★☆★ Xforum | Ultimate Story Contest 2019 ~ Reviews Thread ★☆★

[Chutiyadr]

REVIEW

STORY - KALA BHENSA ....

WRITER- Lovegaand

LINK – https://xforum.live/threads/★☆★-xfo...2019-entry-thread-★☆★.6804/page-4#post-721443

PLOT – main bina khuch kahe writer ke effort ke liye unhe dhanywad dena chahunga …





NOTE FOR WRITER – dost aape jo takt lagi hai story likhne ke liye uske liye apko badhaiya ….

Best of luck for contest….

 

[Casinar]

Story = mera hero
Written by Casinar

Aap ko kya review du main aap to apne aap me pillar ho forum ke, story koi bhi likhe aap aapke followers apne aap uske pichhe aa jayenge...lekin aapne bahut sundar tarike se ye story likhi hai..bhavnao se bharpur lekin aapki ye kahani winner banne ke liye likhi huyi nahi lagti hai mujhe , aisa laga ki aapne kisi ka man rakhne ke liye likhi hai ye story.

Plot thoda sa purana laga mujhe lekin aapki jo language pe command hai aur aapka writing style usne esko behtar bana diya aapne agar kuchh naye concept liye hote to aag laga dete contest me. koi na agle contest me bhi aapki story ka wait rahega.
Best of luck for contest kuchh galat likh diya ho to maaf kar dijiyega

Thanks very much Dev bhai.
Sahi kaha aap ne, main ne khud keh diya hai cc thread par ke iss baar meri kahani winner banne ke liye nahin likhi hai. Valentine ke last contest mein likhe the sach mein competition k liye. Magar plot purani lagi aap ko? Mujhe to nahin laga ke purani hai, main ne nahin padhi kabhi kahani iss plot par.
Anyway bahot shukriya bhai review k liye.

 

[Casinar]

Story = mera hero
Written by Casinar

Pehli baat toh casi bhai ne apni Hinglish pe kaafi homework kiya hai ye unki is story se hi jalakta hai, Hinglish story me vo thori bahut galtiya kar dete the but isme kaafi deep kaam kiya hai unhone specially last me satish ki vo conversation jisme vo ek tapori language me priya se baat karta hai, gazab, hairan kar dene wala part tha vo ab aate hai story pe, hero vese bhi koi six pack abbs wala nahi hota, ladkiyo ko hamesha pyar or care karne wale ladke jyada pasand aate hai, or isme priya ko bhi vesi hi feeling aayi satish ke pyar or care ko lekar, lekin satish bhi majboor tha, story last me thori emotional ho jaati hai, overall story, language sab mast tha maja aa gya casi bhai story pad ke

Bahot shukriya seducer bhai
Iss pyari review k liye.

 

[Casinar]

Review for The Devil Who Destroyed My Life
By Casinar

First of all thank you casi sir for this wonderful story .
Story plot is great , narration .
Apki lekhniy ko review krna hamare Jaise new borns ke liye ghustakhi hai , isliye pehle hi maafi mang Raha Hu .
Story hai housewife ki jiska pati addicted ho jata drugs Ka , Uske baad wo kitna bardast Karti hai , uska ignore Karna , cheejo Ka bechna , chhillana , but still she loves him very much , I like this part of story very much . Kaise wo Usko drugs chhudwane ke liye rehabilitation center le jati hai or wapis pa Bhi leti hai but wo fir se drugs addicted ho jata hai .
I like the character of her mother in law , kind , loving , careful .
Is story Ka best part mujhe iski ending lagi and Avinash ki mom ke last words.
Story bilkul simple hai but sabdo Mai bohat gehrai hai . Sab kuch Aisa laga Jaise koi movie chal rhi hai .
Once again thank you for this wonderful story .
Best of luck for the contest

Thanks very much Immo bro for the lovely review and appreciation.
Happy to note that the story pleased you.

 

[Chutiyadr]

REVIEW

STORY - Mamta ki ek murat - MAA

WRITER- zopion

LINK – https://xforum.live/threads/★☆★-xfo...2019-entry-thread-★☆★.6804/page-5#post-746524

PLOT – mamta ki ek murat maa….maa ke karn hi to ham is ahsas ko mamta kahte hai…

Story ka plot bahut bar suna aur pada gaya plot hai lekin fir bhi har bar kuch na kuch naya to mil hi jata hai ,asal me story telling plot ko cover kar deti hai ..yanha mujhe narration ki thodi dikkat lagi,purane plot ke uper ager nayi story likhni ho to narration tagdi honi chahiye tabhi thoda maja aata hai,jaise ynha notbook ne kamal kiya hai ,purani love story utha kar ...

