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Fantasy Saurya - ek youdha (Completed)

Kya mujhe mere likhne ka tarika change karna chahiye

  • nahi aise hi sahi hai

    Votes: 130 91.5%
  • haa (to comment kr mujhe advice d)

    Votes: 12 8.5%

  • Total voters
    142

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Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds
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Hi friend maine xforum pr kafi stories padi hai aur ab mai bhi apni ek story post karne ja raha hu ab jyada wakt na lete huye
story p chalte h jaise jaise log milte rahenge unke bare m batata jaunga .
so lets go


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King

𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕺𝖓𝖊 & 𝕺𝖓𝖑𝖞 𝕿𝖗𝖚𝖊 𝕶𝖎𝖓𝖌
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Waiting
 

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UPDATE - 99

Ab tak

To humne Villain ji ke darshan kar liye the saath hi uski mansa bhi jaani thi...Sath hi...Time shield ka nirman hona aur bhi kuch ghatnaye dekhi thi....

Ab aage...

To jaise humne dekha tha apna Hero chala gaya tha Earth pe to hum bhi wahi chalenge....

Saurya yaani main abhi R.G ke aasram mein khada tha ji haa wahi aashram jaha Deep aur Shuhani behosh pade the...

Main- Chalo wo waqt aa hi gaya....mujhe pura bharosha hai ki iss baar sab sahi hi hoga...

Itna bol main aage badha aur uss aashram mein chala gaya...

Aasham mein meri mulakat hui R.G yaani Rishi Gautam se...unko maine sab kuch bataya.....apna saara plan saath hi usme unka kya role hoga...

Main- To aap taiyaar ho...

R.G - Samrath main puri tarah se taiyaar hu...apke iss kaam mein saath dene ko....par...

Main- Par kya R.G apko mere plan mein koi kammi nazar aa rahi hai kya...

R.G- Kammi....nahi nahi aisa nahi hai bas ye pahli baar hone wala hai to thodi si chinta hai maan mein baaki kuch nahi...aap jaaye main apke Mata Pita ko le aaunga waha uss gaon mein....nirdharit samay pe...

Fir hamari kuch au bhi baatein hui aur main waha se chala aaya....

Ab baari thi meri Raniyon se baat karne ki unko samjhane ki ke kya karna hai....

Plan simple sa tha mera ki R.G Maa Papa ko lekar aayenge aur ye pancho milker Manjulika ko kisi jagah pe pakad ke rakhegi apni powers se aur main waha aaunga Jwala ke saath aur uske powers matlab wo pavitra agni ki madad se Manjulika aur Maa dono ko ek karr dunga....par yaha par ek dikkat thi...aur wo ye ki Manjulika ki body ko kamjor karna jo bahut hi muskil tha...par mujhe lagta hai ye pancho wo kaam kar lengi...

Main plan ke baae mein sochta hua uss RAW wale flat mein chala gaya aur waha jaa kar unn sab ko bulaya...wo sab bhi aa gayi kuch der mein...

Maine apna plan unko samjhaya...

Shilpa- Isme koi khatra to nahi hai naa.....

Main- Nahi tumhe kuch bhi nahi hoga....

Shilpa- Main apni nahi Shuhani ki baat kar rahi hu...aisa kuch bhi pahhle kabhi nahi hua hai...

Main- Hmm pata hai par yahi ek rasta hai aur yakkin karo kisi ko kuch nahi hoga....

Sabne haa mein saar hilaya....hum sab baatein karne lage detail mein plan ke baare mein....

Jyada der nahi hui baatein karte ki mujhe Margret ki aawaj sunnayi di....

Margret- Bansoa khali ho chuka hai hum sab bhi nikalne wale hai....

Main- Haa thik hai...par wo taikhana jaise hai waise hi rahne dene ko bolo tum sab yaha aa jao...

Margret- Thik hai hum bas nikal hi rahe hai...

uske baad aawaj aani band ho gayi...

Sabko maine ye baat bata di...

Abhi hum kuch aur bolte ki Alex ki aawaj aayi mujhe....

Alex- Ye Dristi waha aayi hai kya....

Main- Nahi to wo yaha nahi aayi hai...kya baat hai...

Alex- Arre abhi yahi thi wo mere saath khel rahi thi acchanak se wo ek portal khol usme chali gayi....mujhe laga tumhare paas gayi hogi...

Main- Nahi aisa to nahi hai....main bhi usk.....

