paaya ki vo shaanti se aankhe band karke ush pal mein khone ki koshish kar rahi hai. vo koshish hi kar rahi thi kyonki kabhi ushke chehre par sikan hoti thi aur kabhi shaanti. Vo kishi kasam-kash mein deekh rahi thi.
maine bahut pyar se dheere se ritu ki kameez ko upar sarka kar ushke ubhaaro ko thaam liya.
ritu ne bra nahi pahni thi. shaayad raat ko shote vakt vo nahi pahanti hogi. mujhe apni patni ke baare mein pata hi kitna hai.
maine ritu ke ek nipple ko muh mein ley liya aur pyar se choosne laga.
maine nazre utha kar ritu ke chehre ko dekha. Kuch clear nahi ho raha tha ki ushe kaisa lag raha hai.
maine pucha, “ jaan kya main hat jaaun”
“nahin jatin aaj mujhe ye sab face karna hi hoga, varna mai kabhi nahi kar paaungi. Main tumhaari patni hun. tum meri parvaah kiye bina jo man mein aaye karo” — ritu ne kaha
“ye kya kah rahi ho jaan, aisa nahi kar sakta main jaan, chalo kishi aur din try karenge” —- maine kaha
“tum jab mere ubhaaro ko chum rahe the to tumhaare man mein kya tha jatin, havash ya pyar” —– ritu ne pucha
“pyar tha jaan, havash ko to main kab ka tyag chuka hun” —- maine kaha
“to phir ye pyar jaari rakho jatin, tumhaara pyar hi mere un ghaavo ko bhar sakta hai jo tumhaari havash ne kabhi mere sharir ko diye the. Aaj mujhe tumhaari patni hone ka vo ahsaash de do jo har patni ka sapna hota hai. mujhe pyar karo jatin….bas pyar karo” —- ritu ne kaha
maine ritu ke dushre nipple ko honto mein daba liya aur ushe betahasa choosne laga.
par phir bhi ritu ke chehre ke bhaav yahi jatla rahe the ki vo kishi conflict mein hai
maine ritu ki kameez utaar kar ek taraf rakh di aur ushke dono ubhaaro ko thaam kar pyar se masalne laga.
par ritu jaise ek laash ki tarah mere neeche padi thi. ye soch kar meri aankhe bhar aayi ki hey bhagvaan kya haal kar diya hai maine apni jaan ka. mujh se ye sab dekha nahi gaya aur maine ritu ke kadmo ko thaam kar kaha, “jaan mujhe maaf kar do, mujhe tumse kuch nahi chaahiye”
maine ritu ko dekha to vo bhi ro rahi thi.
main uth kar ushke chehre ke paas aaya aur ushke aanshu punch kar bola, “koyi jaroorat nahi hai ye sab karne ki hamein jaan, hamaara pyar kaafi hai hum dono ke liye”
“I am sorry jatin, main ish liye kah rahi thi ki mujhe ek moka do, main ek jeenda laash ban chuki hun” —- ritu ne rote huve kaha
“bas jaan please… aisi baate mat karo varna main mar jaaunga. Tumhaari ish haalat ke liye main hi zemmedar hun” —- maine kaha
“nahin jatin, tum hi nahi, main khud bhi zemmedar hun. pehle to jo huva so huva, par mera jo ** karne ki koshis ki gayi aur mujhe jish tarah baar baar jalil kiya gaya ushne to mujhe pura khatam kar diya hai. I am very sorry jatin tumhe pyar to karti hun par tumhe kuch dene ke liye mere paas nahi hai,varna to jish din shaadi huyi thi ushi raat khud ko tumhaare kadmo mein beecha deti main. Ishliye tumhe kahti thi ki mujhe moka dena, mein patni ka farz nibhaane ki koshish karungi.” — ritu ne rote huve kaha
“bas ritu, please meri jaan logi kya ab” —- maine kaha
main ritu ke saath bed par late gaya aur ushe baahon mein bhar liya. bahut der tak hum chupchaap pade rahe aur kuch nahi bole. Kab hamein neend aa gayi pata hi nahi chala. Jab meri aankh khuli to paaya ki subah ke 4 baj rahein hain. Kamre ki light jali huyi thi. Ritu mere saath hi paanv sikod kar lati huyi thi. bahut pyara ahsaash tha vo mere liye. hum shaadi ke baad pehli baar ek saath sho rahe the aur hamein ye pata bhi nahi tha.
ritu ka muh meri taraf hi tha. vo sirf salwaar mein thi. ushke ubhaar meri aankho ke biklul saamne the. Vo bilkul ek maasum bache ki tarah sho rahi thi.
maine ritu ko baahon mein bhar liya aur vo hadbada kar uth gayi.
“ohh…. tumne mujhe dara diya” — ritu ne kaha
“tum bahut pyar se sho rahi thi, raha nahi gaya aur tumhe baahon mein bhar liya, I love you jaan” —– maine kaha
“I love you too jatin, kya time huva hai” —- ritu ne pucha
“pure 4 baje hain jaan, kab neend aa gayi pata hi nahi chala. Hum ek saath sho rahe the aur hamein ish baat ka ahsaash bhi nahi tha. tumhe kaisa lag raha hai jaan” —- maine pucha
“acha lag raha hai jatin, vo kaun si patni hogi jo apne pati ke saath sho kar khud ko khusnasib nahi samjhegi” —- ritu ne kaha
aur hum phir se gale lag kar sho gaye.