Yanha bhi writer ne bhut mehnat ki hai likhne me isliye unhe badhaiya ..



NOTE FOR WRITER – zopion bro aapne ek achchi story likhi hai ..

Mujhe isme kuch jdya naya nhi dikha aur emotions utane ubhar kar samne nahi aa rahe hai,fir bhi aapki effort ke liye apko badhaniya

Best of luck for contest….

 

[KR$NA]

ISHQ WALA LOVE by the blue prince


Khoobsurat love story likhi hai writer ne jo honour killing par based hai . Ishika aur Rahul ki story hai jiska end sad hai lekin aksar love story ki end sad hi hoti hai

Plot old hai par writer ne bahut sanjidgi se develop kiya hai . Kahani me ek couple ke milne aur bichhad jane ko flashback ke madhyam se sundarta se darshaya gaya hai .

Kahani ka flow gajjab ka hai par shabdo ki ashuddhta ki wajah se samjhne me thodi dikkat pesh aayi, Bhasha par pakad to theek thaak hai par kuchh shabdo se sach me pareshan kiya .

Wakayi me ishq aur love se bhari huyi thi story . Mujhe wo shadi ki salgirah par picnic wale scene par bahut sad feel hua ki log jhoothi pratishtha ke fer me kitna neeche gir jate hain .

Thanks for writing wonder ful love story . All the best for contest

 

[humtum]

My Review for
Haunted
by humtum
HT bhai aap ki hinglish Entry pehla padha aur usske comparison mein yeh wala mujhe bahot ziada weak laga
plot achi hai, story ki narration achi hai,
Something which I did not understand is what had Varma aunty's fruit laden van which disappeared from outside the bungalow had to do with the story?!!
story to ghost ki belief par hai nah? to yeh pehla paragraph ka hona nah hona kuch atpata laga, weise pegla para padhkar mujhe laga koyi chorr ki kahani hai aur chorr ko dhunda jaega puri kahani mein
the first para of this story is very very interesting, the way the description of the colony and all events are told are really too good which made me read ahead with eager but to see all changing in the next para.
I felt that the first para is from another story not related to the actual story.
Well after that the whole narration and description about sanju going into the haunted house one year earlier and a second time were all well written.
the collective belief that the house was haunted was just people thought and finally Sanju succeeded to know that there was nothing inside the house.
in the whole good narration and good build up.
al the best HT bro.

Thanks for review chachu
Most of us know ghosts don't exist and it all depends on believe. In small town normally it happens that some mischievous people taking advantage for name of ghosts and trying to settle their scores or stealing items. Affected persons don't investigate the matter due to fear of God or ghosts in such cases.
My initial few incidents of that colony depicts the same thing. It was part of build up the situation bhai , but if you feel disconnect on that part then i feel sorry
Yes tried to maintain simple and limited . Thanks againfor your honest review

 

[Fighter]

Review for Wah Kiya Pyar He
By Lucky lerka

Story kafi Achi thi , Acha plot tha , mujhe apki ye peshkas Pasand aayi . Bas thoda padhne Mai problem aayi , sayad Hindi Mai apko thodi problem hai . Language Sahi Hoti to ye ek bohat Achi kahani Hoti.
Thanks for your story .

Thanks immortal bro for & liking & reading & supporting

Time nhi milne k karan bas itna hi likh saka or aapko pasand aayi y mere liye achhi baat h

 

[KR$NA]

Falling in love by Fighter

Apne naam ke hi anuroop kahani pahli najar ke pyar par based hai . College me senior ko apni junior se pahli najar me pahla pyar ho jata hai . Mujhe Kabir singh ki yaad aa gayi bhai .

Achha likha aap ne . Plot aur flow bhi theek hai . Msg wali language use ki hai writer ne lekin develop badhiya kiya hai .

Thanks for writing in usc . All the best for contest

 

[KR$NA]

Satva tona by Vijay

Waah kya kahani likhi hai royein khade ho gaye mere to Bilkul different plot jo kab shuru kab khatm ho gaya pata hi nahi chala . Aur bhi likha ja sakta tha waise

Ek ghatna ko kushalta se develop karke writer ne kahani banayi hai jiske har shabd mujhme utsukta bharta gaya ki ab kya hoga .

Mujhe sach me tona tokta se ghabrahat hoti hai kyu ki ham bhale chand par pahunch gaye hain par achambha nahi hoga yadi kal ko uske satah par koi jakar nimbu kaat aye

Ek bahut hi achhe se likhi gayi kahani hai , bahut achhi story jiska flow gajab ka hai aur ek do shabd chhod de to ashuddhi nahi hai .

Thanks for writing wonderful story . All the best for contest