Baat puri hoti usse pahle Dristi Kiran aur Pradeep dono ko lekar mere pass pahuch gayi thi....aur unn dono ke chahre ko dekh saaf pata chal raha tha ki unko yaha Dristi acchanak se le aayi hai..

Main- Haa wo yahi hai Alex abhi aayi hai tum bhi aa jao...

Pradeep- Yaar ye kya hai ye to humme kahi se bhi utha laati hai...

Main-Ab isme main kya bolu...ye sabke saath yahi karti hai...

Dristi udte hue mere pass aayi aur mere goad mein aaa gayi...

Main- Aur badmash inhe kyun laayi hai yaha ab....

Mera itna bolna tha ki dimmag mein pictures chalne lage jisme....Pradeep Mom se mil raha tha saath hi aur bhi bahut saari tasweerien family drama ke saath...

Main- ye sab kya hai..tum chahti ho main ye sab naa hone du...

Mere aisa bolne pe wo rone lagi matlab main galat tha...

Main- Arre arre accha to tum chahti ho ye sab karwa du...

Iss baar uske chahre pe khushi thi...samajh mein aa gaya muijhe kya baat hai....

Maine phone nikala aur call lagaya Mohit mamu ko...

Mohit- Kya bhanje kaha hai tu...

Main- Mama ek bahut badi baat pata chali hai mujhe...

Mohit- Kya...

Main- Pradeep jinda hai....aur wo badi maaasi ke saath rahta hai...

Mohit mama ek baar to chup hi ho gaye koi bhi ho jaata....

Main- Mamu mamu...

Mohit- Tu sach bol raha hai naa....

Main - Haa mamu sach bol raha hu...

Mohit- Main abhi Sanjna didi ko batata hu...

Call cut...

Main - Chalo ye kaam ho gaya....

Ye baat khatam bhi nahi hui thi meri ki fir se kuch tasveerein aa gayi jisko dekh main shocked rah gaya...

Itne mein waha Alex aa gaya...

Alex ke aate hi Dristi uske paas chali gayi...

Alex- Kya hua Saurya sab theek to hai naa....

Main - Nahi kuch bhi theek nahi hai jo karna hai jaldi karna hoga......ye Maarcuss jald hi aazad hone wala hai aur uske jariye wo yaha aa sakta hai....humara time shield bekar ho jaayega....

Shilpa- Nahi aisa nahi hoga hum uss Marcuss ko dekh lenge....

Main- Hmm par ek bhi galti bahut bhai pad sakti hai...chalo ab sab jaao humme bahut kuch karna hai....

Maine sabko waha se bhej diya....Ab main akela tha aur sochne laga tasveeron ke baare mein ki phone baja mera...

Call Mom ka tha....

Main- Haa Mom

Sanjna-(rote hue) Beta kaha hai tu....yaha aa jaa jaldi tera tera bhai aaya hai...

Mujhe pata tha ye sab par ab bata to sakta nahi to...

Main- Kiski baat kar rahi ho aap Mom

Mom- Pradeep wo mere pass hai abhi wo teri badi maasi ke saath rahta tha aur humme pata nahi tha...tu aa jaa yaha sab tujhse milna chahte hai...

Main- Aapne sabko mere baare mein bata diya...

Mom- Haa sab kuch...chal ab jaldi se aa

Main- Hmm thik hai main aa raha hu...

Call cut...

Main- Kappa ye sab kaise ho sakta hai....

Kappa- Ye marcuss pahle bhi time ko control karne ke pichhe pada tha issbaa bhi wo aisa kuch karega hi jiske jariye wo yaha aa jaayega....

Main - Ab ye khatam Marcuss ki maut se hi hoga naa...

Kappa- Haa

Main - hmm samajh gaya....

Main bhi taiyaa hua aur chal diya mom ke pass jaane ko....

Jab waha pahucha to pahle se hi log the waha sabhi log saare maasi mausa sab aur saath hi bua aur fufa bhi pahle to sabne Pradeep ko ghere rakha tha wahi jaise hi main pahucha mere saath bhi wahi hua....

Kuch der ka wahi family drama hua sabko sabki kahaniyan sunayi gayi....Issi bich pata nahi iss Pradeep ko kya shujha usne Kiran ke baare mein sabko bata diya...

Badi massi- Arre mujhe to nahi bataya kabhi...

Pradeep- Wo Main wo batane wala tha...

Poonam maasi- Waah didi bete ke saath bahu free...sahi scheme hai ye...

Unki iss baat pe sab ek baar unko ghurne lage...

Poonam- Arre main to bas....

issi baat pe sab hasne lage....

Aise hi waqt gujra aur tay ye hua ki kal hi Kiran ko bulaya jaayega...

Fir kya tha sabne khana khaya aur fir soone ke liye nikal gaye....insab mein Paridhi aur Shilpa jyada khush the kyunki main wahi rahne wala tha aaj..

Abhi main mere diye hue room mein pahucha hi tha ki Margret ki awaj aayi...

Margret- Hum aa chuke hai...

Main room ke ander gaya gate lock kiya portal khola aur sidha pahuch gaya unsab ke pass jaha....Headmaster,Sangeeta,Rita,Henry aur Margret the....unme se jinko jinko sab yaad aa gaya tha wo to normal the par baaki ke nahi...

Waha pahuchte hi maine fir se ek portal khola aur unn sab ko use hote hue le gaya uss RAW ke diye hue flat mein...

Main- Aaj to yahi rah lo kal koi aur bandobast karta hu...

Sab maan gaye...maine bhi unke khane pinne ka intezam kiya aur waha se nikal aaya wapas....

Wapas aate hi main dhyaan mein baith gaya...

Aaj ke liye itna hi agle update mein dekhte hai Kiran ka family se milna aur saath mein bade Dada aur bade Nana ka aana saher mein aur apne bhaiyon se milna....saath hi bhut kuch aur....
 

Ristrcted

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UPDATE -100

Ab tak

Margret and team aa chuki thi Earth pe wahi Jwala bhi apna kaam kar raha tha...


Ab aage

Subah kaa waqt tha main utha aur morning exercise aur practise karne laga mere saath hi baaki sab bhi aa gaye the...aur wo bhi apna apna kaam karne lage..

Yahi koi 10 baje honge Pradeep le aaya Kiran ko sabse milane ke liye...Kiran ko dekh kar Digvijay Fufa bilkul shocked rah gaye wo iss liye kyunki wo unhi ki student thi...par unhone kuch bola nahi...

Kiran ko sabse milwaya gaya aur sabne usko pasand bhi kar liya....ye Pradeep pahle se hi sab taiyaari kar ke aaya aisi patti padhayi usne sabko ki baat uske aur Kiran ke shagayi tak pahuch gayi aur uss kameene ne to pandit tak book kar liya tha main dekhta raha aur dono ki shagayi bhi ho gayi...iske liye baatein bhi badi acchi kahi thi usne ki uske sabhi apne to wahi pe hai aur Kiran ka koi hai nahi (uska bhai tha par usko maar diya tha Pankaj ke gang ne) aur unn dono ko hi bhidbhad mein dikhawa karna pasand nahi.....ye to accha hua ki Mom ne bas sagayi tak ka hi kaha warna ye dono to shadi karne ki soch rahe the sayad aaj hi....

Ek taraf ye khusiyan thi to wahi dusri taraf puccho maat kya natak chal raha tha...Bade Dada aur Bade Nana Gaon se bahut se logo ko lekar pahuch gaye the apne bhaiyon ke ghar mein...Ab iss baat ko kya kahu samajh mein nahi aa raha...matlab ki isko kidnapping bolna sahi hoga yaa nahi yahi samajh mein nahi aa raha tha...wo sab log un dono ke ghar mein gaye aur jo bhi mard dikhe unko bandh kar apne sath le gaye aur jo mard ghar pe nahi the unko bahar se utha liya.....unn dono gharo mein to bawal maccha hua tha...ye sab karwane ke baad dono ne enrty maari ghar mein aur bol diya sabhi mard gaon mein hai aur tum sab ko bhi chalna hai jaldi se taiyaar ho jaao jaruri saman lo aur chalo hamare saath....Dono jagah pe logo ne thoda virodh jatane ka socha magar Nani aur Dadi ne unko rok diya...unko pata tha ki kya hoga...

Karib 3 baje ke aas pass sabhi pahuch gaye the gaon mein....sabhi gents ko gaon ke ek ghar mein band kar diya gaya tha wahi ladies ko ijjat ke saath unke gharon mein yaani bade Dada aur bade Nana ke gharo mein le jaya gaya waha unka acche se swagat hua..inn sab mein Mohini Puja aur Priya bhi the jinko maine pahle hi bata diya tha ki koi bhi gadbad naa kare...

Unn tinno ne bhi kuch nahi kiya bas aam logo ki tarah waha se gharon mein chali gayi...

Wahi sabko fir sabkuch bataya gaya ki raat ke waqt nahi nikalna hai aur bhi jaruri baatein....wahi Dada aur Nana ko bola gaya ki kal ke panchayat unke hi kiye gaye kaamo ke liye hai....

Sham hui aur sab gharon mein band ho gaye....

Chaliye ab yaha to kuch milna nahi hai to hum chalte hai wapas Hero ke pass

Saurya iss waqt Margret aur baaki sab ke pass gaya hua tha unko bhi ab apne plan ka bata raha tha...ye plan tha Maarcuss ko marne ka plan jo Manjulika aur Shuhani ke body ko ek karne ke turant baad shuru karni thi...

Iss plan mein sabka alag alag role tha...jo aaage pata chalega...

Plan discuss karne ke baad main waha se nikla aur chal diya Niharika ke planet pe kyunki waha bhi unlogo se baat karni thi....waha pahucha to alag hi kuch chal raha tha pata nahi ye kya tha...Pihu aur Dristi dono bilkul ek jaisi dikh rahi thi aisa nahi tha ki Pihu badal gayi thi balki Ye Dristi apna roop badalne lagi thi wo Pihu ke jitni badi ho gayi thi aur uski tarah h dikh rahi thi jab uski nazar mere pe padi to mere jaisa roop le liya...main shocked tha...

Varsha- Aaj hi sheekha hai isne ye.....ye sab kuch bahut jaldi sheekh jaati hai...

Main- Par abhi se....

Alex- Arre main aur Varsha baatein kar rahe the ki kaise maine usko roop badalna shikhaya aur ye sun rahi thi sab aur sheekh gayi sab kuch....ab dekho iska tamasha bolna bhi nahi aata magar rup badalyi fir rahi hai....

Main uski ye baat sun ke hasne laga...

Main- Accha ye chodo tum sab chalo mere saath kuch baatein karni hai....Dristi iss baar koi shaitani nahi.,..

Wo apne asli rooop mein aa gayi aur mere goad mein chali aayi hum sab fir mahel mein chalegaye jaha Kaal sarp ko bhi bulaya gaya...

Main- Wo Maarcuss ke jariye aane ka soch raha hai iss waqt mei.....

Kaal sarp - Haa ye to hona hi tha....maine pahle kyun nahi socha ye Maarcus pahle bhi time ko control karne ki koshish kar chuka hai aur wo iss baar bhi karega hi....jisse ek loop hole ban jaayega jisse hote hue wo yaha aa sakta hai par humme rokna hoga usko...

Main- Hmm mujhe bhi pata chala ye aur issi ko lekar baat karni hai...humme jaise hi Maarcuss kaid se bahar niklega humme usko khatam karna hoga...

Kaal sarp - Nahi usse pahle humme kuchaur karna hoga....

Main- Kya....

Kaal sarp- Jordon ko aazad....Niharika ko Bansoa se wo anguti laani hogi...uss golle ke ander se jisme Jordon band hai....

Main- uska intezam ho chuka hai wo Earth pe hai...aur usko bhi ussi waqt toda jaayega jab hum Maarcuss ko khatam karenge....

Meri iss baat ko sun kar wo dono shant ho gaye...

Main - Ab sab sahi hai naa...

Sabne haa bola aur ye meeting khatam hui...

Main bhi chal diya iske baad ghar ki oor matlab Earth pe...

Waha pahucha Raat ka khana khaya aur baaki sab kaam karke sone ko room mein chala gaya par soya nahi main Dhyaan mein baith gya

Aaj ka itna hi rakhte hai.....Agle update mein hum dekhenge panchayat ka nirnay aur fir Bakki ke sabhi ka bhi gaon jaana aur kuch scenes .......pahle socha tha issi update ko last update banate hai par wo bahut badaho jaayega...isliye next update second last update hoga...
 

Ristrcted

Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds
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Yr update to kal raat hi aane wala tha or abi tak nahi aaya writer bhai jb update na dena ho to km se km readers ko bolke ummid to mt diya kro
daal to kal raat ko hi diya tha dost par ye aaya hi nahi net problem ki wajah se sayad wapas se daal diya hai
 
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Ristrcted

Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds
Staff member
Moderator
41,576
36,855
304
Ristrcted Bhai update Kaha hai
kal daal ke main soo gaya par yaha aaya hi nahi net problem ki wajah se sayad wapas daal diya dost
 
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